


Let the Past die

by revengeworld



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, F/M, Zombie Apocalypse, Zombies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-17 12:04:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 21
Words: 51,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16974282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/revengeworld/pseuds/revengeworld
Summary: In just one night Y/Ns world turned up side down, her Parents dead and their murderer holding her close.





	1. Empty

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Feb 25th, 2018

It all happened unexpected and suddenly overnight. Nobody had suspected anything, no News in the Media, no weird attacks, no one ever thought that a think like the resurrection from the dead or the case of cannibalism would be happening in this area of time.

But the whole world seemed to have turned upside down in a matter of a few hours.

Now she was standing there, the blood of her parents splattered over her body, while the men who shot them presser her against his chest.

“Sweetheart, you are going to be late for school!” “I´m coming, Mom!”

She run down the stairs, pressing a binder against her chest and pulling the strap of her backpack over her shoulder.

“What took you so long?” “Sorry, I made sure that I have everything for my literature project.” while she patted the binder, she took one of the toasts that her mother had placed on the table.

“And don´t forget, come home after your club. We go out for Lunch for Dads Birthday.” “Yes Mom. I promise.”quickly making her way around the counter, after finishing her breakfast, kissing her Mother Goodbye and ruffling the ears of her old dog Benji.

As soon as she walked down the veranda, she almost run into someone. “Sorry…” a low voice mumbled, before the dark figure continued his path.

“No, i´m sorry…” she whispered shyly, knowing that he couldn´t hear her anymore. She knew him since she was little, since their family moved here when she was only 3 years old. He always seemed to keep to himself, his black strains of hair, mostly falling into his face hiding his dark eyes. Always covered in black clothing and rarely speaking.

The only thing the both of them had in common was their way to school.

 

When she finally arrived at the school, she was greeted by her friends who were already waiting for her.

It was a normal day, nothing out of the ordinary. They had a chemistry test in second period, Pizza for Lunch and nice giggle and chat after the school before they would need to go to their Clubs.

Walking through the halls , they all joked around carefree until a sudden announcement echoed through the halls and classrooms.

“EMERGENCY! This is not a drill! A violant disturbance has broken out on campus. There is an imminent risk of danger to participants and bystanders. For your own safety, please go into a building and take cover. If you are not in the Area, stay away. Follow instructions from school officials or local authorities. I repeat!”

The message repeated and the group of girls looked shocked at each other.

“Do you think this is a joke?” one of them asked scared and kept looking around.

“Didn´t you listen?! It´s not a drill.” another one hissed, but seemed just as terrified. “What should we do?”

Hearing tumult nearby, all of them started to panic. Y/n quickly rushed to the classrooms nearby and started to check and ruttle at the handles. “This one is open! Quick!!”

Looking over to her friends she noticed a small figure coming out of the boys bathroom.

It was a small boy, his dark brown hair standing up in all directions, his face pale and horrified.

She stopped in her tracks, quickly rushing to his side before down in front of him. When she saw his scared face she felt like it seemed quite familiar but couldn´t quite place it.

“Hey there, I know this seems all very scary right now but you need to hide with us, alright?”

For a moment he seemed relieved before but kept a safe distance.

“My Brother told me not to talk to strangers.” he mumbled shy. “That sa good advice your brother gave you, but at the moment …” she got interrupted by her friends.

“Y/N come on!!” they shrieked in a panic. “One Moment!!” she shushed them and turned back to the boy.

“The how about we become friends? My name is Y/N.” “B…Ben…”

Smiling down at him she place a hand gently on his shoulder.

“See Ben, now we are no strangers anymore….” a sudden sound around the corner made them flinch and she quickly pushed him to the classroom her friends were waiting. “But we really need to hide now!”

 

For the most time it stayed quiet. No Announcements, a few footsteps here and there but they really wasn´t sure if they could consider this a good thing or not.

The five of them were sitting in a corner of the classroom, pressed together under the last table they hadn´t used to barricade themselves.

“Do you guys think somebody will still come for us?” one of her friends began to share her worrys.

Y/N who had her arms around Ben to keep him calm, looked angry at her friend. “Of course somebody will come for us!” she hissed quiet, but after a few hours they just knew it couldn´t be just a small incident.

When they suddenly heard Gunfire outside the room, they tried to cover their screams and Y/N instinctively covered Bens ears until the door was pushed open by a few police officers.

“Alright Kids, we are from the state police and will bring you home. Please follow us. Everything will be alright now.” while they slowly followed the officers outside, Y/N carried Ben to spare him from the sight of the chaotic school. Broken Doors and windows, bloody handprints on the walls and distant sound of gun fire.

Feeling the little boy shake in her arms, she only pressed him nearer.

“Don´t worry, they will get us home soon.” she tried to encourage him and felt his slight nod against her shoulder. When they left the building it was already dark outside.

“A Van will bring you home, pleas get in the Line for your district and follow the orders of the officials.

“Ben where do you live?” she asked him while setting him down, he quickly held onto her hand. “Fr…Frankly Street, in Brooklyn.” the small boy stuttered.

“Thats good! I live in the same street! Stay close now, okay?” with a worried look she separated from her friends and pushed through the crowed to get to the Van they needed.

“Ben? BEN?!” the dark haired boy, she had run to in the morning was pushing threw the crowd and quickly kneeling down to the boy. “Are you okay? You hurt?” he asked worried but Ben only smiled. “No, Y/N helped me out!” and she could hear the older brother mumble a thanks. “That´s good, Bud. Come on we need to get home.”

Before she couldn´t even say her goodbye, the older one suddenly laid his hand on her lower back.

“Our Van is this way.” he explained without looking at her. “Thanks…uhm” she mumbled and walked along them.

“Kylo…” he answered her unspoken question and helped her into the car. Placing Ben on her lap before he took the place beside her. “I´m Y/N…” “I know.” for a moment she wasn´t sure, if she really had seen a little smirk form on his lips.

 

Seeing the familiar road, Y/N heart felt a lot more at ease and couldn´t wait to meet up with her parents.

“Please remember, pack a few things, just the important things, clothes, food rations and make your ways to the city halls in less then an hour! Your familys will be safe there!” the driver explained again before he let them outside.

“Good Luck.” she heard Kylos deep voice beside her. “You too.” ruffling through Bens hair before she rushed to her house.

“Mom? Mom are you here?!”

Now that she was home, her body suddenly started to shake and she couldn´t keep her voice from breaking. “Mom? Dad? Anybody?” it was just a whisper that escaped her lips and for a moment she didn´t know what she should do.

Frozen in place, her body just wouldn´t move until she heard a small yelp from the kitchen. “Benji?” stumbling into the dark room a scream was caught up in her throat.

The floor was covered in blood, her dog laying there while someone was leaning over him. A shiver running down her spine while she heard the crunching noise coming from that horrible scene in front of her and she was sure she would never forget these horrible sounds.

“Dad what are you doing?!” Y/N found her voice back, even though it only came out as a shriek. Her fathers head snapped in her direction, only letting out a low growl showing of his blood smeared teeth.

Before she could properly react, her father had grabbed her shoulders and was throwing her against the wall with a bone shaking scream.

“Dad, please…” Y/N whimpered trying to catch her breath. Slipping on the wet floor she fell to the ground, trying to crawl under the table she felt someone grabbing her leg and pulled her back.

This was it, this was the end. At keast that was what she thought until a sudden loud bang halled through the kitchen.

Her ears started ringing, and she pressed her shaking hands onto them while she screamed. When she opened her eyes again, her fathers body was lying to her feet, his face mutilated by the bullet that went through it.

This was a nightmare, she just needed to wake up. Pressing her eyelids shut she started to hit her head. Wake up! Wake up!!

Someone grabbed her wrist and pulled them away from her face. “Hey it´s me!” her eyes shot up to look into the honey brown eyes from Kylo.

First she was relieved to see him until she noticed the rifle in his hand. “You shot him … you killed him you monster!” she screamed before hitting his chest over and over.

Kylo just let her, while he laid an arm around her. “You need to listen to me. We need to get out of here as quickly as possible.”

She only whimpered and shoved him away. “What is wrong with you?!”

“That wasn´t your Dad anymore! He was sick, it´s some kind of infection! It´s spreading and if I hadn´t come you would be one of this things to!” his voice grew louder and he wasn´t sure how hhe properly should explain it to her.

Both of them flinched when they heard a scratching noise on the door to the cellar. Even though it were just weird growls coming from it, she knew exactly who was behind it. Seeing the bloodied handprints on the lock, she knew her father had locked his mother away in it.

“Do you have any scratches or bites?” Kylo asked while searching her arms, legs and upper body. “N…no I don´t think so.”

Another hiss came from the door and lightly bangs started to reach their ears. Kylo bit his lip and stood up again.

“Cover your ears…” he mumbled. And without questioning it her hands slowly raised up before she stopped.

“Wait! What if there is a cure?!” she shout whispered clinging to his arm.

But as soon as her eyes met his again she knew the answer.

“I´m sorry…” Kylo whispered.

Tears started streaming down her face while she pressed her hands onto her ears, the loud shot sending shivers down her spine.

Looking to the ground were Benjis empty eyes looked up at her and she couldn´t stop her sobs anymore.

The only thing that she felt was emptiness. Not even noticing Kylos arms wrap around her.


	2. Starry Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Mar 2nd, 2018

What should he say in such a situation? He wanted to break this uncomfortable silence, but the words just didn´t come out.

And what did he even expect as in answer? In her Eyes he was the murderer of her parents. Kylo felt his stomach turn, realising what he had just done. He had taken two lives in a span of a few minutes, scolding himself in thought he shook his head.

//No, they weren´t humans any more to begin with.//

Pulling Y/N of the cold and slippery floor he made sure she could stand on her own.

“We need to hurry, the shots may have caught the attentions of others of those things.” with a relieved sighed he noticed the small nod she had gave him.

“Let´s pack some stuff, we will take you with us.” Kylo didn´t know if his words even reached her any more, then her usual shining eyes seemed dull and cold, almost empty.

For a moment he thought she would just fall down on her knees again, but she only knelt down to loosen the collar from her dog before leaving the kitchen and not looking back.

Seeing her stumble up the stairs he quickly pulled his bag in front of him, throwing everything that would be useful in it. He felt bad and the guilt that was creeping up in his mind didn´t help but he needed to stay calm and remembered the words of his mother.

Rushing up the stairs, he jumped two steps at once, and looked into the rooms until he found her again. She had changed into clean clothes and a packed travel bag was lying on her bed, while she shoved personal items into her backpack.

When she pushed a few strands out her face, seeing the blood from her hands leaving a stroke on his forehead he clenched his jaw for a moment.

“Here, let me …”pulling her into the bathroom next door, Kylo grabbed a towel and held it underwater before carefully cleaning the blood of her face, continuing with her arms.

“Why did you came here?” she suddenly asked.

“Ben. He didn´t want to leave you behind.” Kylo cleared his throat and rubbed the blood from her hands.

“He is a good kid.”

Y/N didn´t look at him and just endured his touch, Kylo pressing his lips together with a huff. He just couldn´t bring himself to say something like an apology and stayed quiet until they heard a shout outside.

“Kylo! We need to go now!!” it was his brother who had waited for him. “Alright! Just a fucking moment!!” he yelled back and looked down on his wrist which she was holding onto that it almost hurt.

“We need to leave… Come.” grabbing the bigger bag he quickly shouldered it while she put the dog collar into her backpack and followed him.

For a moment she stopped at the closed kitchen door, letting her hand stroke over this oh so familiar dark wood before he continued her walk.

Quickly reloading his gun, Kylo looked outside the front door and saw his older brother almost crashing into the veranda with their red Pickup Truck.

“What the fuck, Matt?!” Kylo shouted and quickly waved to Y/N, that it was save to come out.

The blond driver looked panicked and shoved his glasses up his nose, what felt like the hundred time in a few minutes. “Their closing the main roads! Our only chance to get out of here are the secondary roads before they get closed of too.” he explained while opening the passenger door so they could jump in. Matt furrowed his brows when he only saw the two of them and looked at Kylo who slightly shook his head.

Looking at the girl Ben had immediately hugged, Matt wanted to say something encouraging but was interrupted by Kylo.

“Did you get another call from Mom?”

“Yeah she was the one who told me about the road closures. They didn´t tell this to the other citizens. I don´t know what to make of that…” he admitted while starting the car.

While they were driving through the street, everyone of them had a weird feeling in their stomach. This was the street they had grew up in and now they were forced to leave with nothing left but themselves.

 

All of them stayed quiet until they were out of the city, the thought that they would be stopped as soon as they would made a sound seemed to be in everyones mind.

Kylo was studying a map he had pulled out of the glove compartment, Matt was fixated on the road while Ben drifted in and out of sleep in Y/N Arms.

She was staring straight ahead, her head slightly leaned against Ben´s she was holding onto him dearly. His light snores seeming to calm her down while her mind tried to process the events that had lead to this moment.

“How did you guys know about all this? No Cure? The Weapons? The Highways being closed off …” her hoarse voice suddenly caught their attention and Kylo looked over to her.

Looking at her red eyes, he clenched his jaw for a moment before he answered.

“Our Mom works for the Government and our Dad is a Pilot in the Military. They keep us updated on the situation so we can get to them. For the time being we are heading towards Washington.” leaning over a bit he showed her the path they would need to take.

Following his finger with her gaze she noticed that they needed to avoid Philadelphia and drive around it.

“Will the Gas even last so long?” Y/N questioned and looked over to Matt, who shook his head lightly.

“We need to get Gas soon…”

Pressing his lips together, Kylo looked at the Map again. “There should be a Gas Station a few miles away. There is a small road behind it. We can walk from there, heading in from the Main road could be to dangerous.”

Soon they saw the lit sign of the small station across a field.

When Matt and Kylo exited the car, she carefully placed Ben onto the long front seat they all had shared for the last hour or so. But when she wanted to follow, Kylo held her back. “I need you here.”

“What why?” confused she pulled away her arm were he had placed his hand.

“Somebody needs to look after Ben and our stuff.”

She knew he wasn´t wrong, but how was she supposed to do anything if someone tried to steal the car. In the meantime Kylo had moved to the open trunk and was rummaging through a bag before he returned. Pinning a Walkie Talkie to his belt, he pushed the other one in her free hand. “Channel 2.”

The next thing he gave her was a combat knife. “Kylo…”

“Just listen! Hold it downwards, it gives you more strength while stabbing then poking around with it. Aim for the head. Eyes, Neck or from the throat upwards.” he explained before he pulled a pistol from the back of his jeans.

“Safety off.” he flipped a small switch on the side of the black gun. “Safety on.” returning the switch in his former position he checked if she was watching properly.

Pressing the button on the side, the magazine slipped out. “This is how you empty your gun. There is still a bullet in the barrel.” Kylo pulled the slide back and a bullet sprung out, which he caught immediately. Pressing it back into the magazine he pushed the full magazine back into the gun. Pulling the slide another time he held the gun to her.

“Now it´s loaded and ready. Understood everything?” looking into her Eyes he knew she was scared, but after she took a deep breath she reached out for it.

The gun felt heavy in her hand and even though it should give her the feeling of comfort and safety, it only made her feel uneasy. Looking over to Ben, she knew there was no place for that, if she wanted to protect this little boy.

“Safety off. Safety on. Magazine out. Still one bullet in the barrel. Bullet back into the Magazine. Magazine back into the gun. Pulling back. Gun loaded.” Y/N swiftly repeated and after she finished, Kylo only had a proud smirk on his lips.

“Same with the knife, aim at the head. Use it only as a last resort, okay?”

“Okay.” she nodded and looked down at the weapons in her hand while Matt gave Kylo an empty backpack.

Looking at the older brother she noticed that Matt looked as uncomfortable with the gun as she felt like. And she could feel a sympathy grew for him.

She wanted to say something to the two man who were risking their lives right now to get the things they needed for their safe travels, but Kylo had already closed the car door and vanished into the dark night.

Biting her lip, Y/N looked after them and thought about what they did for her. Especially Kylo who had come for her, who had saved her life. She could have been dead now if it wasn´t for him or Ben who had talked him into getting her in the first place. And what did she do? She called him a Monster for saving her life.

The light in the drivers cabin slowly dimmed itself before it went completely out and her eyes adjusted to the dark.

Looking up through the glass, she could see the stars, if it wouldn´t be the end of the world this would have been one beautiful night.

When the sound of static came from the walkie talkie, Y/N instinctively ducked into the footwell.

“Y/N? Y/N can you hear me?” recognizing Kylos voice she reached up the seat and tried to answer him.

“Y..Yeah I can hear you.”

Hearing his low chuckle she felt weirdly at ease.

“Say, what is your favourite snack?” almost ridiculed by his question she needed a second to think about it, before she listed a few small things.

“Good to know. We will be back soon.” Kylo promised before the static returned and it was silent again.

Ben suddenly started to shuffle around and sat up. Looking around, it seemed like he needet a moment to remember were he was until he saw Y/N again.

“Hey Bud, you good?” she stroked the wet hair strands, that were sticking to his forehead, back.

“Uhm…” the Boy suddenly seemed to be embarrassed. “I really need to pee.” he mumbled quietly and Y/N petted his head.

“Can you hold it a little longer?”

Shaking his head, she nodded and looked outside again. It didn´t seem like anything or anyone was near them and she quickly checked the gun again before she pushed it in the back of her jeans like Kylo did before. Opening the door as quietly as possible, she climbed out and quickly helped Ben down.

“Remember we need to be quiet and fats okay?” pulling a few handkerchiefs out her backpack she went with Ben near a bush.

While Ben did his business she looked around, the knife at the ready if anything would come near them.

“I´m done…”

When she looked over her shoulder to Ben she quickly squatted down and held Bens mouth shut. Two, no three figures were stumbling through the tall grass and she could tell by their movement that they weren´t human any more.

“We need to get to the car, now!” she whispered to the boy who immediately nodded, but when they were crouching towards the car Ben stumbled over what seemed to be the rest of a plastic bag.

The rustling sound immediately caught the creatures attention, their heads snapping in the direction Ben and her were hiding in.

They started to move towards the sound, faster then she expected and she felt her body freeze in place.

What was she supposed to do?!


	3. Static

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Mar 9th, 2018

“Matt, how are you doing over there?” Kylo was carrying two canisters of destiled water in each hand and placed them outside the gas station next to their filled backpacks.

“It´s almost full, just a few more minutes.” his older brother explained while pushing his glasses up again.

“Well then I get some more food and tell the kids that we´re back soon.” munching on a chocolate bar, Kylo made another round through the empty shop and put everything they could use into one of the shopping bags from the counter.

Throwing in travel toothbrushes, toothpaste, maps, small bottles of juice for Ben and Y/N and basically everything he could basically find.

Even a bottle of alcohol went into the bag, since he knew they didn´t have much disinfection spray.

He stopped in front of a shelf, looking at a cheap Polaroid camera and threw it in as well as some films for it before returning outside.

“You shouldn´t take so much, other people could need it as well.“ Matt suddenly mumbled and Kylo only cocked a brow.

“Do you really think somebody else would care about the well being of others in this kind of situation? Everyone fends for themselves, the world has always been like this. Now they just don´t have to act the nice part anymore.”

Sometimes Kylo couldn´t believe how naive his older brother could be, maybe that was why he turned out to be so sceptical.

“Y/N, we are almost done here. How are things on your End?” when he loosened the grip on the walkie talkie the only thing he could hear was the static crackling threw the speaker.

“You hear me?” another moment with no answer and his head snapped to Matt who looked back at him while the canister in his hand got dangerously full.

“You don´t think something happened?” Matt quickly shut the Gas of and screwed the lid shut, while Kylo threw the backpack over to him, quickly pulling his own over his shoulders and grabbing the big cans of water.

While they were stumbling through the field, Kylo tried to reach out to her via the Walkie Talkie until he suddenly heard Bens quiet voice.

“Please come quick…” the small boy whispered before the static rung in their ears again.

Immediately starting to run, both of them couldn´t stop to think of the worst case scenario.

When the truck came in sight both of them slowed down to catch their breaths, Kylo letting out a relieved sighed.

Y/N was sitting on the cargo bed, staring into the other direction while Ben was looking out the window from the drivers cabin.

Continuing their walk Matt and Kylo arrived with heavy breaths and let the heavy loot fall onto the ground.

“What the hell happened?” leaning against the truck he followed her gaze and grabbed his knife.

“I´m sorry, I didn´t have time to respond and …” shaking her head for a moment she looked at the bloody knife in her hand.

“They were attracted by the sound of that plastic bag when we stumbled over it. I tied it to the bush but one of them seemed to noticed us while we sneaked away.”

Kylo saw a body a few feet away and just nodded. “Thank you, for keeping Ben safe. I take care of them.”

Quickly grabbing Kylos shoulder, Y/N tried to hold him back.

“They are distracted, just let them be. We will be gone before they even notice.” she plead, not wanting him or anyone else in danger if it could be avoided.

Loosening her grip gently he turned back around to Y/N. “Would you forgive yourself if they would cross somebody elses path who isn´t as prepaired as we are?”

Looking into his brown eyes, she felt herself suddenly nodding and let go of his jacket.

“I´ll … I´ll help you.” surprised Kylo stopped in his tracks but helped her down from the trunk.

“You don´t need to do this.” he reminded her, but she had a stern look in her eyes.

“Nobody should be left in this kind of state. Who knows if they realise what their doing but just can´t control their bodys anymore…. And need to watch everything but can´t stop themselves. I wouldn´t want to stay like that.” clenching her hand around the handle of the knife, her knuckles slowly turned white.

“Alright…” he nodded, leading the way.

 

After filling the tank to the brim, Kylo went a second time to get more Gas and they adjusted all their belongings on the cargo bed so the middle was accessible for at least a sleeping bag or two.

It was tight but it would be good enough for the rest of the night and a good rest.

“I´ll take the first watch.” Kylo offered his brother, while looking over to Y/N and Ben who filled the driver cabin with a few blankets.

“No it´s alright I´ll do it. Just because Dad and Uncle Luke tried to make you into a fighter, doesn´t mean you always have to be one, you know?” the Blonde sighed, his voice filled with guilt.

Just because he was such a failure, his younger brother had to take this burden instead. Sitting down next to Matt, Kylo only gave him a light hit against the back of his head. Matt quickly grabbed his glasses so they wouldn´t fall off.

“Don´t worry about that. It comes in handy now doesn´t it.” with an encouraging smirk he laid an arm around Matts shoulders and pushed their heads together.

“You are my brother. No matter what happens and you always will be.”

“Maybe I would have been better as a little brother huh?” Matt laughed before they got distracted by footsteps.

“Sorry I didn´t mean to interrupt.” Y/N clutched onto the sweatjacket around her shoulder while circling to the end of the truck.

Both of the boys stretched a hand out to her, so she could join them on the trunk.

“Can´t sleep?” Kylo asked and Matt saw how his younger brother was looking at the girl. Shoving his glasses back onto his nose Matt could only smirk and hopped from the truck. “I´ll look after Ben.”

Y/N and Kylo looked after the blonde man, then at eachother and Kylo only shrugged with his shoulders. Seeing that she quickly pulled the Hood of her jacket over her head and pulling her legs close to her chest, he tried to reach for a blanket.

“No it´s fine.” Y/N tried to argue, but Kylo could see her shiver.

“You should at least get in one of the sleeping bags.” he countered sternly and the only thing she could do was to give in.

Crawling to the other end of the truck, she cuddled into the sleepingbag and leaned her back against the drivers cabin, before Kylo sat down next to her.

Squished against his wide shoulders and their bags, she suddenly started to giggle. “Well know i´m sure i´m not getting cold anymore.” she joked and a rare smile appeared on Kylos lips.

“I still can´t wrap my head around what has happened. A few hours ago I was worrying about my chemistry test and now ….” shaking her head for a moment, she pulled her legs closer again to rest her head on her knees.

“It seems to be some kind of infection. Mom told us that there were incidents already, but the government choose to not tell it to the puplic. They didn´t expect it to run wild in just a few hours.”with every word his voice grew deeper with anger.

“How does the infection work?” it was just a mere whisper, but he knew that she porpably had it on her mind for a while.

“Was there really no cure at all?” she didn´t cry, no sobs either and her voice didn´t break, but it still made his stomach turn.

“Not… for everyone.”

“So you lied to me?!” Y/Ns head snapped immediately up to look him directly in his eyes.

Laying his big hand onto her head, he sighed.

“No. No, I didn´t. It was to late for them… If you get bit or even scratched, the infection will kill you and then it is like a restart. But Nothing is left of the former self.” he explained calmly.

“So only those who just got infected but didn´t die can be rescued?”

Slowly nodding his head, Kylo sighed again and lifted his hand from her head.

For a moment there was just a comfortable silence between them until Y/N spoke up again.

“Kylo? I´m… I´m sorry for calling you a monster.” he could hear in her voice that she felt uncomfortable to bring it up again.

“Don´t worry. It´s not the first time I hear that. Really it´s alright.”

She scoffed and looked up at him again. “Well that doesn´t sound alright to me. Who said that?”

“Does it matter?” Kylo returned the question with a grin. Shrugging with her shoulders Y/N only sighed.

Feeling his enormous hand on her head again, she tried to look up. “But I appreciate your apology.”

With a grown she laid her head on her knees again and he rased an eyebrow.

“Everything alright?”

“I feel a little naceous…” she mumbled and it felt like a lighting bulb went off over his head.

“Shoot, you didn´t have any food! I totally forgot to give you and Ben the stuff we took.” lightly tapping onto the window from the drivers cabin, Kylo waited until Ben sticked his head up. “You hungry, buddy?”

“Starving!” his younger brother nodded and opened the window to take the plastic bag with snacks for him.

Handing Y/N the other bag, her Eyes widened at her favourite pie on top.

“I can´t believe you really got some!” she grinned and immediately bite into the sweet tart.

“Slow down, otherwise you´re gonna choke.” while laughing, Kylo offered her a small bottle of water.

While to other two were filling their tummys and Matt made another round, Kylo studied the maps again, before he noticed something heavy against his arm.

Looking down at it, he saw Y/N had fallen asleep and slowly sunk down against him.

Only a few more hours and their all would be in Washington and reunited with their Parents. At least that it was Kylo thought, not knowing how wrong he was.


	4. Nothing left

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Mar 16th, 2018

Kylo jolted out of his sleep when he heard an unfamiliar sound. Ben stood in front of him with the Polaroid Camera in his tiny hands and aggressively shook the New Photo he had just shot.

Taking a deep breath he watched his small little baby brother, who still was shaking the picture and seemed to enjoy himself.

“What did you shot, Buddy?”

Ben started to giggle and shook his head. “Nothing!”  
“Little devil…” Kylo mumbled while his little brother crawled over to Matt who was sitting on the edge of the Trunk.

Just noticing how bright it already was, Kylo froze for a moment. “Fuck! Y/N wake up.”

Grabbing her shoulder, he tried to shake her gently but received a heavy punch against his jaw.

“Oh shit…sorry!” Surprised but already laughing, she quickly caught his face between her hands and squished his cheeks. “Are you okay?”

It got very quiet for a moment before all of them bursted out into loud laughter.

“Man, you got a really mean punch, you know that?” Kylo chuckled while stroking over his hurting chin.

“I´m really sorry….” Y/N giggled, which he didn´t quiet believe her, but smirked none the less.

“How late is it anyway? You didn´t fucking wake me.” while ruffling through his dark locks he looked at Matt who shrugged his shoulders and just yawned as an answer.

Since Kylo would be driving this time, they adjusted the cargo bed for Matt and Ben to rest. Y/N would join Kylo in the drivers cabin, helping him navigate.

“At the next crossroad, take a left…” she mumbled, carefully dragging her finger over the point of the map were they should be right now.

“What do you think will be waiting for us there?” curious her gaze wandered to red cross on the map.

“Hopefully a nice steak and a hot shower!” Kylo responded enthusiastic, but Y/N rolled her eyes.

“I´m serious Kylo. I mean the city can´t just be unharmed and if we need to drive through the city …” she bit her lip.

“It will be fine, it must be. Otherwise our Mother wouldn´t have send us here.” carefully steering the car, Kylo looked further down the road. Noticing big smoke clouds behind some trees.

Y/N followed his gaze and looked down the map again. “Do you think it´s Washington?”

“It´s not!” he suddenly spat and Y/N flinched when she heard his sharp and loud tone and immediately went quiet.

“It just can´t be, she would have told us.” he gritted his teeth, his hands gripping the steering wheel tighter.

Taking a deep breath, Kylo huffed for a moment before he concentrated on the road again.

He was nervous, scared even, she could tell by his sudden shift in behaviour, but since she didn´t know him long enough to return any encouraging words.

Now that she thought about it, she didn´t knew anything about these three boys or their family.

The Solos were always nice and polite, but mostly kept to themselves in the neighbourhood. Especially Kylo, who never seemed to interact with anyone, even in school she only had seen him with two other persons. Phasma, who was the first Female Captain of the Football Team and Hux, who was mostly known as the ‘General’ because of his good grades and elite attitude.

But other then what Kylo had told her yesterday about his parents, she only could guess the rest. Looking at Matt, his orange vest kind of gave it away that he probably was some kind of Engineer or Technician with all the tools that were poking out of his pockets. Ben seemed like a normal Gradeschooler, with a fascination for space and everything that had something to do with it, at least that was what she could make out from his sweater and the comics in his small backpack.

She saw the small boy, through the window, looking at the pictures he had made earlier and neatly placed them into one of the comics.

At least someone still had a little bit of fun, Y/N thought to herself before she noticed the bag behind him.

“I see you took your guitar with you.” trying to steer the conversation in another direction, she take his mind off of Washington.

“What?” his eyebrows rose because of that unexpected comment.

“Your guitar, I actually didn´t think you would take it with you.” pointing over her shoulder to the back, he only shrugged with his shoulders.

“Why do you think it´s mine?” finally understanding that she was changing the subject for his sake.

“You have … had” she corrected. “- the weird trait to play it exactly between 2 and 3am.” Y/N smirked, while remembering him to turn the next street right.

“You heard?” his voice grew an octave higher, but Y/N didn´t even noticed it since she needed to correct the route they were taking.

“Yeah, at least the guitar play.” she mumbled and Kylo let out a huff. “I actually quite liked it, but I would have preferred if you would have practised at more reasonable times.”

Clearing his throat he suddenly grinned.

“Well we can still make up for it and when we are safe I play something for you.”

Returning his smile she nodded. “That would be nice, I´d like that.”

But before he could say something else in return, Kylo suddenly hit the breaks. Y/N could hear Matts head collide with the drivers cabin and Bens sudden shriek.

“Kylo, what the hell…” looking up, she didn´t even need to wait for an answer.

“No… no that can´t be happening. FUCK!!” punching the steering wheel again and again, Kylo let out a frustrated scream.

The city stood in flames, buildings were destroyed and black smoke filled the air. Washington was wiped out.

After the first shook flooded over her, Bens faint crying reached her ear, as well as Kylos who let out a an angry grunt before kicking the drivers door open.

Indistinctly rushing after him, Y/N climbed to the open door to stop him.

“Kylo, please no!”

Seeing how furious he stomped to the side of the pick up to reach Ben he grabbed the little boys collar and started to yell, Y/N was almost terrified.

“Quit your damn crying!! Do you think that helps anybody?! Man the fuck up!!”

Pushing herself between Kylo and the truck she tried to get a hold of his arms. Matt in the meantime held his head and tried to calm Ben down who was shivering in fear from his brothers outburst.

“Let him go! Kylo for fucks sake stop!!” with all she had, Y/N shoved the dark haired boy away.

Getting him further away from the other two she only could shake her head at him.

“What the hell was that about?!” Y/N hissed.

“Don´t you get it, princess?” Kylo spat back and was gesturing to the destroyed city. “Nothing is left! We are fucked!” he growled dangerously low and kicked against the ground.

“But you can´t just let your anger out on your baby brother! He is just a boy and he is scared!” trying to look him in the eye, Kylo just avoided her gaze.

“Didn´t you listen?”

“I did! But like you said to him! Man up, the first thing we should do is try to contact your parents and look for shelter!” she rambled the first things down that came to her mind.

“They are gone! There is nobody to contact!” Kylo argued and his voice grew louder again.

“You don´t know that!” Y/N screamed back. Shaking her head she only scoffed at him.

“Fine if you don´t want to help, so be it.”

Turning around she wanted to leave him behind, but he followed her quickly with wide steps. In his anger he didn´t even noticed her painful wince, when he grabbed her upper arm and twisted Y/N back around to him.

Before Kylo could even say something her hand had landed on his cheek with such strength that his grip loosened.

“Never, touch me like that again!”

Shocked he laid his hand onto his hurting jaw, surprised not just from her but from himself as well. “Y/N…” his voice now calmer he tried to take a step closer, but she immediately retreated.

“You know, you are not the only one who lost something right now.” with a sad and disappointed look she shook her head.

Watching her return to the others, he only stood there aggressively ruffling through his dark locks before punching the nearest tree.

Ben was trying to steady his sobs, it was clear that he was scared that Kylo would scream at him again. But when the little boy saw Y/N he just couldn´t keep it together any more and broke out into loud sobs.

Climbing onto the cargo bed she pulled him into her arms and tried to calm him down while she stroked through his hair.

“It will be alright. Your Brother just needs a little time okay?” looking over to Matt she inhaled sharply.

“You alright?” she pushed the blonde locks of the oldest brother back and looked at his bloody forehead.

“It´s nothing…” he mumbled, his voice heavy. Y/N nodded to show him that she understood and gently pushed Ben away to look at him.

“How about you get in the car for awhile and your brothers and I figure something out.” after Ben agreed, she brought him around to the front of the car and wrapped him into a blanket.

“I´ll let you borrow this.” after she had rummaged in her bag he pulled out an Ipod and placed the headphones into his ears.

With an encouraging smile she patted his cheek before closing the passenger door.

Returning to Matt she looked at his wound again.

“Is he normally like… well…” she could only sighed, when she thought about Kylos outburst.

“My little brother always had a little anger problem yeah.” the blonde guy admitted and flinched when she patted a pad with alcohol onto the small cut.

“But he never, ever did it in front of Ben. Especially not getting him involved. But this…”

Packing a big bandage on his forehead she leaned back.

“I get it, he is frustrated and lost, but so are we. And we need to get Ben somewhere safe and wait till we get a chance to contact your parents.”

Looking over her shoulder to the still burning city, she tried to think of a solution.

“The suburb seems almost untouched, maybe we find other people or at least an empty house were we can stay for awhile.” Y/N suggested and Matt only nodded until they heard footsteps approaching.

Kylo slowly stumbled towards them, head hanging low and avoiding their gazes.

The only thing Matt could do was scoff, before he joined Ben in the cabin.

When Kylo stood in front of her, he looked like a lost puppy now that his anger had seemed to calm down.

He opened his mouth to say something, but stayed quiet.

Seeing how he rubbed over his bruised and bloody knuckles, she prepared a new pad with whiskey.

“Come here.” Y/N demanded and he obliged and climbed onto the truck, letting himself fall next to her.

Slowly reaching out for his hand, she gently patted the liquid onto his fresh wounds. He didn´t flinch like Matt did and endured everything.

Before she could wrap the bandage around his hands, Kylo stopped her and took her small hands in his.

“Y/N, I …” “You are an idiot.” she finished the sentence for him.

“Yeah… I´m sorry.” his voice was rough, probably from all the screaming.

“I´m glad that you are, but Ben is the one who should hear this.”

Kylo looked down at his hands again, were she carefully tied the bandage around his wounds.

“I know and I will, just another moment.”

Taping the end down, Y/N looked at her clumsy work, but it would do for now.

“I know you are …frustrated or whatever, but Ben is just a child. He doesn´t know what really is going on. I mean the poor boy doesn´t even know how to handle all those feelings of being this scared. We are the only thing Ben has at the moment.” Pushing his chin up a little she looked at him, Kylo instantly nodding.

“Right.” he agreed, letting his head hang down again, black strains of hair fell into his eyes.

“And Kylo, don´t do this again…” she nodded towards the wounds on his hand and he only let out an acknowledging huff.

“Then let´s get all somewhere safe soon.” discussing the plan with him, her eyes wandered down to her hands were Kylo still gently held onto her fingertips.


	5. Left behind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Mar 23rd, 2018

Running his fingers under the warm water, Kylo sighed relieved. They were lucky enough, to find an abandon house fairly quick and luckily there was no incident with the Undead.

Sneaking down the stairs again, he met the others in the living room.

“Upstairs is safe. We even have warm water thanks to the solar panels I guess.” Kylo explained, while setting his rifle down to help Matt and Y/N barricade the front door with a heavy looking dresser.

“The Master Bedroom seems big enough, we can put all the mattresses there.” returning to the garage, where their parked the truck, they started to unpack the necessitys they would need for the rest of the day.

After they prepared the room, they all seemed a little bit more relaxed.

“So who wants to take the first shower?” Kylo asked while he placed the bag with guns down.

“How about you and Ben go together. I can go last and wash our clothes afterwards.” Y/N suggested and everyone was on board with that idea, even though Ben was hesitant at first but quickly followed his older brother after deciding on fresh clothes.

When she heard the water running, Y/N looked over to Matt.

“No luck?” she asked.

Matts shook his head and threw his phone on the nightstand. “Lines are down, no Homephone or mobile.”

Hectic he searched for a specific bag, when he finally found what he was looking for, Y/n had already barricaded the stairs just in case.

“What´s that chunky thing?” sitting down on the floor next to the blonde, Y/N watched him curious.

“Satellite phone from our dad…” he mumbled, totally observed in whatever he was doing, at least for Y/N it just looked like he was randomly pressing a bunch of buttons.

Seeing that he was to concentrated, to continue the conversation, Y/N stood up again and looked around the other rooms upstairs.

Slandering along the corridor she reached a childrens room. It as chaotic, clothes pulled out of the drawers and toys spread over the whole floor. Picking up a stuffed astronaut she thought about the child that left it behind and the family that ran away in such a rush.

Even though they kept the windows closed, Y/N could still smell the smoke on her clothes and looked outside the window.

There was still fire which seemed to slowly burn out, but the big smoke wall was still filling the sky.

Caught up in her thoughts, Y/N reached the next room, probably from a teenage girl about the same age as her.

Same as the other room it was left in chaos, his previous owner abandoning everything in a panic.

Looking around the room, she thought about the things she had to abandoned just a few hours ago. And the things that had lead to all this.

Taking in a shaky breath, Y/N tried to keep herself from crying again, the horrible pictures of her dead parents flashing before her Eyes.

But since she was alone, she took this time to let her feelings and tears out, finally taking a moment to grieve properly.

Her chest ached, the sobs were shaking her whole body, but after a while Y/N finally calmed down again. This whole time she felt guilt, for not being able to be with them in their last seconds, but they wouldn´t want her to feel this way.

She was still alive and she wouldn´t take this second chance for granted, for their sake and her own. Drying her tears she took a deep breath and continued her tour through the room.

“Here you are…” she heard Kylo mumble behind her while she was invested with the books in the room.

Turning around she almost choked on her own spit by this sudden and unexpected sight.

The tall boy was standing in the open doorframe, zipping up his low hanging jeans and fiddling with his belt while his upper body was exposed and his wet, dark hair was sticking to his face.

Quickly turning to the books again she nodded. “Matt seemed occupied so I thought I look around a bit.”

“Yeah if he is focused once, it´s hard to break his concentration.” Kylo nodded knowingly.

“I talked to Ben and apologized. We are good now.” Kylo explained and walked over to her, inspecting the bookshelf.

“I´m glad to hear that. Are you okay?” when she looked up at him, he started to shook his head quickly to get the hair out of his face and Y/N quickly held the book up to shield her from the water.  
“I´m just… She could have warned us you know? My Mum was here I mean she would have told us.” combing his hair back with his fingers.

“Anyway, how are you?” surprised at that question she looked up at him.

“Im fine… well as fine as I can be.” Y/N tried to flash him a reassuring smile and he didn´t push further, even though he noticed her red eyes.

“Are your bandages okay?” she suddenly asked and he immediately looked away so Y/N wouldn´t catch him staring. Thats why he didn´t even notice that she was trying to avoid looking at his chest aswell.

“They are fine.” clearing his throat he looked around the girly posters.

“Thats good…” she mumbled and pulled one book off the shelf.

The room filled itself with an uncomfortable silence, since both of them didn´t exactly know what they should talk about until Ben called for Y/N.

“The Bathroom is free now.” he immediately greeted her and looked surprised at the stuffed austronaut.

“I think this young, space gentleman needs another partner for his adventures. Are you up for that?” she asked Ben, whos eyes widened surprised.

“Yes!” the small boy almost shouted and brought the toy to his backpack, were he pulled out his comics.

Smiling at him she went to her own bag to get some fresh clothing and underwear, ready to have a hot shower herself.

The rest of this evening, the four of them stayed in the Masterbedroom. Y/N was munching on her canned peaches, while watching Ben who played with his astronaut. Matt was focused to get a connection with any kind of phone, but got more and more frustrated. The clicking of Guns filling the room since Kylo took this moment to clean and check them.

“Y/N … give me your gun aswell.” he mumbled while placing his shotgun in the bag again.

Pulling the pistol out of her back, Y/n slowly crawled over to him. “Can you show me?” she asked curious and he only shrugged with his shoulders.

“Sure, it´s yours now, better you know how to properly use it.”

 

The first Night took a lot of getting used to. Even though the bed was a kingsize it was hard for the four of them to get into comfortable positions. And the unfamiliar sounds around them did not help at all, the small explosions from afar and sometimes the hissing and growling from the undead. Ben couldn´t fall asleep until Y/n gave him her Ipod again. Like expected from Matt he neatly slept on his back while having Bens feet in his face, holding on to his soft astronaut. Y/N was curled up and hugging the little boys torso. And Kylo with his brode body was pressed against her back so he wouldn´t fall down.

They could have just used the other rooms, but all of them felt safer this way, even though nobody was actually saying it.

Even after two weeks, they preferred to sleep in the big bed together instead of splitting up.

“We should make another food run today.” Y/N suggested while looking through their cans, snacks and bottles. Kylo who just came into the room looked over her shoulder.

“Yeah, then we should go soon, before the sun sets and the biters come out again.” squatting down next to her he helped her empty a few bags they could need for scavenging. Since they didn´t have met any survivors who might have come back, they couldn´t avoid taking the things they needed to survive.

“Matt and Ben?” she asked while putting her jacket on and controlling her belt where the gun and knife was secured.

“Looking around the basement for useful stuff.”

Calling down to them, Kylo informed his siblings that he and Y/N would be out for the time being. Even though he was frustrated with the situation, Kylo tried to not let his anger get to him and instead directed it towards the Biters.

“Do you want to look for anything specific?” Y/N after awhile, enjoying the sun on her skin.

“More Ammo would be nice, maybe something else then freaking raviolis.” he rolled his Eyes, crossing his Arms behind his head.

She started to chuckle, but shook her head.

“I mean something you would like to have that´s not necessary for our survival.” not getting an answer she turned around, seeing that Kylo stopped in his tracks, thinking.

“Oh… I just didn´t bother to think about that, honestly.” the only thing his mind was occupied with was survival.

“It´s alright, but remember to take a break from time to time. You still owe me a concert.” Y/N grinned at him and continued her walk to the next house.

 

When they returned, the other two had only found winter clothing and old furniture and layed bummed out on the bed.

Ruffling through Bens hair, Y/N sat down the heavy backpack and started to unpack their loot. Throwing each of them a pack of gummybears, their mood seemed to lighten up a little.

Turning her attention to the other boy infront of her, she noticed that Kylo was biting his thumb again, a nervous habit that he had adapted while they were waiting for any news.

Quickly grabbing his wrist she pulled his hand down before he could bite it bloody. For a moment he seemed surprised, ripped out of his thoughts but then nodded understanding why she did it.

Brushing his hair back out of his face with his long fingers, it fell right into his eyes again and Y/N suddenly held a hairtie his way.

“Thanks…” he mumbled, taking it and tied half his hair up, his eyes still lingering on her. Kylo found it fascinating how she oculd tell what somebody needed just by watching them.

Caught up in his thought he didn´t even notice the strange ringtone that came from the nightstand until the other three jumped.

“It´s Dad!” Matt announced.

“Well then fucking answer it!” Kylo quickly joining him on the bed. Y/n hopped next to Ben and Matt answered the call.

“Boys?!” a rough voice came through the speaker and the three siblings had the widest grins on their faces.

“What the fuck took you so fucking long, old man?!” Kylo shouted into the phone and already heard an annoyed grunt from his father. “Kylo… language.”

“Sucks to be you then, because thats not happening! Especially since you just…”

“Kylo!” flinching at the loud voice, the blackhaired boy only tsked.

“Things got out of hand very quickly. Leia got evacuated, I don´t even know where to yet but she is safe that is the only thing that matters. And that you three are safe.”

“Four!” Ben suddenly interrupted.

“We safed Y/N because she safed me!” he proudly told his father and they heard a chuckle.

“Then I´m glad that all four of you are fine. And I´m very thankfull that she did this. But I don´t have much time. I need you guys to make your way to Atlanta. At the moment the military is defending the CDC. I will be waiting here and then we will fly to your mother. Understood?” the two older brothers repeated the plan for him and Han seemed relieved.

“Be safe, children.”

“You too, old man.” when the call ended, nobody said a word, letting the informations they got sink in.

“CDC?” Y/N asked and Matt was the one who answered her question. “It´s the Center for Disease Control.”

Nodding her head she looked over to Kylo who placed the Map onto the Mattress.

“We drive early morning, with a little luck we will only need about … what Ten hours to Atlanta?” Kylo asked and Matt nodded.

“But we should be careful when it get´s dark. Maybe drive as long as we can and then find a safe place for the Night.” Y/N objected and the others nodded.

“We should pack.”

Sorting everything they had and adjusting everything on the truck again, the sun soon set and the kids got ready for the night.

Y/N couldn´t almost believe it, maybe tomorrow they will finally be escaping this nightmare and she hoped she wouldn´t have any tonight.

But the real nightmare began when she woke up. Bright light was shining into her eyes and she blinked a few times before shooting up.

Did the boys forgot to wake me? She thought to herself while looking around, her heartbeat almost stopped.

The room was completely empty, no bags, the bed so unfamiliar neatly made and no sound from the others.

Throwing the blanket aside, she run out the bedroom, searching for them in every room before making her way into the garage.

The Truck was gone, they had left… They had really left her behind!


	6. Lullaby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Mar 30th, 2018

After the first shock, Y/N run back upstairs, looking for anything. A note, her stuff, just anything that would have told her what happened. Maybe they were just out on a last run before taking off? But why wouldn´t they tell her? Why wouldn´t they take her along?

Tears started to flood her eyes and she tried to wipe them away. This couldn´t be! They wouldn´t …

But they left nothing behind, even her stuff was gone, Y/N had only the things that were on her body.

Digging her fingers into her hair, she tried to think, but the only thing in her mind was one question.

“How could they do this to me?”

Trying to steady her breath she stumbled back down the stairs and into the kitchen, grabbing the first knife she could see before leaving the house. Maybe they weren´t far, maybe she could catch up to them! But would they even let her? What was to say they wouldn´t just push her away again?

Running through the streets while the sun was burning on her skin, Y/N tried to find any hint of a red truck or the boys somewhere.

Occupied with her search, she didn´t even realise that they were no undead in sight or walking around.

Coming to the end of the street, the front of a familiar house came in sight.

“No… it can´t be.” taking a look over her shoulder she saw the house she just left in the distance.

Slowly making her way through the front garden, Y/N carefully opened the front door where a hand reached out to claw on her neck.

“No! Please!” trying to pull the boney hand away from her, she scratched the arm and felt the air leaving her lungs.

“NO!”

 

Her Eyes shot open, still feeling something on her neck she tried to fight whatever was holding her until a deep voice reached her ear.

“Y/N! Y/N hey it´s me! It´s me, calm down.” seeing the familiar face with the honey brown eyes, she let go of Kylos arms, the tall boy looking concerned down at her.

Her chest was rising violently while she tried to catch her breath, cold sweat covering her body.

“It was just a nightmare.” helping her, to sit in an upright position, Kylos eyes were filled with worry. Not only has she scratched the palms of her hand bloody, she had given him a long cut on his wrist as well, while Y/N had tried to fight him off.

Feeling her shaking arms around his torso, Kylo immediately froze in place while her sobs were ringing in his ears.

“Please…” he heard her whimper. “Don´t leave…”

Taking a deep breath, he gently wrapped his Arms around her, his fingers automatically started running through her hair.

“I won´t. I promise.”

 

A hot shower later, she was standing next to Kylo and packed the last bags before they would depart from this house that had given them shelter the last few weeks.

“You good?” Kylo asked after Ben had left the room with his astronaut. Since the others hadn´t seen Y/N´s outbreak, both of them agreed to keep it a secret just between them.

Nodding her head she shouldered her backpack. “Because it would be okay if you were not. If you need a break or anything.” Kylo heard himself reassure her, while he tried to reach out his hand until Matt came into the room.

“Are you guys ready?” not knowing why Kylo shot him an angry look, the older one just shrugged his shoulders and waited that they would follow.

Giving Kylo a weak smile she left the room while he only huffed and clenched his jaw, following.

Occupying the last free corner of the cargo bed, Y/N pressed her backpack against her chest. She felt ashamed and exhausted, but also glad that Kylo was the only one who saw her in this state.

She wouldn´t want to scare Ben away or worse scare him even more then he already was.

What would even happen if they arrived at the CDC, would they be separated? Would she be all alone?

When Kylo checked the house one last time, he sighed and pulled the front door shut. Just a few more hours and they would be safe. He repeated in his mind and walked towards the truck, where he saw Ben struggling to climb up the trunk.

Grabbing him under his arms, Kylo quickly brought him to the drivers cabin.

“Hey! I wanted to play with Y/N!” Ben protested and looked angry at his older brother.

“Not now, buddy. She needs time for herself right now, okay?”

“Aha and why are you waddling back to her?” the younger one immediately asked when Kylo tried to sneak back.

“Thats an Adult Thing you wouldn´t understand.” Kylo mumbled while rolling his Eyes. Kids really couldn´t stop ask question when it was important. But he knew the little one wouldn´t let it go.

“Okay you know what? How about ….” he pulled a small bag out of his backpack. “-some cookies and we let it be for now, yeah?”

Looking at the Cookies, Ben slowly reached for them and looked at his older brothers. “How about those twinkies you still have left?”

Kylo squinted his eyes in suspicion, before he let out a low growl and fished the two sweets out of his bag.

“Getting really brave, aren´t we?” he hissed, but put the snacks in the outstretched hand of his baby brother.

“Well we all know where he got it from.” Matt suddenly joined the conversation.

“Har Har.” Kylo scoffed with a smirk before shutting the passenger door. Hopping onto the cargo bed, the Truck soon came into motion.

Normally Kylo would take this time, to check the weapons, but he remembered Y/Ns word from yesterday.

-Remember to take a break from time to time. You still owe me a concert.-

Grabbing his Guitar Bag he looked over to the girl who was still pressing her face into her crossed arms, which were laying on her knees.

Pulling on the strings, he thought of a melody he could play and slowly but surely his fingers were dancing over the instrument.

Raising her head the slightest she looked over to him, recognizing the familiar tune he was playing. Y/N had heard this melody so often at night, it was almost like her lullaby.

Risking a short glance over to her, Kylo was relieved to see her genuine and relaxed smile and repeated to play the song again.

Directing her gaze at the sky, she enjoyed the sun that was glittering through the leaves and warmed up her skin while enjoying Kylos play.

 

When Night time hit, they got to the first place they could find, which was a Motel at a small Highway. It took them longer then expected, since they needed to avoid crashed cars on the road and a few biters.

“I go look around. Park around the back so no one sees our car from the street.” Kylo hopped down and grabbed his gun. Y/N following closely, Knife ready.

While Matt drove the Truck around, Kylo and her made their way quietly to the reception. “Wait…” she whispered when Kylo placed his hand on the doorknob.

“They react more to sound then anything.” slightly raising her hand to knock on the glas, they soon heard the familiar gurgling and hissing until they saw the cause of it. Running against the glas and banging the door Kylo looked down at Y/N who nodded.

Opening the door just a smidge, the Biter stumbled to the door, trying to get out but she rammed her knife down in his skull and the twitching stopped.

“Good Teamwork.”

“Like always.” Both of them smirked at each other, sneaking into the reception to find the keys to the rooms.

“I can´t believe they were totally booked out before it all went down.” Y/N mumbled quietly while searching the desk for the master keys.

“Probably to find shelter, like we do.” rummaging through the office, Kylo looked around for something useful.

“Gottem!” she called over and Kylo nodded.

“Let´s find a room first. But we need to be careful. I´ll cover you from behind.” readying his gun he looked around the parking lot, while Y/N knocked on the first door, laying her ear on the cold wood.

Finding the right key she unlocked the door and a loud gasp escaped her mouth.  
“What?” Kylo quickly looked over his shoulder. After he followed her into the room he saw what scared her.

“Poor Bastard.” looking at the biter who tried to reach for them, he only shook his head.

“He got bitten…” Y/N noticed the ripped flesh on his arm. “And just quickened the process.” Kylo inspected the noose around the mens neck, while he was dangling from the ceiling.

“I take care of it, I´m at least able to reach.” he grinned to her and she shook her head.

“Are you implying that I am to short?” she suddenly asked and he only shrugged with his shoulders.

“Yeah yeah..” turning around she waved dismissively with her hand.

After clearing up every room, just to be safe, they decided on the cleanest one for this night.

“It´s getting colder, don´t you think?” Y/N asked Kylo while they waited for Matt and Ben outside the room.

“Yeah, let´s just hope everything goes the way it should tomorrow.” looking up at the stars he sighed. Laying a hand on his upper arms, she squeezed it lightly and smiled up to him. He ruffled through her hair before the others finally appeared.

While they returned into the room, Y/N took one last look at the woods nearby. She had the feeling as if someones was watching them, but it was probably just her paranoia getting the best of her.

Enjoying a spare meal of instant soups and their last slices of bread, the four of them tried to fit into the bed.

It took them awhile, but at some point they figured something out that would fit all of them, even though it was quiet packed.

Y/N needed to lay her legs over Matts, her head resting on Kylos chest. While Ben had to lay on her and she wrapped her arms protectivley around him. Even though it looked not very comfortable it was quite the opposite, probably because they had learned to trust and care for each other so much that they found so much comfort in each others presence at night.

“Can you tell me a story?” Ben mumbled, tired but not yet ready to fall asleep. The two older brothers, quickly making up an adventure about a mouse who needed to escape from his prison cell to find his love and defeat the rat king.

Listening to the story and laughing about the silly voices they made, Ben fell soon asleep, followed by Y/N.

It was a tiring Night, since the Motel wasn´t provided with any source of electricity any more and the heating system didn´t work, they all had to snuggle up to stay warm.

Ben was the only one who suffered the next morning with a stuffy nose. The others were exhausted but powered through in hopes they would be safe in a few hours.

 

“How should we proceed?” Y/N asked while looking at the Map from Atlanta they took from the Motel.

“The Main Roads will be dangerous right?”

All of them were together in the drivers cabin, Ben on Kylos Lap, while the rain was hindering their view of the road.

“We get as close as possible and see if we can get through.” Kylo mumbled but his leg was shaking nervously.

“I … just don´to want to get my hopes up to much.” he explained when he noticed her worried look.

“Me neither…” Y/N nodded.

When they arrived at the edge of the city, the streets seemed empty, no biters or people in sight. Sitting Ben down onto Y/N lap, Kylo and her changed places, so he was able to shoot out the window if it would be necessary.

But it wouldn´t be, they made their way through the streets without any incidents and soon were near the CDC.

“Shouldn´t their be at least someone who would greet us?” Matt suddenly realized while they drove by a few military vehicles.

“This is a freaking ghost town …” Y/N agreed, her gaze wandering over the tall buildings, not spotting anything or anyone.

“Maybe the Military got the Biters under control?” Matt suddenly asked but Kylo shook his head, reloading his rifle.

“No, something is definitely wrong.”

Getting closer to their destination everyone felt their stomach turn. It was a blood bath, bodys lying everywhere in front of the huge building.

“Kylo?” laying her hand onto his, Y/N looked up at him. His lip quivered in anger.

“We go in and look for survivors.” he said through gritted teeth.

Sneaking through the hallways, Kylo was in the front, Y/N and Ben following closely while Matt was in the back.

Their clothes were drenched from the heavy rain that had poured onto them and they needed to be careful not to slip on the floor.

Suddenly, Ben started to scream when a hand had grabbed his ankle. Quickly reacting, Y/N pulled him away and stomped with her foot on the biters head before she pushed her knife into his eye socket until the corpse wasn´t moving any more.

“Are you okay? Show me your leg!” Y/N pulled the trousers up but sighed in relief. Ben wasn´t hurt.

“Come here I´ll carry you…”but as soon as she took the little boy in her Arms a door in the back was pushed open and a figure stumbled out, raising a gun at them.

Kylo returned the gesture and blocked the others.

“Kids?”

It was Han, who immediately let his weapon sink and tied to made his way over to them.

“Not one step closer!” Kylo shouted , his weapon still aimed at his father.

“Kylo what are you doing?!” Matt tried to push the weapon aside and walk to his father but Kylo quickly stopped him.

“You are fucking bitten, aren´t you?!” he screamed at Han, frustrated, disappointed and devastated.

Han stopped in his tracks and only showed them a sad smile.


	7. Let the Past die

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Apr 2nd, 2018

“We will get you out of here, old man!” Kylo grunted under Hans weight, while Matt tried to support his father from the other side.

“Stop boys. it´s to late…” Han tried to pursued them. Y/N, who was in the front to open the doors for them and getting rid of everything that would stand in their way, tried to pull Ben behind her. She could hear in Hans voice how much he was in pain.

“No! We get you out of here! And we will get you to Mum and they will have a cure and it will be fine!” Kylo immediately argued and dragged his father further.

“Kylo!” Han´s voice was weak but with such a stern tone that his sons stopped.

“Just put me down somewhere, please.”

Quickly checking the rooms, Ben and Y/N guided them into what seemed like a first aid room.

Carrying Han over to the examination table, the two older boys tried to lift him onto it, while Y/N was looking in the cabinets for something that would ease the pain of the man.

Ben was standing in a corner, shaking and not able to comprehend the situation. He knew that a bite never meant anything good, but in his little mind he still couldn´t understand what was going to happen with his father.

Matt, who´s hands were just shaking as much as Ben´s were, let himself slowly sink next to his little brother who he pulled into his arms to calm him.

Kylo quickly closed the curtains around the bed, while Y/N let everything useful she could find fall onto the metallic instrument table.

Looking at the small bottles with different labels, she bit her lip, not any of the names on the labels made any sense to her.

Mumbling the words to herself, Y/N tried to connect the dots and felt the panic rise in her stomach, her hands started to tremble.

A large Hand suddenly laid heavy on hers and she looked up. It was Kylo, who seemed to be the calmest he had ever been in these last few days.

“The Hydromorphon, it should … help with the pain. At least most of it.” his voice was quiet, but steady, calming even.

“H…How much?” she sniffled, brushing the overflowing tears away and took a syringe to extract some of the transparent liquid.

“10 millilitres should do.” they heard Matt´s muffled voice and Y/N nodded. Rolling up Hans sleeve she prepared the syringe before injection the pain killer.

“You must be Y/N, right? Thanks for saving my son.” Han mumbled and she smiled weakly at him. “Well I´m thankful they saved me as well.”

Preparing a bowl of water, she started to dampen a cloth and dabbed the cold cloth against his burning forehead.

Kylo just stood there, watching her, lost and not able to move a muscle. She was so caring, even though she didn´t even know his father and what did he do, stand around like an idiot, his legs heavy like cement.

“I will clean your wound now.” she explained to the elder man, but Han only shook his head.

“No, don´t waste that good stuff on a lost cause.” he explained with a rusty voice before he violently started to cough and she quickly brought him water to drink.

“The only thing that you need to take care of is when I´m gone that you…” he stopped mid sentence, not wanting to put into words what horrible thing he was demanding from his son

She looked towards Kylo, whose eyes had widened in shock, instinctively gripping the handle of his knife.

Seeing his hand shake, she almost couldn´t believe that it was Kylo who was standing in front of her. Never in this whole time had she seen him this terrified and lost before.

“Would you excuse us for a moment?” pulling Kylo further away from them, he didn´t even fight it, she laid a hand onto his trembling one. Loosening his grip, she slowly took the knife from his hands.

“I´ll do it…” he heard her whisper and his eyes immediately shot up to meet hers. Confused about her words his eyebrows furrowed, not understanding why she would offer this to him.

Gently resting her Hand against his cheek, he closed his eyes for a moment. Her small hand felt so warm against his cold skin, it was so comforting that a small shiver run down his spine.

“You did the same for me.”

Taking in a shaky breath, he slowly sunk his head onto her shoulder before he nodded the slightest. Wrapping her Arms around his large torso, Y/N gave him a moment to calm down, letting her hands run up and down his back.

“Kylo? You need to let Ben say his Goodbyes to your father.” lifting his head up, he noticed her sad look and agreed without questioning her request.

It was one thing that he took from her, even if it wasn´t intentional and only for the sake of getting her out of harms way, but he stole her the opportunity to have closer over the death of her parents.

“You´re right.”

He wasn´t crying and the shaking had stopped but she knew that he was on the edge right now.

Hearing Han cough again, they quickly returned and Y/N tried to help the older man to calm down.

“You need to leave, if the horde comes back your will not be able to get out.” “Horde?” all of them asked in union and Hand nodded weak, his face pale and covered in sweat from the high fever from the infection.

“Thats how it happened, they were hundreds, maybe even thousands of those things. They overrun us like a wave.”

They remembered all the ripped apart bodys outside and Kylo swallowed heavy. “We won´t leave you here, Dad.” he assured his father and Matt came through the curtain.

“I have an idea.” he mumbled, placing his glasses back on his nose after he rubbed his tears away.

Pushing them on the other side of the bed, so that Ben wouldn´t be able to hear, the blonde lowered his voice.

“If… if we give Dad a small dose of anaesthesia, he would just fall a sleep and after that… after that…” he started to stutter and just felt quiet.

Y/N looked confused between the two brothers, but Kylo seemed to understand.

“You want to give him an overdose?”

His brother nodded and Kylo took a deep breath.

“Sounds like a good plan to me.” Han’s raspy voice reached them. “Dad…”

“It´s my decision Let me at least have that in my final moments.” he tried to smile at his older sons, but he only looked like he was in pain.

“You two should talk to Ben… I stay here with your father.” Y/N offered and tried to make Han presentably for his youngest son.

“I´m really thankful that you are there for them.” she heard him speak quietly and smiled sadly.

When she washed his face a second time he suddenly grabbed her hand. “There should still be Rations and Meds on the second floor, take everything with you and find a safe place as soon as possible.” he instructed her and she squeezed his hand gently.

“After we gave you a proper burial.” she nodded and he only chuckled lightly. “As stubborn as Kylo I see.”

When the three brothers returned she slowly retreated from the bed.

“I will give you a moment and check out the second floor.” getting the car keys from Matt, she left the room.

While she got the car, Y/N remembered what Han had said about the Horde. Now that she thought about it, after hers and Bens first encounter with the biters it was only logical that they would at some point just pile together into a big crowd. They were attracted by sound, what wasn´t an ideal situation but could be used as an advantage for traps against them.

Luckily the biter they encountered before meeting Han, was what seemed to be only undead left in the building.

It wasn´t hard to find the things Han had told her about, getting everything she could find onto the truck Y/N made sure to leave space so that they could transport his body to a more suiting place.

Grabbing some dry sweatshirts from what seemed to be a resting area, she slowly returned to the infirmary.

When she wanted to knock at the door, Matt suddenly stood in the Frame with a crying Ben on his Arm. Taking a moment to hug both of them Y/N gave each of them a sweater, even if Ben would probably sink into it.

“Dry yourself up, the car is directly outside the doors.” she explained to Matt who sniffled.

She wished she could say something that would ease their pain, but there was nothing that would help and she knew that herself.

When she came into the room, Kylo was leaning against the wall, watching his father who was breathing heavily.

“Ready?” he asked, his voice deep and rough, the syringe with the anaesthesia in his hand.

“I think so …” when they returned next to Han´s bed, the old man couldn´t even speak any more in his weak form.

“It will stop hurting soon.” she promised and Han could only nod. Soon the medication started to work and put Han into a soft slumber.

Kylo who clenched his jaw, started to fill up the next syringe, the one that would end the life of his father.

Taking in a few deep breath, Y/n stretched her shaking hand out, but instead of handing over the instrument, Kylo grabbed her wrist and suddenly rammed the needle of the syringe into Han´s chest.

“Kylo!” she could only shriek in shock, while she watched Kylo injecting the deadly dose of Meds. Stumbling back against the wall, for a moment she thought the tall boy was about to pass out, before he emptied his stomach onto the floor.

“Why didn´t you just let me do it?!” still holding onto her wrist, Kylo pulled her down on the floor with him.

“I… didn´t want you to take that burden.”

Forcefully pushing her head against his shoulder, a sob escaped her throat. “But you did so much already …”

When Hans body started to twitch, Y/N pressed herself against Kylos Arm waiting for it to be over.

Slowly getting up on her shaking legs, she checked Hans neck for a pulse. Taking the knife out of her holster she held it closely to the nape of his neck.

She knew she wasn´t exactly killing him, but just a few minutes ago she was talking to this man.

While her hands started to shake again, Kylo tried to get on his feet again. “Y/N…”

Before he could stop her, she pressed the blade into his neck. Now she know how Kylo felt just a few moments ago, the nausea rising up her throat.

Holding onto the edge of the bed she squatted down next to it, closing her eyes and taking deep breath to calm her down, tears streaming down her cheeks.

“We..we really need to got.” Y/N sniffled through her sobs and started searching the drawers for something they could cover up the body.

Placing a white cloth over the lifeless body, she walked over to Kylo who was staring at the wall in front of him, not moving a muscle.

“Ky…Kylo please. We need to get out…” trying to get his attention, Y/N took his face gently in her hands and he finally looked up at her.

“Lets get you cleaned up´and take your father somewhere better, okay?” slowly nodding, he let her guide to the sink, were she cleaned first his face and then herself.

“I got us some dry sweatshirts.” after they changed she and Kylo transported Hans body to the Truck.

Matt sat on the passenger seat with Ben who was quietly sobbing against his older brothers chest, while Kylo joined his father on the cargo bed.

Y/N drove them out of the city, until Kylo knocked against the window in the back. She stopped the car and looked over to him, while he pointed to an area at the edge of a forest.

It took Kylos everything he had left in him to shovel this grave, but he insisted to do it on his own, letting his other brothers grieve and rest.

An hour or maybe two later, they all stood in front of the finished grave, Hans body lying under the pile of wet dirt.

Nobody said anything, they all just stood there in the rain, exchanging a bottle of whiskey between each other, while everyone took a sip, except for Ben who had the honor to spill some of it on the grave.

Kneeling down next to him, he gave his little brother one of the Dog Tags from his father. “Take good care of it until we meet Mum okay?” the small boy nodded, rubbing his snotty nose on his sleeve.

“Go with Matt. Get out of the rain.” Still holding onto the shovel, Kylo swiftly brushed over his eyes, before Matt took the tool from him.

“You should go too.” Kylo tried to order her but she only scoffed.

“I won´t let you be alone out here.”

Just standing quiet for a few moment, their hands brushed against each other and Kylo slowly run his fingers along her palm before they slipped through hers, she squeezed his hand lightly.

“Are you okay?” she asked in a whisper.

Chugging down the rest of the bottle, Kylo looked to a biter who stumbled out of the woods.

“Let the past die. Kill it… if we have to.” he mumbled before throwing the empty bottle against the biters head who fell to the ground, hissing and growling as response.

Drenched from the rain, both of them soon started to shiver from the cold droplets that were running down their skins.

“Let´s get out of here…”

Tugging her after him, they soon left this place behind. Of to the unknown that would be on the end of those streets.


	8. Rest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Apr 7th, 2018

“How are you feeling, sweety?” brushing the sweat drenched hair from his forehead, Y/N looked down at Ben who was slightly whimpering.

“My head hurts…” he said with a strained voice and she could only sighed.

“I know sweetheart, you can rest soon. I promise you.” trying to cool him down with a wet cloth, she looked outside the car, waiting for the older brothers to return.

At the moment they were holding at the side of the road at a Rest Stop, while Matt and Kylo checked out the 3 small shops.

It might have been a month or more since they had left Atlanta, she couldn´t really tell anymore. Every day bled into another, without any hope of breaking this endless loop. The cold weather change didn´t help with that.

“I´ll get you another blanket. Be right back.” she promised the little boy.

“Am I gonna die?” he suddenly asked and she froze in place. “Of course not! Why would you think that…” gently stroking over his cheek, tears started to form in his eyes.

“Because Dad had this bad fever too.”

“Oh no honey, you´re just having a cold. You will soon be better.” placing a kiss on his forehead, she slowly left the drivers cabin to get the blanket and a bottle of water even though they had not much left.

Hearing a twig snap, she immediately pulled out her gun and pointed it at whatever was behind her, but the street was empty.

“Y/N? Everything alright?” she heard Kylo and Matt return, but didn´t turn back around to them.

“I thought I heard something…” taking another look at the trees on the other side of the street, she couldn´t make out anything suspicious.

Turning her attention to them she looked at the small bags. “Did you find anything?”

“Some food, we should be good for another few days. How is he?” Kylo asked taking a look into the cabin.

“We need to find a proper shelter, Kylo. The most important thing for him now is to rest and a proper and warm bed. More then anything else right now.” she sounded desperate and he saw the worry in her face.

“He just asked me if he is going to die…” Y/N whispered hushed.

“We really need to find a place to stay at least for two weeks until he gets better, please.”

Kylo bit his lip, before he nodded slowly. “At the next town I will get us a place to stay.” he finally said.

“I´ll help you.” she nodded and Kylo laid his hand onto her head with a small smirk.

“Wouldn´t have it any other way.”

 

It took them longer then they had wished for, Bens condition was bad and the shaking of the truck didn´t help that.

“Just a little more…” Y/N whispered calmly in Bens ear, while the boy was resting his head on her shoulder.

When the time came to inspect the houses, she wanted to lay him down on the cushioned seat again, but he wouldn´t let go of her.

“Please stay.”

Looking over to Kylo he shrugged his shoulders. “Stay.” he mouthed and she nodded, laying her arms around the small body on her lap.

Y/N had noticed that since Atlanta, Ben got clingy. Of course she didn´t mind it, she thought of him as her own little brother already. Even Kylo behaved more clingy then usual, sometimes more then Ben.

Helping the little boy to drink some water, the other two finally returned.

“We found a good one. Sorry it took so long, we prepared a room already were Ben can rest.”

Relieved she let them lead her into the house they picked.

“Did you find anything in the shops?” she asked while laying Ben down on one of the two mattresses they had placed on the floor.

“Just aspirin.” Matt answered and looked through the bags to give it to her.

“Do we have hot water here?”

The blonde nodded while adjusting his glasses. He hasn´t spoken a lot in the last few weeks and only mostly hung to the satellite phone, trying to reach for their mother.

”I´ll go look for better food for Ben.” and she was happy to see a small smile on his lips. “We even have electricity.” He said astound after connecting the phone to a socket.

“Don´t you want to take at least Kylo with you?” Y/N asked concerned but Matt only shook his head.

“He is better off here with you guys, really…” leaving without looking back, she sighed.

Focusing back on Ben, she smiled down at him.

“I´ll get you a bath ready, and after that -” “No don´t leave…” Ben croaked and quickly held onto her sleeve.

“Okay, then how about I read you something, hm?” seeing his nod, she searched her backpack and cuddled up next to him, pulling him in her arms.

“One sunny morning, in a little house somewhere deep in the Hundred-Acre Wood, a very round bear named Winnie the Pooh was touching his toes. He was breathing deeply when, all of a sudden, he felt his tummy rumble. -Oh my,- said Pooh. -This exercising is making me hungry.-” shortly after they adventure started, Kylo entered the room.

“Am I to late for storytime?” he asked and wanted to drop next to them, but Y/N stopped him.

“Can you fill up the bathtub for Ben?” “Oh sure.”

Retreating out of the room, she soon heard the water running. “Just this chapter and then Kylo will take a nice bath with you while I make you dinner.” Y/N suggested and Ben only agreed weakly.

Kylo came rushing back into the room, looking through their bags.

“What are you looking for?” she asked while putting the book down.

“The razor… or a very sharp knife…” he mumbled and Y/N slightly tilted her head. “You want to shave again?”

Looking over his shoulder he smirked. “What? You don´t like that idea?”

Helping Ben up she supported his every step towards the bathroom, but stopped infront of Kylo.

“I like your stubble.” Y/N admitted, scratching his chin, while he starred into her eyes.

-A literally puppy.- she thought.

Closing the water tab, she carefully sat Ben on the Rug in the Bathroom, Kylo had followed closely.

“So… I let you two enjoy your bath..”

“Sure you don´t wanna join?”Kylo was just pulling his sweatshirt over his head and she only rolled her eyes with a grin.

“You wish!” Y/N shouted over her shoulder before she slandered down the stairs into the big kitchen.

 

“Matt?” waiting for an answer she searched the cabinets and the fridge.

“I´m okay. Almost done looking around.” he answered after a while and she was more then relieved. “On second thought I think I look around a little more…” she heard him suddenly say through the walkie talkie and raised a brow.

“Are you sure? It will be dawn soon. We can look around together, tomorrow.” Y/N suggested but he avoided her question and didn´t bother to answer.

It would be best to talk with Kylo about the behaviour of the oldest brother, but at the moment the lunch for Ben was more important so he could finally get rid of this cold.

Balancing the plates with food up the stairs, she tried to think of a way to bring this conversation up.

“Hold still you little…” Kylo was trying to rub the hair of his little brother dry, who was sitting in his lap.

Shaking her Head, Y/N placed the plates on a small table. “How about you guys eat and I dry your hairs, because you can´t seem to even dry your own hair.” she sighed, seeing that Kylos hair was still dripping wet.

Letting the boys eat, she first combed through Bens Hair and dried it, before cuddling him in a blanket. Then she sat behind Kylo and combed through the rather long black hair and tried to press out the excessive water with a towel.

“I could really get used to this.” he chuckled lightly, leaning his head back to look at her.

“So you want to be treated like Ben? Like a child?”

“What?! No!” he argued but she only laughed.

“I´m just messing with you.”she ruffled through his hair. Looking over to Ben who seemed to slighlty dose off, his head hanging dangerously low over the rest of his food.

“I got him…” Kylo mumbled quickly, still with the fork in his mouth, carefully carrying Ben back over to the mattress, tucking him in.

“Kylo?” sitting down next to him she nervously started to fiddle with her fingers.

“Hey, everything okay?” laying one of his big hand onto hers his brows furrowed in worry.

“I´m just worried about Matt. He seems so distant at the moment. And earlier he just changed his mind and… it felt like he didn´t even want to come back.” since Kylo was holding her hand, she started to play with his fingers instead of her own. She still couldn´t get a hold of this nervous tick.

“Yeah I noticed it too. He just needs more time to … adjust I guess.”he suggested and watched her tracing the scar on his wrist with her fingertips.

“Sorry for the scar.” Y/N sighed. “Don´t worry about it.”

Biting her lip, her head hung low.

“I think he is avoiding me in particular…” she explained her worries honestly, feeling Kylos hand under her chin.

“It´s not your fault what happened. It was nobodys fault.” carefully pressing her chin up so that she would look at him, Kylo showed one of his rather rare genuine smiles.

“Matt is a Loner. Has always been. If the time is right he will come to us to talk.” reassuring her, Kylo let his eyes wander over her every facial future.

She looked tired, the dark circles under her eyes becoming more prominent day by day. Skin paler then usual, probably because of the cold weather and lack of sleep and no proper meal in days.

“Kylo, you´re staring…” she informed him and he blinked out of his daze. With a chuckle she sunk onto the mattress and looked at the ceiling.

Feeling the mattress dip under Kylos weight, he soon laid beside her. “Don´t you think it´s strange?”

“Mhmm?” he hummed.

Rolling onto her side she looked at him, their fingers still holding onto each other.

“That we never met any survivors. Not one.” turning his head towards her, he furrowed his brows.

“Well, we never been inside the citys. Always kept on the outside and never staid for long.”

he shrugged with his shoulders. Kylo couldn´t care less about other survivors, the only thing important to him were his brothers and her.

“Do you want to look for someone?” he asked after awhile. For a moment she thought about his question, shaking her head lightly as an answer.

“There is no one left to look for When we saw Washington, I knew that…” she sighed and shook her head again. “All I need is you, Ben and Matt. I feel… at home when we are together.”

Kylo leaned onto his Arm, smiling down at her.

Trying to find a suitable answer, they were suddenly interrupted by Y/N rumbling stomach.

Both of them started to laugh until they shushed each other simultaneously, which made them giggle even more. But luckily Ben remained in his deep slumber.

“Stay. Time for me to repay you. You did enough for us in the last few weeks.” Kylo stated while he stood up and grabbed the empty plates to return into the kitchen.

Looking after him, she couldn´t help the smirk on her lips. It was the first time that she had heard him laugh again after all that had happened and she wanted too keep it like this.

When he returned with her food, she continued to make bad jokes that would definitely make him laugh and told him embarrassing child hood storys.

“- and then I just poured all of the salt in the pancake batter, because I thought it was sugar. After that, we banished Pancakes for at least a few month.” she giggled.

“God what would I give for some pancakes right now.” Kylo chuckled as well.

“I would need to improvise a little, but I think I could make us some.”

Hearing a sudden tumult downstairs, both of them indistinctly grabbed their knifes.

“Jesus Christ!…” they heard Matt shriek in fear, before he stumbled into the bedroom.

“What happened?” Kylo and Y/N asked with confusion, Matt cleared his throat while avoiding their eyes.

Looking at each other, before returning their Eyes to Matt they both smirked at him.

“I got scared of the mop and fell over it…” he mumbled quietly but they could hear him loud and clearly.

Starting to laugh again, Matt only shook his head while dropping his bags.

“I made lunch, should I grab you some?” she asked the blonde and Matt slowly looked over to her.

“Sure, thanks…” he mumbled before occupying the bathroom.

It was the first afternoon in a while were they could truly relax and enjoy themselves after everything bad that had happened to them.

When Ben woke up he confirmed that he was feeling a lot better, which give them all a little bit more hope for the new days to come.


	9. Treehouse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Apr 13th, 2018

It took Ben over a week to get back on his feet. Of course he hated staying inside for his recovery but they soon found something that would take his mind of it, when Y/N found an unused notebook and glue.

“You can put all the pictures you took in it, instead of your comics. So they don´t get lost.” she explained to him, but he seemed concerned.

“I don´t have much films left…” the small boy admitted and looked ashamed, that he wasted so much already.

Pressing a kiss on his scalp she smiled down at him. “I will look for some on my run today.”

She saw his eyes lighten up and ruffled through his hair before she joined the others downstairs.

“I will be off. It could take some time, because I will look for some stuff for Ben.” closing the new red parka she had found, she started to check her stuff before shouldering her backpack.

“You sure you want to go alone?” Kylo asked, laying on the big couch in the living room.

“I will be fine. Because I had a very good teacher in murdering the undead.” patting his head, he only huffed.

Watching her leave, Kylo sighed and Matt could only scoff.

“Be careful, you are starting to drool.” the older brother said when the front door closed and Kylo immediately shot him an angry glare.

“What was that?” the black haired boy growled, but Matt only laughed.

“Oh little brother, you are so obvious. I´m still wondering how Y/N still hasn´t noticed you staring at her.”

Kylo adjusted his position, a small grin on his lips.

“Oh she knows, alright.”

“So what is your plan then? Crushing on her from a far, like you did the last half year?” pushing himself up from the comfortable couch, Kylo slandered over to his older brother. “Who told you that?”

“Mom, of course. And she told me of your song writing…” Matt smiled spiteful.

“Okay let me stop you right there, we are not talking about this ever again, do you understand?” Kylo hissed with a low voice, while Matt was focussing on the radio he was trying to modify.

“Or what?”

Shaking his head in disbelieve at this unexpected question, Kylo looked at his older brother. “What is wrong with you lately? You are acting like a little bitch…”

Suddenly Matt slammed his Screwdriver onto the counter. “Whats wrong with me?! Our live is in pieces! Our Dad just died, killed by her hands and here you are trying to play family!”

Kylo started to laugh, which made Matt even angrier.

“She didn´t kill him. I killed him and if I remember correctly it was your idea to do it that way. So we are all the same fucking guilty. So don´t act all mighty and innocent!” sighing, Kylo ruffled through his black hair before, taking his jacket.

“Listen, I don´t wanna fight, we only have each other left.”

Matt looked at his Hands and nodded. “Wow normally you would have gone berserk.” he admitted and Kylo chuckled lightly.

“She has a good influence on me.” shrugging with his shoulders, Kylo left the house.

Of course he wasn´t calm at all. Kicking everything in his way, before the noticed the noticeable red parka in the supermarket.

“It´s me!” he called into the almost empty story. “Kylo! I told you I can go alone.” she sighed but smiled up at him.

“I just needed to get out of the house.” Kylo sighed and looked down at her hand who clung to the hem of his sweatshirt.

“Are you alright?” she asked while slowly pulling him to the counter, which he endured with a smirk.

“I´m just fine.” Kylo wanted to place his hands onto her hips, but she was to quick and ducked under his arms.

“I got you something. Can you use them?” she threw a small package in his arms and looked excited at his face, waiting for his reaction.

Taking a closer look at the guitar strips, he didn´t even know what to say and that such a little thing could light up his mood.

“These are perfect.”

Giggling to herself, she was glad that he liked her little surprise. “And I found something else in the….” stopping Mid sentence, Kylo followed her gaze and quickly jumped over the counter, to push her down.

“Th…Thats … Thats a freaking herd outside, isn´t it`?!” she shout whispered while Kylo held her close against his chest.

“Yes it fucking is … but still smaller then what Dad had told us about. Just about a hundred maybe.” looking over the edge of the counter, he could see the group of undead slowly making their way towards them.

“For now we are safe. We are lucky they can´t open doors.” he said sarcastically through gritted teeth..

“What about Ben and Matt?”

Taking a closer look at what was around them, Kylo noticed the Personal Only door. “Where does this lead?”

Slowly crawling over to the door, Y/N pushed it open and waved after her. Grabbing her backpack from the counter, Kylo followed quickly and the both of them ran to the open loading area of the store, hiding behind a few stack of boxes.

They run for the nearest car and hid behind it. “Okay, we go one street down, it doesn´t look like there are much of them there.” Kylo grabbed his knife and Y/N nodded while she shouldered her backpack.

“Now!”

Both of them ran as fast as their feet could take them, until there were 3 biters in their way.

“The one on the right is yours!” Kylo called over to Y/N and got the attention of the other biters. Ramming his knife in the closest one, Kylo struggled to pull it out of the skull again, giving the other one too much time to approach him.

“Get down!!”

Just in time, Kylo ducked, before Y/N smashed the biters head with a baseball bat.

“Where did you get that?”

“Found it on the ground! Does it matter?!” she shouted back, while the two of them started to sprint towards the next fence, but not before Kylo retrieved his knife.

When they arrived at the house, the doors and windows were barricaded.

“Seems like Matt had enough time to get them safe.” she said relieved, while Kylo quickly pulled her into the backyard.

Since they wouldn´t be able to get in the house themselves now, there was only one other option.

“Come here I boost you up!” standing under a big tree, she looked up at the treehouse that was in it.

Carefully standing on his folded hands, Kylo pushed her up so that she could open the latch and threw a rope ladder down to him.

Pulling him up, she retrieved the ladder and closed the latch, hearing a few biters nearby.

Both of them rolled onto their backs and tried to steady their breaths. Her lungs were burning from this exhaustion, her hands shaking while she pressed them onto her face.

How could she have been so stupid? How could she have thought that they would be safe? Just because they hadn´t dealt with lots of biters the last few days didn´t mean they wouldn´t have to deal with them again. This false sense of safety was the reason they were in this situation. She would have been overrun if it wouldn´t have been for Kylo.

Turning her head towards him he laid a hand onto her cheek.

“You ok?” Y/N slowly nodded to his question.

He carefully sat up, worried he would make too much sound and attracted unwanted guests, but the Treehouse was steady enough.

Risking a glance out the cut out window he looked over to the house, seeing Bens head pop up in the attic window.

“They are fine.” Kylo informed her and pointed toward Ben who was waving to them, Matt joining him soon.

“Thank god…” she sighed, still laying on the cold wooden floor.

Showing his two brothers a thumps up they nodded in understanding. He sat down next to her again and started to bite his lip.

“The only thing we can do right now is wait.” he thought out loud, but he didn´t expect it to take this long. It was already nighttime and they still could here the Undead passing trough the streets and gardens. Making it impossible to leave the Treehouse.

“This will be a cold night….” Y/N mumbled, pulling her legs against her chest.

“Doesn´t have to be.” Kylo stretched and yawned loudly. For a moment she didn´t get what he was implying until a little smirk appeared on her lips.

“Aw, does the big tough Kylo want to cuddle?” she asked in a cooing voice and he started to chuckle.

“You can freeze to death, for all I care.” he countered.

“Suuuure.” crawling over to him, she opened the zipper of his sweatshirt and snuggled up against his warm chest.

Closing the jacket behind her again, he gently sunk his chin onto her head.

“That´s better…” Y/N huffed relaxed and nuzzled her head in the nook of his neck.

“At least we have it warm now.” he tried to sound unimpressed, not knowing that she could hear is heartbeat knowing exactly that he was actually as nervous as she was.

“It´s sad actually…” she suddenly whispered and he tried to look down at her.

“What is?”

“If the world wouldn´t have ended, we still would only know each other as neighbours. Nothing more, maybe for the rest of our lives.” mumbling to herself, Kylo thought about it.

“No I don´t think so.”

Looking up at him, her eyes stared at him with curiosity.

For a moment he thought about the situation, the two of them were in just a few seconds ago. If he wouldn´t have gone out and saw her in the supermarket, she might have died without them knowing and if she wouldn´t have saved his head, he would have died without letting Y/N know how he felt about her. When did it start to feel like she was family? And then, not like family at all?

Even though he didn´t want to tell her this, the words came out before he could stop himself.

“At some point, this neighbour of yours, who always kept you awake with his guitar play, would have asked you to prom. Probably.”

For a short moment her cheeks started to blush and she felt the heat rising up her face, before her brows narrowed.

“Don´t mess with me!” seeing his smirk she pouted.

“I´m not.” he suddenly got serious and leaned his forehead against hers.

“Is that so?” still mistrusting his words, she glanced into his brown eyes.

“Obviouisly. We would have gotten you a nice dress. Letting our Parents take embarrassing pictures of us, would have abandoned the prom after half an hour, because they are fucking overrated and dumb. So we would have enjoyed the best burgers in town in our fancy clothes instead.”

Listening to his words she slowly let her head sink against his chest again, while wrapping her arms around his torso.

“It would have been a nice date.” she agreed quietly, her lids getting heavier.

When she closed her eyes, she could barely feel Kylos lips grazing over her forehead.

 

Twitching out of his dreamless sleep, Kylo quickly looked around to determine where he was until he felt something heavy on him.

Y/N, her Arms still holding onto him, slept calm and quietly, while his heartbeat started to beat faster.

Glancing out the small window of the treehouse, he almost jumped at the realisation that it was already bright outside.

“Y/N… wake up.” gently shaking her shoulder she started to growl and pressed her face against his shirt.

“Five more minutes…” he heard her mumble and smiled to himself.

Clearing his throat, he shook her a little more sternly.

“I´m awake! I´m awake …” she almost shouted and rubbed over her eyes to get the sleepiness out of them.

“Did something happened?” opening the jacket, so that she could sit up, he shook his head.

“Not yet, but we should check with my brothers.”

When the coast was clear, he carefully let her sink down to the ground while holding onto her arms..

“Don´t forget my bat!” Y/N called up to him and caught the wooden sports instrument.

“Your new best friend?” Kylo asked her, after he had jumped down next to her.

“Maybe.” she grinned at him and made her way to the open window, where Matt waited.

Shocked she looked at the smaller boy, who had a big bruise on his temple.

“What happened to you Ben?” getting a closer look at the wound, Y/N brushed Bens thick hair aside.

“One of the monsters came up.” Ben mumbled quietly and Kylo immediately shot a furious glance at Matt.

“How could you let this happen?!” he hissed at his older brother.

“Kylo, stop!” Y/N interrupted the fight that was about to start. “We need to get away from here and take as many supplies as we can! The Supermarket had still good stuff.”

Pulling out all the Maps they had gathered over the month she tried to find the town they were in.

Surprised she marked the way the horde went. “They are going south… Same as the herd your father described. So we should go-” “North.” Kylo finished her sentence.

“We need warmer clothes and as much food as we can carry.” she immediately mumbled to herself and Kylo knew she was probably making a check list in her head already.

“Look if there is a Gun or Hunting Shop in this place, we should stop there too.” Kylo added while throwing their clothing into the bags.

“Five blocks from here.” she marked the place on the Map and helped carrying the bags to the car.

After they took everything they could possibly use, they left the town without looking back.

Something they were so used to by now, endlessly wandering around on the search for a new home, since they didn´t know were to find the Solos mother.

Every try to make contact lead to nothing but losing hope that they ever would be safe.


	10. Traitor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Apr 20th, 2018

The leaves had started to change their colours, the roads they were on soon turned from green into orange, red and yellow hues.

Stretching in the rare sunlight, Y/N was trying to keep herself warm, while washing a few clothes in a nearby creek.

Listening to the silenced Gunshots nearby, it was a rather quiet day, even though it was not a planned rest.

When she returned to the Truck, Y/N saw Kylo and Ben nearby. The older brother had insisted on teaching the youngest how to handle a gun, after the incident in the last town.

They were lost since the Last few days and no direction were they should go to next.

Hanging the wet clothes on the side of the vehicle, she soon saw Matt returning with what seemed to be the awaited fuel for the Truck.

“How much did you get?” she asked, excited to hear some good news. But when Matt wanted to answer her question, his Eyes spotted his brothers and he just let the canister fall into her arms. Gasping under the sudden heavy burden she watched the blonde boy quickly making his way over to his brothers.

With a scoff, she turned back around to fill the Truck with the clear liquid so that they could continue their trip, until she heard a sudden tumult behind her.

Almost dropping the Canister, she only saw how Matt took a swing at Kylo which send him to the ground.

Placing the Canister down, she quickly ran towards the boys who were now fighting on the ground.

“Ben get in the car quick!” taking the gun from his small hands, she placed it in the back of her jeans, before Y/N tried to pull Matt away from Kylo.

“Stop it you two!! STOP!” getting pushed back by Matt, she landed on the ground.

“Why are you teaching him how to use a gun?! Do you want to that he will become like you?! A soldier? A killer?!” Matt shouted with every punch, which Kylo tried to avoid, but when he heard those last words from his brother something changed.

In one second Matt was the one who laid on the ground while Kylo let his fists fly down on him.

“Everything I did, was for our survival!!” now he was the one screaming, but much louder and frustrated.

“Mum will get as soon! He doesn´t need to learn that shit! He doesn´t need to end up as cold blooded as you!” Matt shouted back, trying to avert Kylos punches.

“Our Mother abandoned us! Since month she didn´t even try to contact us or answered our calls!! Get that in your genius head! What else are we supposed to do?! Lay down and just die?!” grabbing his older brother at his collar, Kylo was about to punch him right in the face.

“Kylo!” grabbing his wrist, Y/N tried to stop him and his head snapped in her direction. His breath was heavy until she laid one hand against his cheek and looked in to his eyes with a pleading look, he slowly calmed down.

Helping him up she looked down at Matt.

“What has gotten into you two?!” she couldn´t put in words how shocked she was from their behaviour.

“Ben needs to learn how to protect himself, if you are not even able to do it!” Kylo hissed dangerously low and Y/N quickly stood in front of him, her hands on his chest to keep him away from his older brother.

“If we don´t teach him how to defend himself, he will get torn apart by those things! We can´t always protect him… Don´t worry I will not make him into a murderer, like me…” clenching his fists, Kylo slowly walked back to the truck.

“Do you really think of him as a murderer?” Y/N asked calmly but also disappointed in Matt for letting such things cloud his judgement.

Thinking such a horrible thing about Kylo, who risked his live so often to safe theirs.

Not answering her question, she still tried to help him up, but he ignored her hand as well, before vanishing into the forest.

For a moment she just stood there, not knowing what she should do until she felt Kylos big Hand in hers.

“Do you think of me the same way?” his rough voice asked.

Looking into his eyes, she showed him an honest smile. “No. And I never would.”

His lips flinched in somewhat of a smirk, but if he would be honest Kylo was actually quiet relieved.

“Come on.” slowly tugging her along, like he always did, the two of them returned to the car.

Ben, who was playing with his astronaut, looked out of the drivers cabin.

“You did the right thing. Teaching him, I mean. If you wouldn´t have shown me how to fight, I wouldn´t be alive.”

Stopping, she looked over her shoulder were Matt vanished.

“Do you want to go after him?”

“No, we would probably just bash our heads in.” he admitted and grabbed the axe from the trunk.

“I get the campfire ready, would you take care of the traps?” nodding, she got Ben out of the cabin to help her.

 

It was already dark, when the three of them sat near the fire to warm themselves. “Matt is still out there. Do you think something happened?” Y/N whispered so that Ben wouldn´t hear.

Kylo didn´t answer her, but she knew he was as worried as she was about the oldest Solo.

Leaning her head against his shoulder, she took a deep breath while Kylo was about to lay his arm around her but got interrupted.

“Can we eat soon?” Ben looked at the two and Y/N stroke through his hair, noticing that it already grew a bit longer.

“Sure. I look what we have.” making her way over to the truck, she soon rummaged through their bags. Looking for something she could use on the campfire, so they at least could enjoy a hot meal, when she suddenly got interrupted by an unfamiliar voice.

“Hello sweet little kitten!” trying to grab her bat next to the bag she was searching, her Arm got quickly twisted behind her back, which made her grunt in pain.

“Come on, sweetpea. The Boss wants to see you.” getting pushed back to the campfire were Kylo and Ben were already pressed in the ground.

“Get your hands off of her!!” she could hear Kylos muffled scream and saw him struggle against the foot on his back.

Five, no Seven people, were standing around the fire. Two were holding down Kylo. One was occupied with Ben, while another was still holding on to her. Another two were just standing next to another guy who had his arm around Matt.

“What the hell is going on?” Y/N asked, confused about who these people were and what they wanted from them.

“Even more gorgeous up close.” The man next to Matt sighed in admiration, before he made his way over to Y/N.

Grabbing her by her chin, he inspected her face closer.

“Get your dirty hands off her or I rip your throat out!” Kylo immediately growled and tried to push himself up, before getting kicked to the ground again.

“Leave him alone!” she screamed and tried to kick the guys that were hurting Kylo.

“Ohh, I see how it is. The big Daddy Killer who wants to keep the kitten all for himself. Sharing is caring, you know?” stroking over Y/N cheek, she spit in the mans face.

“Fuck off you damn pervert.” she hissed.

“Oh feisty, aren´t we sweetheart?” the man grinned and wished the spit out of his face before the back of his hand collided with Y/N´s cheek.

“You Fucker!!” Kylo tried to get free again, but got kicked in the side again.

“Please stop! You said you won´t hurt them!” Matt suddenly stated and all of them looked over to him.

Kylos body froze, not believing the words that just came out of his brothers mouth.

“YOU FUCKING TRAITOR!” it seemed like this sudden realisation, gave Kylo a boost of strength then he threw the guy next to him on his back before slamming his fist in the others stomach.

Hearing Y/Ns painful wince he stopped mid motion and saw how that disgusting bastard was holding a knife to her throat.

“One more move …”

In the next moment, Kylo was first kicked in his stomach and then pushed down in the dirt again.

“Don´t hurt him! Please!” she whispered, tears in her eyes.

“Would you look at that, Daddy Killer. Our little kitten seems to actually care for you.”

The guy pushed Y/N on the ground, in front of Kylo, before grabbing her hair and pulling her head back.

“Kylo?” she was scared, even more then the night she lost her parents. Who knew what these mans were capable to do?

“I´m sorry…” trying to stretch his hand out to her, the what seemed to be the leader, stepped onto it, making Kylo hiss in pain.

Desperate she looked over to Matt who seemed to be in a state of shock. Why would he betray them like this?

Following her look the boss sat squatted down next to her. “You know, we actually wanted to take everyone of you in. But then our boy Matty told us the things about his brother. So we kept our distance and your sweet little Matt, brought us food and everything else we needed.”

Thinking back, it now made so much sense why their rations were slimming so quickly, why the gas sometimes run out quicker then expected and why Matt had spend so much time away from them.

“But now…. We got what we came for and don´t need your hostility any more. Leave the boys here. Take their stuff.”

Pulling Y/N from the ground and dragging her after him, she suddenly realised what was about to happen.

“NO! You can´t separate us!!” “Oh Love. I just did. An d now be a good little kitten and follow.”

Screaming, cursing and kicking she tried to get away from this mans grip until she couldn´t even see the campfire any more and they stopped in front of a few cars.

Everything seemed now so obvious and she would slap herself for not noticing anything sooner, especially since she even recognised the vehicles now.

What could she do? If she could get the advantage on this guy, she maybe would be able to help Kylo and the rest.

“So what is the plan now?” she asked and he only smirked.

“Oh you will see, Love.” pressing his face into her hair he took a deep sniff and she would have gladly threw up in his face at that moment.

But to her surprise, the grip around her arm loosened a bit and she thought about what Kylo would do in this kind of situation.

-Fuck shit up.- was the first thing that came to her mind and in one moment she had grabbed the guys neck and threw his face into the side window of the car.

Screaming out in pain, the man clutched at his now bleeding face. She took that opening to turn around and run, but something heavy landed in her back which made her fall to the ground.

He had kicked her down, throwing her on her back and wrapping his hands around her neck.

This was it. This was the end.

Feeling a sharp pain, while he squeezed his hands tighter, Y/N gasped for air, unsuccessful. It wasn´t just his hands that he had wrapped around her, something was cutting in her skin and she instinctively tried to claw herself free.

She tried to loosen his hands but the wire he had put around her neck only got tighter.

Hearing the fast rushing blood through her ears, it soon turned into a high pitched tone which soon mixed with her rapid heartbeat.

Not being able to get any air in her lungs she soon started to gag while her hands fell next to her searching the ground desperately for something she could use against him.

Her fingers run over something sharp and quickly gripping it tightly. It was one of the glass shard from the shattered window.

The glass cut into the palm of her hand, but she didn´t care, if she would be able to get a hit on him she needed to hold it as tight as possible.

Faintly hearing a few gunshots nearby, the guy that sat onto her, redirecting his attention to the it she took that moment to ram the glass with every strength she had left into his shoulder.

“AH FUCK! You damn fucking Lunatic!!” while he screamed and tried to get the shard out of his shoulder, she ripped the wire from her neck and finally felt the air fill her lungs again.

As soon as she got a little bit of orientation back, Y/N tried to crawl away from him before he could attack her again, when suddenly someone rushed through the bushes.

It was Kylo, blood dripping down from his arms and from the machete he was holding. Letting his eyes wander over the situation he first noticed Y/N, her wounds and her shaking body pressed against a tree before he looked up at the guy that did this to her.

A shiver run down her spine when she saw how Kylos expression changed. His eyes screamed only one thing. Murder.

In the blink of an eye, he was standing in front of the man, grabbing his throat before ramming the machete into his chest. Twisting the blade, Kylo had a sinister grin on his lips.

Kylo opened his mouth to say something, but before he could the man pulled out the shard from his shoulder, swinging it at Kylos face, who only turned his head away while a deep cut showed up on his right side.

Looking shocked at the sight that was in front of her, Y/N tried to pull herself up to help him, but her legs gave out under her.

Suddenly Kylo only chuckled.

“I promised I was gonna rip your throat out.” with a swift motion, he pulled the blade out again before slicing the neck of that bastard, letting him choke on his own blood.

Getting onto her shaking feet, Y/N looked down at the dying man, not once averting her eyes from him until he took his last breath.

Turning her attention to Kylo, she noticed that his body was slightly starting to sway while he turned back around to her.

The blood from the freshly cut wound was dripping down his face and she probably should have been scared of him, at least that was his fear then his expression seemed pained and scared while he stretched his hand out to her.

“Please.” he pleaded, she didn´t waste a second to stumble into his arms.

“Are you alright?” he asked and she could feel his breath fan against her skin.

“I …” trying to speak, she couldn´t even get another word out, her throat hurt and her voice was hoarse and Kylo almost didn´t hear her.

Feeling his body slump onto her shoulders she tried to hold his weight.

“Kylo?” it only came out as a squeal, but panic started to rise up in her body.

Looking down at himself, she followed his gaze and saw the ripped shirt at his left side. Quickly pulling up his shirt were the blood already soaked through, she saw a wide shot wound.

“Well shit…” he only huffed before his body collapsed and slowly fell to the ground.


	11. Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Apr 27th, 2018

“No… nonono!” falling down next to him, Y/N looked panicked at the blood that was seeping through his shirt.

She tried to press her hands onto it, to put pressure on the wound, but soon the red liquid poured through her fingers.

When she tried to scream for Matt, it only came out as a high pitched whisper and she knew she was now on her own.

Averting her eyes from the blood, she let her gaze wander around the miserable campside.

Seeing some clothes hanging out one of the car windows, Y/N quickly got to it and ripped a few away, before returning to Kylo, who seemed to gain conscious again.

“Y/N?” he croaked and tried to look around.

“Shh, I´m here.” folding a flannel shirt she was pushing it on his wound, making Kylo grit his teeth.

“I´m sorry… I will get you somewhere safe! Just… just a bit longer.” ripping apart another shirt she wrapped it around his torso so she would be able to drag him back to their camp.

Suddenly feeling his hand cup her cheek, accidentally smearing his blood onto her face, she looked up to his pale face.

“You look beautiful when you are covered in my blood, you know that?” he smiled weakly and she couldn´t help a small chuckle escaping her lips, while she looked at that damn smirk of his.

“Idiot…tell me that again after I saved you, for now you need to keep your strength, okay?” correcting her improvised tourniquet, before looking up at him again, she saw that he had closed his eyes.

“Kylo?” in an attempt to hold back her tears, Y/N bit her trembling lip. Standing on her shaking legs, she grabbed him under his arms.

“You can´t die! You promised, remember?! You promised you won´t leave!” dragging his body over the ground, she tried to get him back to their campsite.

They needed to leave as soon as possible, so Kylo could get the medical attention that he needed.

But then what? What should she do? Looking at all the blood that was running down his side and his face, her mind was blank. Normally Kylo was the one who took lead in this kind of situations.

“You got to tell me what to do! You gotta wake up! Kylo!!” she whimpered desperately, until she heard Matts shouting. Risking a look over her shoulder she saw that Matt and Ben were still hold hostage by the only guy left from the troop, even tough he was badly beaten up.

Placing Kylo gently onto the ground, quietly stalking over to them with wide steps before grabbing a gun out of the dirt. When she stood behind the Man she pushed the Barrel of the Gun against his head, before pulling the trigger without hesitation.

“We need to get Kylo out of here. Now! Help me get him on the Truck.” she only said, while the dead body fell to the ground.

But Matt wasn´t moving a muscle and she got seriously impatient at this point. Slapping him across his face she grabbed him by his collar. “Snap out of it!” she wanted to scream at him, but it only sounded like a dangerous low whisper and it seemed like Matt finally got out of his shocked daze.

Placing Ben onto the cargo bed from their truck, she ordered him to look for their first aid stuff while she and Matt would bring Kylo over.

When they finally got his body onto the truck she quickly searched through their stuff to press a towel on Kylos shot wound.

“Ben, I need a needle and thread. And disinfection spray-”

“We just have the whiskey.” he explained to her, while handing her the things she had asked for. The small boy seemed oddly calm, but she saw how his hands were shaking and for a moment she couldn´t be more proud of him that he was trying to stay strong even though she could see the fear in his eyes.

While Matt went to search the other groups stuff, she would have time to stitch Kylo up. He wouldn´t die, not if she could prevent it.

Ripping apart Kylos shirt so she could get a better picture of the severity of his wounds, she stared at the long cut.

Pressing another towel against his side, she quickly sat on his torso, holding the towel with her thigh so that her hands were free.

She poured the brown liquid onto the cut on Kylos face, which gladly made him twitch lightly, it wasn´t much but at least he reacted somehow.

Pulling the thread through the needle she looked down at the clean cut, her hands were starting to shake even more and she needed a moment to calm herself down, grabbing the hand with the needle with her other hand to stop the trembling.

“Stay calm…” she whispered, more to herself then anyone.

Taking a deep breath again, she started to pull the needle through his pale skin, while trying to keep her hand steady.

It took longer then expected, the cut wasn´t only on his face but also stretched down his right shoulder.

When she finally could knot the thread, Y/N couldn´t put in words how relieved she was. This whole time she was scared that she would maybe, flinch, or rip the wound open again by accident.

Risking a glance at the shot wound, the bleeding had seemed to stop slightly and she was already preparing herself to stitch this wound shut as well, until she noticed that she wouldn´t be able to.

Matt who was rushing back to them, threw a few bags onto the car.

“What do you need? Y/N?!!” looking up at him in horror she shook her head.

“B…bandages…” Ben was the one who answered and started to carefully wrap at least the already cared for wound and Matt could see that he learned how to from watching Y/N.

“I will not be able to stitch this…I don´t know what to do!” she suddenly sobbed and let her head sink into her blood stained hands, smearing even more blood on her face and hair.

She felt so helpless without him.

“We need to cauterize it.” Matt suddenly suggested while climbing next to her.

“You want me to burn him?” she asked shocked but stopped crying.

“It´s our only chance, Y/N… His only chance!” pulling a camping stove out of a bag, he quickly lit the flame, while she looked down at Kylo, who´s breath was getting slower.

Cleaning up the machete, that Kylo still held onto, she gave it over to Matt who heated up the blade, while she loosened Kylos belt, placing the leather streak into his mouth.

“Ben hold his shoulders. Whatever you do, don´t let go…” she advised him, while taking the hot blade from Matt, who helped Ben.

“Ready?” she asked with a trembling voice and the boys nodded.

“I´m sorry….” pressing the blade onto the wound, Kylo started to scream and his back arched before his body automatically tried to get away from the burning weapon.

“Sorry… I´m so sorry…” she whimpered and mumbled those words down like a prayer, until Kylo stopped moving.

Quickly throwing the machete away she placed her ear against his chest, listening to his slow heartbeat. It seemed faint, but stable enough.

The stench of the burned flesh, made them all sick to their stomachs and Y/N couldn´t held it in any longer.

Immediately hanging over the edge she threw up onto the ground.

“Give me a clean bandage, we can´t let it get infected.” she mumbled, after wiping over her mouth with one of the bloody towels and threw it on the street.

Lifting Kylos hip slightly so they could wrap the bandage around his torso, she carefully loosened his jaw to free him from the belt in his mouth, wiping the drool away from his face.

Y/N would have never imagined to see Kylo this fragile and defeated, for her he always seemed like this indestructible force of nature.

Brushing the hair that was sticking to his forehead out of his face, she just couldn´t believe that he saved her life again, but this time he risked everything for her.

“You damn idiot…” she whispered.

Continuing to stroke through his hair, Matt got her attention again.

“We need to get him to a hospital.” Matt suggested and she looked confused up at him.

“Did you even hear yourself just now?” she asked and shook her head quickly.

“The hospitals are the most infested places and you know that! We need a place were he can rest, then I can make my way to a hospital. He needs blood, a lot of it…” gently stroking over Kylos cheek she sighed.

“I know a place. It´s near here. I saw a street sign, when… they suddenly appeared. I know were we are and can bring us there.”

“Alright…” she nodded and let Matt take over.

When she suddenly felt something wet against her cheek, she slowly lifted her gaze from Kylo and looked at Ben who was carefully brushing a wet cloth over her face to clean it from the blood.

“He will be fine, he is a fighter.” the small boy tried to encourage her and after he was done with her face, Ben continued to clean her arms.

“Thank you.” leaning her head against his, she soon closed him in her arms. Without letting go of Kylos wrist, were she checked his pulse, Y/N was caught up in her thoughts.

“Y/N, you are hurt too!” the small boy suddenly said and pointed at her throat.

“Oh, yeah … I already forgot about that. Don´t worry, I will take care of it…” letting her fingers run over the cut.

“Hold your fingers here on his wrist. If his pulse gets slower or stops, you tell me!” Ben nodded and focused onto Kylos Hand.

While she cleaned her neck and the cuts in her hand, she always risked a glance over to the unconscious body next to her.

After she wrapped a bandage clumsily around her neck, Matt was turning onto a Forest Path.

“So that place you were talking about …” she asked after opening the small window from the drivers cabin.

“Our uncles little hunting hut. At some point he just started living there. Said he had enough of humanity.” Matt explained and soon she saw the small wooden house, a dim light shining through the windows.

“What if it isn´t uncle Luke who is in there?” Ben suddenly asked and instinctively Y/N prepared her gun., filling the magazine with bullets.

“Then we hope they are friendly. If not…” Matt mumbled and Y/N clicked the Magazine into the gun.

“I kill them. I will not let anybody stop us from saving Kylo.” she ended his sentence through gritted teeth.

When she jumped down the Truck, the door of the Hut opened, ready to point her gun at whoever was coming out, an old mans voice suddenly echoed through the air.

“Matt, my boy, is that you?”

More then relieved, Y/N felt her legs starting to shake and almost fell to the ground but pulled herself together and quickly helped Matt to carry Kylos clam body inside.

The hut was basically just a big room, which was used as a living and bed room with a fireplace and a small kitchen. Y/N could also see a small hallway, which probably lead to a bathroom.

“What happened?” Luke asked shocked over the sight of one of his nephews covered in blood and seriously wounded.

“I don´t know if you noticed, but the world ended. An infection, it brings the dead back to life and turns them into cannibals.” Matt explained quickly and Luke only nodded slightly with furrowed eyebrows.

“I heard a little bit from the radio.” he admitted.

“We got attacked and …” suddenly stopping mid sentence he looked shocked at Y/N who was taking of her blood drenched clothes and was just standing in front of them in her underwear.

“What are you doing?!” the blonde asked, quickly avoiding his gaze from her.

“I don´t want the biters to smell me from a mile away, is all.” pulling fresh clothes over, she took the bags which Ben was dragging into the house. Taking her gun, Kylos rifle, Ammunition and of course her trusty bat, her hands rummaged hectic through the bags.

“Matt I need a map!” she lost her patience. Helping her search he soon unfolded the right one.

“We are around here.” marking a bit of forest on the map with a red circle he let his eyes wander over the paper.

“There! That is the nearest hospital.”

“Any chance I get there with the Truck?” she asked while closing the weapon holster around her hip.

“It´s not a big city but a bigger town. If you drive this route, you should be able to avoid anything that could be in your way.” Matt explained and marked the way.

“It should take you about an hour. Gathering the stuff we need… maybe another one. Until your back. That will be three hours.” he mumbled and looked over to his little brother.

“I´ll make it two. Only thing I need to know now, is his blood type. Please tell me you know it.” grabbing the car keys, she was about to shoulder her backpack.

“I …” Matt suddenly stammered. “I don´t know…”

“It´s O Negative.” looking over to Ben, they both were surprised. ”They wouldn´t let me give blood to him when he had that bike accident, because I have AB Positve.” the small boy remembered and Y/N could only hug him tightly.

“That helps a lot sweetheart.” pressing a kiss on his cheek, Ben only crunched up his nose.

Slowly making her way over to Kylo, who was lying on a small bed, she leaned over him before pressing her lips against his forehead.

“I will be back soon.” she whispered before gently ruffling through his hair one more time.

Helping Ben with the last bags from the Trucks, Matt handed her one of the walkies. “The hospital is about five miles out of our radius, but…”

Nodding she packed it onto her belt.

“I call as soon as I´m able too. I won´t let him die!” grabbing everything she needed, Y/N sprinted out of the hut.


	12. The Hospital

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Apr 30th, 2018

Pressing her foot down on the Gas Pedal, Y/N was probably driving too fast, but that was the least of her problems right now.

-If I don´t hurry, Kylo could …- she didn´t even want to finish that thought. This was his only chance of survival and she defiantly wouldn´t fuck that up.

Having the Map on the steering wheel while she was driving, Y/N checked the street signs to take the right route.

Suddenly kicking the brakes, the Truck came to a stop in front of a few fallen trees.

“Of fucking course!” Y/N grunted annoyed before reversing for a bit and drive off the road to avoid this obstacle.

Avoiding biters on her way she was almost near the hospital, she grabbed the walkie.

“Matt you hear me?”

“I´m here.” he answered her quickly, but she needed to listen carefully through the white noise.

“I´m almost there, how is he?” only hearing static as an answer she almost through the walkie on the floor.

Hanging it back on her belt she continued her drive through a field and soon saw the big white building in the distance.

Killing the lights quickly she saw the mess around the hospital. Biters were walking around the hospital and possible inside as well.

The inside of the building was dimly lit, with flickering lights here and there.

“Probably the emergency energy…” she mumbled while grabbing her things to leave the car.

Looking around, she saw a fire escape ladder were she would be able to climb up. Crouching through the tall grass, Y/N soon jumped up on the fence that was keeping her away from what she needed.

When she landed on the concrete floor she quickly grabed her bat and swung it, ready to take out the five undead that were approaching her.

Piling the undead bodys up, she used them as a step ladder to reach the first platform and pulled herself up onto it, just in time before another ten came around the corner.

“That will be harder then I thought…” she whispered to herself before risking a glance inside a lit window.

Biting her lips she was not expecting what she was now looking at. Dead bodys, probably executed by the government, were all over the floor and she could only shake her head while she quietly sneaked up the metal stairs outside the building.

If she could get onto the highest floor, there was maybe an opportunity to get rid of the biters inside and would stay out of danger herself.

“Finally…” after endless minutes, Y/N finally found a window that she was able to open without breaking it.

Carefully stepping into the dark room, she soon heard a familiar growling and tried to grabbed her blad, but the biter was already to close.

Being pushed down onto the cold ground, she tried to pull her arm with the knife up, to ram it into the monsters head, but her blade got caught in the wrinkly belly of the biter.

Desperately she held the snapping thing away from her before pulling her knife up with all her strength which made the insides of it´s stomach onto her chest.

Quickly slamming the knife in it´s head she kicked the dead body of her.

“Gosh this is so disgusting…” she gagged, but at the moment she couldn´t care less about her appearance.

Turning on her flashlight she looked around the room, which was filled with file cabinets. Patient files, to be exact.

“Jackpot, these will be helpful…” hearing a rattling outside, she slowly stalked to the door and opened it a smidge to look outside.

The hallway seemed to be clear, at least were she was, looking around the room one more time, she saw exactly what she needed.

Checking the Radio and CD Player if it had a CD and Batteries, she made her way outside into the hallway were she opened a window.

She grabbed tape from her backpack and hung the Player outside the window before starting to blast the music at the loudest volume before returning to the room she was in just a few seconds ago.

Soon Y/N could hear the footsteps approaching and knew that she needed to wait it out here, but she didn´t just wait around and didn´t waste the time.

Looking through the cabinets of patient files, she placed everything useful onto the desk. Any Patient that was similar to Kylos body type, ideal with his blood type and similar wounds, she put every file she could possibly carry into an empty bag she had brought with her.

Placing her ear on the door she heard no more footsteps or the familiar gurgling the biters let out. She risked a small glance outside and saw one stuck on the wall, stretching his arms out the window to follow the other. With one good punch with her bat, the undead fell out the window and landed on the pile on the asphalt ground.

“That must have been at least 50!” she couldn´t contain her excitement that her trap worked so well.

Slowly lifting her arm, she placed her hand onto her head were Kylo would normally ruffle through when he was trying to show how proud he was.

Biting her lip, she turned away from the window and made her way downstairs. After she had studied the floorplan, Y/N found the way to the blood storage quickly.

“O Negative.. O Nega… Aha!” looking at the bags in the flickering fridges, she finally found the right blood type.

Taking one of the bags out, she looked at the dark red liquid inside. “Looks… alright I guess.” she mumbled, but wasn´t sure how she should transport those fragile containers.

While she looked around she found other Bags with clear liquids, reading their labels she was sure they would be useful should Kylo not wake up immediately.

Grabbing one of the plastic cool bags from the shelf she put everything in it until it was full, placing a few cooling packs into it. Making her way into the supply room she packed everything useful into her backpack, bandages, a stetoscope, gloves, scissors, injection needles and tubes and as many sterile surgical kits she could carry.

Now the only thing left to do was to bring everything to the car and then to finally return to Kylo.

First she brought the Blood to the car, before she wanted to return to get the useful patient files she had gathered, when she heard that the CD Player was playing it´s last tunes.

Quietly climbing up on the fire escape again, she could hear the approaching biters who lost interesting since the loud noise was gone.

The bag was heavy and it wasn´t heavy to swing it over her shoulder, but she only needed to endure this heavy burden for a few more minutes.

Trying to climb the metallic ladder down as quick as possible she felt her shoe slip and soon landed with her back onto the ground, the impact pressing all the air she had left in her lungs out.

Trying to catch her breath she felt a hot pain rise from her right shoulder into the rest of her arm and chest. Letting out a painful scream, she tried to get up from the cold ground, but her arm didn´t want to move like she wanted to. Was it broken? No, it felt different, it wasn´t her arm that was hurt, it was her shoulder that was causing it. It was dislocated.

She could hear the biters coming nearer and the only thing she could do was to grab her knife with her left hand.

There were at least twenty of them. Why now?! She came so far!! Why did she ruin it at the last moment.

“I´m sorry… I tried.” she whispered while closing her eyes and listened to the deadly approaching footsteps.

 

Pacing up and down the small living room Matt was pulling at his hair. It was now over three hours since Y/N had left to retrieve the blood for Kylo, in the meantime they had to reanimate his little brother twice and he knew that if she wouldn´t return soon, Kylo would be done for.

Matt regretted that he didn´t insist on coming with her, but the answer was clear. He was a damn coward, he would have only dragged her down.

Waiting another few minutes, he looked at the black haired boy, his skin pale and wet with cold sweat.

What was he supposed to do, it was his fault…

He almost didn´t hear the tires screeching outside, because he was so caught up in his thoughts until Y/N kicked the door open and fell, with every bag she had carried, on her knees.

“Holy shit! What happened?! Wh… why didn´t you call?” Looking at her, she was covered in walker guts, her hair a mess, eyes red from crying and almost as pale as Kylo.

“I destroyed the Walkie with my damn butt when I fell down, now help me! There is no time for this!” pushing herself of the ground again, she dragged the container with the blood bags over to the bed, while pressing her right arm against her chest.

Combining tubes and needles she looked around.

“Ben the Hat stand!” quickly reacting, the small boy threw all of the hats and jackets onto the ground before dragging the stand over the floor, hi uncle picking them up before falling onto the coach again, so relieved that he couldn´t keep himself up anymore.

Hanging one of the Blood bags onto it, she connected it with the tube, before wrapping a string tightly around Kylos upper Arm.

“Ben bring the rest of the blood into the fridge.” she ordered and Ben nodded, grabbing the container before bringing it to the fridge in the kitchen.

It wasn´t hard to see his veins through his now almost white skin, but her hands were trembling too much as that she could put the needle correctly into it.

Trying to grab her hand, Y/N slapped Matts away. “Don´t.”

“Y/N it´s alright. You did enough.” reaching out for her hand again, the blonde slowly pulled the needle out of it.

“But…” she whimpered.

“It´s okay. You can rest now. You are back home.” and while he was saying those words, he could see her shoulders loosen and how the adrenaline slowly swept away, which left her with nothing more then the fear and pain that was held back the last few hours.

Feeling the tears starting to dwell up in her eyes, she didn´t try to hide them and could finally let everything out.

 

“How is he?” Y/N asked, sitting on the big armchair in the corner, cuddled up in a big sweatshirt from Kylo while holding on to a hot cup of tea.

After she took a shower it seemed like her mind and body were finally able to calm down.

“His pulse and breath are steady and we didn´t need to reanimate him, so his chances are good so far. It was good that you brought those patient files so I could calculate the dose of the drugs.” Matt sighed, while pulling a large blanket over Kylo and Ben, who had curled up next to his older brother.

“What happened to your shoulder?” taking a seat on the floor, since his uncle Luke had already fallen asleep on the couch from all this stress, Matt pointed to her right Arm that she was again pressing against her chest.

“I fell and dislocated it.” she mumbled while sipping from the hot beverage.

Surprised he furrowed his brows, before she sighed and pulled her legs against her chest.

“When I was about to bring the files back to the truck, I slipped from the fire escape ladder and fell, dislocating it. I thought I was done for.” telling him everything that happened in that hospital, Matt seemed more then fascinated.

“Before I drove back I relocated it. Grabbing onto the truck and yanked my body away from it and then …” she snipped with her fingers to recreate the cracking sound it had made.

“It hurt like a bitch…” seeing his questioning look, she pulled Kylos sweater over her nose.

“But how did you get away from them?”

“I actually didn´t. They just walked past me like I was nothing. And then I noticed that I was still covered in the carnage of that other biter. I guess it was the smell that threw them off.” trying to shrug her shoulders, she winced slightly.

“I could bandage it for you, so you don´t need to move your arm.” the blonde suggested but Y/n shook her head.

“No thank you. I´m good.”

“It´s no problem at all I can…” but she cut him off.

“Matt no!” flinching at her tone, he got quiet. It was as if he had almost forgotten what he had done to them and that she probably hated him now.

“Why did you do it?” Y/N asked after a few moments of silence.

Swallowing the lump in his throat he looked into the fireplace.

“It was shortly after we arrived at Washington. When I went on a search for more food I met them. First they seemed friendly and I wanted to bring them with me, but they said they didn´t trust other people yet and at that time I actually thought that would be reasonable. They asked me not to tell you guys yet, because they were sure Kylo would get suspicious and attack them.” raising his gaze to the bed were his little brothers were resting, Matt shook his head.

“But then they got more and more demanding, saying I needed to proof that they could trust us. So I gave them a little bit of food and gas from time to time. Until it was already to late and they …” ruffling through his blond locks, he just couldn´t believe how naive he was.

“If I wouldn´t give them what they asked, then they would do something to you and Ben. So they offered me to bring them to our new camp and let them take you or they would kill everyone.” taking of his glasses he rubbed over his burning Eyes.

“I´m sorry. I just wanted to protect us.” he sobbed and Y/N slowly sat down next to him to take the crying man in her arms.

“It´s okay now, everything will be okay again.” she whispered.


	13. Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on May 4th, 2018

Red. Everything was glowing in a dark red. He was covered in this sticky liquid, looking to his feat he saw Matt laying their, his glasses broken, blood coming out of his nose and mouth. Ben just next to him, his neck broken.

Scared he looked into his Arms, Y/N staring blankly back at him her throat slit open.

Jerking out of this horrible nightmare, Kylos eyes fluttered shut again quickly, to avoid the bright light that was blinding him.

Was he dead? He tried to recall the last thing he could remember but his mind was blank. Trying to sit up, he noticed how much effort it took his body to even push himself off the soft mattress.

When he looked around the place, he noticed the familiar interior. Brushing over his tired eyes, he just felt so lost.

“Am I still dreaming?” his voice sounded quieter then he was used to and it felt dry like he hadn´t used it in a long time.

Looking down at his hands, his mind was running wild. Maybe it wasn´t just a nightmare, but his memory of what happened. Did he really lose everyone? How was he supposed to live with that?

Hearing the door suddenly open and close he lifted his head up and there she was.

Y/Ns hair was covered in snow and she was holding onto a few freshly cut logs for the fireplace when her gaze met his.

Shocked her eyes widened, while the logs fell out of her arms onto the ground with a rumble.

With slow steps she approached him before seating herself onto the edge of the bed, her eyes wandering over his face in disbelieve.

Lifting her trembling hand, he leaned into it as soon as it was close enough, making her chuckle softly with tears dwelling up in her eyes.

Not being able to contain them any longer they soon dropped down her cheeks, it was such a big burden lifted from her shoulders. Slowly wrapping her arms around his neck she let out the loud sobs that were just waiting to burst out of her. Crying against his chest, he waited patiently for her to calm down again, stroking over her shaking back. Not knowing that she just was so happy to finally have him back.

“Y/N?” he whispered, not being able to take his eyes of her beautyfull face.

When he had said her name, she only now realised how much he had missed his voice, how much she had missed him say her name, how much she had missed him, his little gestures, just everything about him.

Laying her hands back against the sides of his face, she pulled him closer to gently let her lips brush against his.

It was just a short kiss and probably not the most ideal one, but for her it was perfect, especially after seeing Kylos shocked impression and blushing cheeks. For him it now felt definitely like a dream, this couldn´t be the real world.

“Are you gonna faint?” she asked, while trying to hide her giggle.

“I might …” he stated honestly with a ruff voice, before wrapping his arm quickly around her waist, his other hand holding onto her neck, before he pulled her into a hungry kiss again.

Getting caught by his little surprise attack, Y/N soon chuckled into the kiss and let her hands run through the hair in his neck, which send shivers down his spine.

Only pulling away because he was out of breath, Kylo carefully leaned his forehead against hers, looking into her enticing eyes.

“This is not a dream right? Please tell me it´s not…”

Smiling at him she gently stroked over his cheek. “It´s not, I promise.”

Closing his eyes, he gently stroked his nose against hers, while she inspected his face closer, her eyes wandering over the long scar.

“How are you feeling? Can I get you anything?” concerned she took his hand in hers and Kylo showed a small smirk. She was as caring as always.

“It feels like I slept a hundred years…” he shook his head in amusement and run his fingers over his throat, but Y/N didn´t laugh and her expression got serious.

“I´ll get you water.” she wanted to stand up, but Kylo grabbed her wrist. Suddenly scared that she would just vanish when he let her out of his sight.

Pressing a long kiss onto his forehead she showed him a reassuring smile. “I´ll be just over there, don´t worry.” pointing to the kitchen, he slowly loosened his grip, his eyes following her every movement.

Handing him the cold glas of water, she let him drown the whole glas before getting him another one and tried to find a way to tell him everything that happened since then.

Picking up the logs in front of the front door she placed a few in the light burning fireplace and piled up the rest next to it.

After throwing of her shoes, Y/N climbed into the bed next to him and he soon laid his head onto her lap.

“Where is Ben?” he asked, while he closed his eyes and enjoyed her soft touch while she run her fingers through his hair.

“He is out hunting with Matt and your uncle. Kylo… how much do you remember?”

“Blood. A lot of it.” thinking of Y/Ns slit throat in his nightmare, he turned onto his back and looked up to her, letting his fingers run over the scar on her neck. The pictures of that horrible night, were flooding back in again.

Raising his gaze he looked at her slight wet hair, the snow that was on it had already melted.

Stopping mid motion, his eyes suddenly widened in realisation.

“How long?” seeing her bite her lip he knew she was hesitant to answer this question.

Pushing himself from the mattress he looked into her eyes. “Y/N, how long?” he asked, this time more sternly.

“About three month… your shot wound got infected and your body needed every strength to heal from that.”

“Three month…?” he repeated and quickly pushed the blanket aside, stumbling weakly to the windows.

“Be careful!” Y/N followed and supported his last steps.

Seeing the snow outside, he understood that it really has been three month. “Is this really not a dream? Are you really here?” he asked again, not believing that he was out for such a long time.

“I am really here, Kylo.” pushing his forehead against hers, she pecked a small kiss onto his lips. “This is real.”

Slowly starting to nod, he took a deep breath.

“Can you still stand? You should rest, I really don´t want you to lose consciousness again.” Y/N pleaded but he shook his head.

“I´m okay really.” he didn´t want to get back into the bed and miss anything else that already happened without him.

“Then at least let me make you something light to eat.” pulling him to the kitchen she sat him down onto a chair.

“If you insist, my Darling.” brushing his hand over his face he suddenly stopped when he felt the unfamiliar scar on his cheek.

Leaving the dinner table he made his way to the bathroom, inspecting the large scar. Kylo had already forgotten that that bastard had cut his face open.

Slowly pulling up his shirt he saw the even larger burn scar on his stomach.

Two small arms were wrapping themselves around him from behind and he saw Y/N peaking around his torso.

“I look hideous…” he grunted annoyed, brushing his long black hair into his face to hide the ugly scar.

“You look still as handsome as ever to me.” Kylo could hear her mumble quietly and weirdly enough he actually believed her.

“Then you have a very weird taste in man, lucky me.” Letting her brush his hair back again, she slowly pulled him back to the kitchen, so that he could finally eat.

 

“So, you are telling me that if you smear yourself with biter guts, they just ignore you?”Kylo asked in disbelieve, while he pushed the empty plate away.

Nodding quickly she grinned. “Yeah saved my life a few times now! And this is how we secured this place.”

Tilting his head slightly she continued.

“Since behind the Lake there is just a cliff we are safe from that side, but on the other side we have open forest. We build a fence together, which leads them to the cliff. They fall down and we are out of danger. I used that trick when I was in the hospital as well. Luring them out to high places is a good method to get rid of them. We smeared their guts on the outside of the fence and they don´t try to break it down.” shrugging with her shoulders she suddenly noticed how Kylo looked at her. Completely fascinated with the storys she was telling.

“My little Lady is a real Warrior now, huh?” he smiled proudly and leaned over to ruffle through her hair, which she had missed so much, just feeling his strong hand on her head made her happy.

“If you are feeling alright I can show you around a bit.” Y/N offered and he agreed.

“Then lets start with our rooms first, so you can wear something warmer. It´s really cold outside.” while he followed her to the small hallway, he furrowed his brows.

“The dusty attic?” sceptical he stopped on the stairs. “We changed it up a bit, come on.” taking his hand she tugged him along.

Since Kylo was so tall he needed to duck a little because they were right under the roof, only in the middle of the room was he able to stand up straight. Y/N turned on some fairy lights, while Kylo looked around. The room looked nothing like he remembered it. Normally there would be old boxes, hunting equipment, tents that his uncle wouldn´t use anymore and other useless stuff in here and everything was covered in cobwebs but now… it was a cozy bed room.

“How did you guys get light up here?”

“Most of it runs over small solar garden thingys we found. Matt tinkered them together. We only use them when the light through the roof windows isn´t enough.” she explained and pointed out the window were he saw a few small solar panels.

To the right side were two mattresses, which he could tell belonged to his brothers. One of them surrounded with cables, tools and electronics. The other one with comics and the wall behind it covered in polaroids was obviously Bens.

“Take a look.” Y/N encouraged him, while rummaging through the bag with Kylos clothes. “We documented most of it, the first fish Ben caught or when we were building the chicken coop.”

Looking at all the pictures Kylo could only smile. Even though he was sad that he missed all of this, he was so proud of them for not giving up.

“We have chickens now?” he asked and she nodded.

“The best pictures I kept for myself though.” Y/N admitted and Kylo turned his attention to the other side of the room. There was just one mattress, it was a little wider but not by much and most of their bags were stored on the foot end of it.

“This is our bed.” she mumbled while placing the warmer clothes onto it.

“Oh… ours?” he smirked and she only stuck out her tongue.

“The way I remember it, you don´t have anything against cuddling with me.”

Sitting down next to her he pressed his lips against her temple.

“I really don´t.” noticing the Polaroids on the wall over the pillow, Kylo let his fingers run over them. Instead of random motives like the ones at Bens wall, these were particular picked, mostly showing her and Kylo at the start of there journey and he could remember the first time Ben took a picture of them ,sleeping next to each other. Some he never even had noticed that Ben had taken, were he and Y/N had watched the sunset or tried to start a campfire together or the time she was chasing him trough the camp. When he reached the last few, a sad smile showed up on his lips, they were mostly from the time he was unconscious, were Y/N cared for him. Sometimes curled up next to him, braiding his hair or reading to him.

Gently grabbing Y/N under her chin, he pulled her closer and let his lips brush against hers, while small footsteps were approaching them.

Ben run into the room but immediately made a disgusted grimace. “Ew!”

“Told you they were snogging.” Matt appeared behind his little brother and Kylo wanted to stand up to scold them but Y/N was quicker.

Giving both of them a slap against the back of their heads, she placed her hands on her hips and both apologized quietly.

Ruffling Bens hair, she nodded and he quickly run to Kylo with a big hug..

“I missed you!” the small boy mumbled against Kylos shoulder and the older one pressed him close against his chest. “I missed you to you little rascal.”

“Can I show him Chewie and Lando?” Ben turned around to Y/N and she rolled her eyes with a smile.

“Sure, but let him dress up first. Do you want to take a shower?”

“That would be fantastic.” Kylo nodded with a thankful smile.

 

Stepping out into the snow the cold air hit his face and Kylo took a deep breath. Feeling Y/Ns fingers run between his, he squeezed her hand lightly.

“What did you guys get?” she asked Ben who was running in front of them to get behind the house.

“Only rabbits. The deers were to cautious for us.” the small boy explained before opening a small hut. Kylo could already hear the little chirps from the small chicks.

“Where is Uncle Luke?”

“Skinning the rabbits.” Ben answered while he shrugged his shoulders. The little boy still couldn´t handle what happened to the animals, but he knew they needed them as food.

“Then I´ll go hunt deer tomorrow.” she promised and Kylo almost couldn´t believe his ears. A lot had changed while he was out.

Ben was carefully stepping inside and the small birds were gathering around his feet, screaming for food while the older chickens sat on their small hay stacks, watching everything carefully.

“So what are those things he was talking about?” Kylo whispered confused to Y/N who giggled. “We have two chicks who are different colours from the rest of the others. Ben decided to name them like the Heros from his comics.” she explained while Ben stalked through the chicks to show his older brothers the two brown birds in his hands.

“This one is Chewie, he has a stripe on his back. And this is Lando, he always seems up to something.” his little brother explained proud and Kylo ruffled his hair.

“Thats great, buddy. Where did we get those anyway?” he turned his attention back to Y/N beside him.

“There is a farm, about 20 miles away from here. We met the guy who lived there, when we were searching for a food resource. He has cows as well and we exchange things or help out on the farm in exchange for food.” feeling him lean more on her shoulder, she looked up.

“Dizzy…” he mumbled and she quickly wrapped an arm around his waist.

“Let´s get you inside, I knew you weren´t ready to get up yet.” Y/N sighed and Ben watched them closely.

“Can I come too?” he asked shyly and averted Matts Eyes.

“How about you give the chickens their food and the rest of your chores we can do together tomorrow.” Y/N offered the little boy and Ben showed them a toothy grin.

“Okay!” running back into the small chicken coop, all the chickens started to shoo around him.

Turning to the house, she looked over her shoulder to Matt who was left alone in the snow and soon retreated to his uncle in the workshop, who was probably preparing the rabbits they caught.

 

“How are you feeling?” balancing a tablet with snacks into the room, Y/N soon sat beside him on their mattress he was laying on. “Better.” he nodded while looking through the window above him into the blue sky.

“If you want I can hook you onto an IV, it would …” she offered and Kylo looked down on the inner side of his elbow, where he could see all the puncture marks from before.

“No, it´s okay, just … stay?” stretching his hand out to her she quickly grabbed it and crawled next to him. “But promise you drink much water then….”

“Y/N.” interrupting her he let his fingers run through her hair before pulling her against his chest.

“Nothing will happen to me, okay? I´m back now and I promised I won´t leave you.” Kylo whispered into her ear and she slowly nodded.

“I know… I´m just worried…” it was hard for her to admit this, but since that night all of them were even more cautious then before and it changed their way of doing things.

“So… what is the plan now?” Kylo suddenly asked and she furrowed her brows. “Did our Mother call or anything?”

Suddenly sitting up Y/N looked down at him with a worried expression on her face.

“Those bastards destroyed the satellite phone the night they attacked us and since you didn´t wake up, we just kind of decided to settle down here with your uncle.” he could see that she was scared that he might get angry about these news, but he gently caressed her cheek.

“Then we settle down here. As long as we are all together…” he nodded and Y/N could only smile relieved. Their mother had either abandoned them a long time ago or wasn´t alive any more and at this point he didn´t bother to keep his hopes up.

Seeing Y/N fiddle with her fingers again, he carefully grabbed her hand and pressed a kiss against the palm of it. “What do you wanna talk about?”

Biting her lip she slowly looked down at her hand who was resting comfortable in Kylos. “Ben…”

Ben grew up so much in just these few weeks that it was hard not to be proud of him but it still broke her heart when she thought about the easy and happy childhood he could´ve had.

“He is avoiding Matt, isn´t he?” Kylo suddenly mumbled and she looked up in his worried face.

“He can´t forgive him… I tried to talk with him about it. But he told me that he doesn´t even want to. He loves you very much and Matt almost took you away from him. He still loves him as well but…” she tried to put it in words and bit her lip.

“The same goes for me, I can´t forgive him for what he did, because I can´t imagine loosing you, but he just made a mistake that he deeply regrets. So please talk to him when you are ready.” drawing circles with her fingers on his chest he only let out a huff, before Ben came running up the stairs. The small boy soon, joining them and telling Kylo so many storys of all that had happened.

 

The next time Kylo woke up, it was the middle of the night, the moonlight that was flooding into the room was hitting his eyes and he slowly turned on his side.

Sighing he let his sight adjust to the darkness and noticed that the space next to him was empty, before he remembered that Y/N had told him that she would be the first to take watch.

Closing his eyes again, he let his hand run over the empty spot, before his ears picked up some quiet footsteps.

Listening to Y/N sneaking into the room, he almost burst out in laughter when he heard her kick Matt so that he would finally wake up after whispering his name a few times.

It took some time before he felt the mattress dip under her weight.

Kicking of her boots and pulling of her sweatshirts, she soon crawled under the blanket next to him.

Her eyes wandered over Kylos sleeping face and she gently leaned herself onto him, letting her chin rest on his chest.

Laying her ear against his chest for a moment, she listened to his strong and steady heartbeat.

For her it still felt like a miracle that she had him back, to have the certainty that he would open his eyes tomorrow and show his typical smirk.

Slowly tracing her fingertips over his eyelashes, she got lost in her thoughts, wondering when she started to care for him so much, while her finger wandered over the bridge of his nose and rested it on his plum lips.

“What are you doing?” his rough and tired voice interrupted her, before he placed his lips onto her knuckles.

Lifting her gaze to his honey brown eyes, her lips curled up into a smile.

“I love you.” she whispered so sincere that it almost made him tear up.

“I love you too.” laying his hand against her cheek, Kylo leaned forward to let his lips gently glide over hers.


	14. Burning Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on May 11th, 2018

In just two weeks time Kylo was already back in shape, following a strict training routine.

“So where do you want to go?” Kylo grunted while pushing himself off the floor, before lowering his body again.

Y/N was laying on her side on the comfortable mattress, while watching him doing his push ups, a map in her hand.

“I don´t know… I can´t concentrate when you look so sweaty.” she announced bluntly and Kylo started to laugh and fell back on the ground.

Grinning, since she got him ice cold, she started to unfold the map. “There is a mall here. I would like to look for some clothes, Ben is having a growth spurt I didn´t even know was possible.” she mumbled and rolled onto her chest.

“It´s quite far, we would need a place to stay for a night. Or maybe even two…” Kylo suddenly grinned but she gave him a light tap against the tip of his nose.

“Hey this isn´t a vacation, you little pervert!” chuckling she looked back at the map.

“What? A little honeymoon wouldn´t be a bad idea.” still flat on the floor he stretched his arm out to stroke through her hair.

“H…honeymoon…” she repeated quiet and stared at him before her cheeks turned red, but quickly her brows furrowed.

“Idiot…” Y/N pouted while Kylo carefully leaned over her and let his whole weight crush down on her.

“Too heavy!” she squealed while hitting the mattress with her hands. “Time out!”

“Since when am I the only person who wants to have some fun?” he let out a huff, while Y/N had stopped moving.

“A lot of things have changed…” she only whispered and he slowly stood up and pulled her with him.

“Y/N?” raising an eyebrow he looked into her eyes and she showed him a small smile before giving him a small smooch on the tip of his nose.

“Hey you two Lovebirds how about you come down for a second?” they suddenly heard Luke shout from downstairs.

Growling in annoyance, Kylo glared at the door and Y/N took a deep breath.

“Fucking interruptions…” he mumbled to himself, offering his lady a hand and helped her up on her feet.

Jumping down the stairs, Y/N immediately caught Ben who was looking into the fridge and started to twirl with him through the living room.

“What did he do this time?” the small boy grinned, while he was hanging from her arms.

“He tried to crush me with his so called muscles! Can you believe that?” she asked dramatically shocked and Ben started to giggle.

“Yeah he got so fat from just laying around all the time.” Ben nodded wisely and they heard Kylo growl from a far.

“You two….” he hissed dangerously low and both of them only struck out their tongues.

Luke who was mostly watching these kind of situations with a smiled, suddenly started to giggle as well.

“Having you kids around is really a blessing, It never gets boring.” the old man nodded with a smile, while sipping on his herbal tea.

“So what did you wanna talk about, uncle?” Kylo asked before taking a seat on the dining table next to Matt who was focused on his tinkering.

Ruffling through Matts blond locks to get his attention, Kylo took a closer look at what he was working on. It was a completely disassembled radio, which he seemed to upgrade.

“It seems like the winter will soon get harsher, so the trip you two are planning to search for more resources you should leave at least in the next few days.”Luke explained to them and Y/N and Kylo looked at each other.

“So I wanted to talk about the resources we needed and christmas is around the corner so a few presents would be nice.” he giggled and Kylo rolled his eyes a little.

“Really? We can have presents?” Ben suddenly asked excited, looking up to Y/N who was still holding him. “Sure I don´t see anything that speaks against it.” she nodded.

“Nice! I´ll write a list!” Jumping out of her Arms, the small boy quickly run up the stairs.

“Then let´s plan this trip properly.” Y/N joined the Boys on the table with her map, pens and paper.

“Not so fast…” Luke interrupted while standing up from his place to walk over to them. “Matt and I think that an extension for this hut would be necessary. We could connect the Hut and the Workshop, since they stand close enough together.”

“We can´t build now, the snow would just make everything more difficult and ruin the wood.” Y/N countered and Luke nodded.

“But we can plan ahead. Looking for the right materials and where we can find them so when spring comes we can start early.” he patting her head.

“It will take us a few days to gather stuff, especially if Ben wishes for something specific. Is that alright?” Kylo suddenly grinned at Y/N who was squinting her eyes at him with suspicion.

“As long as you two will be alright I don´t mind.” Luke shrugged his shoulders and layed his hands on her shoulder.

“But I would appreciate that haircut you were offering the other day, before you guys leave.” he admitted and looked at the long bangs that were hanging in his eyes.

“Sure thing. Matt I could cut yours as well then.” Y/N offered and the blond nodded almost relieved.

 

After they had discussed everything they needed and what route Kylo and her would take, Y/N already was starting to pack their stuff they would need.

Watching her from the door entry he only smiled down at her, he loved his family, but he very much looked forward to the time he would have alone with his beautyfull girlfriend.

“AHA! I finally found you!” furrowing his brows he let himself fall onto their sleeping site and tried to guess what she was holding onto.

“What did you find?” he asked, just giving up.

“My razor! I can finally shave again.” giggling excited Kylo only tilted his head slightly.

“You know, you don´t need to do it because of me.” he stated quickly, not to pressure her in any way.

“I know.” kissing the tip of his nose she smiled at him. “I just want to feel a little pretty again, even though we have the end of the world. Maybe I even get some dresses on this trip. Would be useful in the summer.” she started to mumble the rest while thinking of their little so called shopping trip.

“Whatever makes you feel better, Love. I still love you even as a hairy gremlin.”

Laughing to herself she let her fingers run through his beard. “But only because the world ended. Oh no wait, I remember a few song phrases that you would love me regardless of mostly anything and that was when the world hadn´t ended yet.”

Suddenly Kylos cheeks started to burn. “So you did read my songtexts you damn Minx!” trying to grab her, Y/N quickly stood up and ran out of the room.

Sprinting after her she already locked herself in the bathroom.

Looking around the corner; Ben was curious about the sudden tumult, but seeing the flustered face of his brother the little boy could already guess what happened.

“Oh oh …” he whispered and Kylo immediately shot him a glare and the small boy started running.

“Why did you tell him that we read his journal?!” Ben cursed Y/N, who only laughed in the bathroom, while Kylo was chasing his little brother into the snow.

 

When the next morning came, Kylo was grumpier then ever. Sure he was excited, but this night he and Y/N both didn´t have a lot of sleep. His pretty little girlfriend had turned so much that he got pushed and kicked the whole night.

At some point, the only thing that kept her still was when Kylo wrapped the blanket around her and held Y/N tightly.

Now she was laying next to him, most of her hair had fallen into her sweet face, until Matt and Ben woke up and started to rummage threw the room.

Groaning Kylo held his arm over his Eyes until he felt Y/N legs over his side, while she tried to climb over him. “Don´t go yet…” wrapping his arm around one of her smooth legs, he just pulled his pillow over his head.

“Kylo we need to get ready …” she huffed, but cuddled up against his warm back.

Lightly chuckling, he let his fingers run up and down her leg. “Then you shouldn´t get so comfortable, my Love.”

He gave her a few more minutes, before he pushed himself of the comfortable and warm bed, brushing the strands of hair out of her sleeping face.

Leaning over her he showered Y/N with small butterfly kisses.

“Come on, it´s time for our adventure.”

 

Around noon, they were all standing next to their trusty red Truck, saying good bye to others.

Hugging everyone tightly they were soon on the road.

“What did Luke gave you?” Kylo asked while carefully driving on the snowy path.

Looking at the case, she giggled a little bit. “It´s an Elvis CD for the Road. Wanna listen to it?”

“Always! It´s the King, throw it in!” Kylo said excited but soon looked confused at the radio, when a deep womans voice echoed through the drivers cabin.

“Thats not Elvis!”

Looking at the case again, Y/N laughed when she read the index. “It´s a cover CD, this is Burning Love from Wynonna.”

Kylo sighed annoyed, but Y/N soon started to loudly sing along and he couldn´t prevent the smile that was forming on his lips.

 

They decided to drive as long as they could, since the biters were mostly inactive in the winter they didn´t need to fear to drive into a herd.

Looking closely onto the street, Y/N risked a quick glance to Kylo who was sleeping in the passenger seat.

When she drove into a driveway of a, what seemed to be a secure house, Kylo woke up from the rumbling.

“Are we there?” he mumbled while brushing over his eyes.

“Yeah, the Mall is just 10 minutes away now.” jumping out of the truck, she opened the garage door, so Kylo could park it.

Clearing the House in mere seconds, the soon stood next to each other, both heavy breathing because they just barricaded the front door with a heavy closet.

“Safe enough?” Kylo suddenly asked and she tilted her head confused.

“Sure?” Y/N mumbled and looked at the barricaded room. Suddenly feeling Kylos big hand on her hip, he quickly picked her up and pinned her against the next wall before crashing his lips onto hers.

“Kylo!” she giggled between kisses and wrapped her arms around his neck as long with her legs around his waist.

Soon the kiss turned more and more passionate, while Kylo carefully tried to get up the stairs with Y/N in his arms.

Clumsily falling onto the bed, Kylo couldn´t keep his hands off her.

“I don´t think I will be able to stop, gorgeous…” he whispered into her ear, before gently nibbling on her earlobe.

With one strong thrust with her hip, Y/N had pinned down Kylo on the bed.

“Then we don´t stop.” she grinned down at him, before grabbing the hem of her sweatshirt and pulling it over her head.

“Oh fuck …” Kylo could only mumble, when he saw her just sitting on him in her bra.

Letting his rough hands run along her sides, Y/N shivered under his touch while she bit her lower lip.

Leaning forward, he started to place small kisses onto her stomache before letting them wander higher until he was finally able to catch her lips again.

“Are you sure you want to …” cutting his sentence off with another kiss, she slowly let his hands to the back of her bra.

“I am! Just shut up already…” softly chuckling into her hungry kisses, Kylos heart was about to burst, when he opened the hooks of her underwear.

 

Looking down at her sleeping figure, Kylo felt like he was in a dream again. He just couldn´t believe what had happened this night. Well to be honest he still couldn´t believe that since two weeks she was finally his.

“You are so beautyfull…” he whispered quietly, while stroking her hair out of her face so he could see her face better.

“And you are so cute, when you think I can´t hear you…” she started to giggle and Kylos brows immediately furrowed.

“Sure, whatever…” he huffed before pulling her into his arms.

“Is it morning already?” she asked, while leaning onto his chest.

“Almost, it should be sunrise soon. Why?” Kylo yawned and looked out of the window.

“Because today is our Date and I planned a nice Breakfast for us.” placing a long kiss on his lips, she slowly left the bed and stole the shirt from Kylo of the floor before slipping in her slip.

Leaning back in his pillow, he followed her with his eyes before biting his lip.

“You´re hopefully getting ready and not stare at my ass.” he heard her call when she left the room and he could only chuckle.

After a quick shower, Kylo joined Y/N in the small kitchen. Brushing her hair on one side of the shoulder, he soon let his lips wander over the soft skin of her neck, wrapping his arms around her waist.

“Don´t…I´m gonna mess it up…” she giggled while holding onto the frying pan. Taking a look, at it Kylos Eyes widened in excitement.

“Are those fucking Pancakes?!” he almost screamed and she shushed him quickly with a kiss.

“Not the best ones but a good replacement.” Y/N pointed at the Milk Powder which would normally used for babys but it worked for them as well.

Sitting with Kylo at the Kitchen Isle and munching their Pancakes it almost felt normal.

“I actually thought you would at least hold out until we had our first date.” Y/N mumbled with a full mouth and Kylo only chuckled, kissing her cheek.

“Well you are just that sexy that I couldn´t contain myself any longer.” he purred into her ear and let his nose gently brush over it.

Grabbing the empty plates she slipped from the stool and placed the dished into the sink.

“We have a few condoms left.” Y/N heard him whisper in her ear and turned around with a raised brow.

“Kylo geez!” she giggled while he kissed her cheek, before tracing his lips along her neck.

“Hey we need to use our freedom wisely, my Love! At least here we don´t get interrupted all the time.”

Throwing her over his shoulder, he already sprinted up the stairs while Y/N laugh echoed through the empty house.


	15. Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on May 18th, 2018

Later then originally planned, the two of them were inside the snow covered mall. It looked extremly beautyfull but creepy at the same time when they thought about all the people that would normally stroll through here.

“The roof collapsed. We should be careful.” she whispered and Kylo nodded, looking around this abandoned place.

“So since we don´t really need to be worrying about biters in this cold. What do you want to do first?” Kylo had the widest gin on his face and already stomped through the snow to a distorted floor plan.

It was obvious that Kylo enjoyed to be on the road again, not being locked up in the hut.

“You know what? I let you decide.” she smiled, while kissing his cheek. Seeing him so excited warmed her heart even in this cold winter day.

Thinking silently for a moment it seemed like he had a sudden idea.

“Come on!” pulling her onto the snowy escalator, they carefully climbed the metal stairs.

“So what is your plan?” she asked while looking around the upper floor.

“Play pretend! Ready for Prom?” he grinned wide and she could only shake her head with a smile.

The first hours the both of them just walked around, looking into the windows and explored the shops while stealing kisses from each other.

Pulling her into a clothing shop, Y/N first thought they would just look for new clothes, especially for Ben, but when they were passing all the regular clothes she got suspicious.

“Uhm Kylo?”

“Just a little more.” he promised and soon they were surrounded by fancy clothes.

“We pick your prom dress!” he suddenly announced and twirled her around. Starting to giggle, she looked at all the fancy dresses in front of her.

“Are you serious?” she asked, letting her fingers run over the soft fabric of a red satin dress.

“Why not? Today is our Date, so why shouldn´t it be our Prom as well?” Kylo asked and pressed a gentle kiss against her temple.

“Today is our day. Let´s enjoy it.” he whispered into her ear and she could only grin.

“Let´s party!”

 

Grabbing everything they could carry, the soon wrecked the dressing rooms, trying on the weirdest combinations while laughing their heads off.

“God you look hideous.” Y/N tried to contain her laughter when she saw her boyfriend with a top hat.

“Look who is walking, Miss Mermaid!” he stalked around her and looked at the enormous gown.

“Did you pick anything yet?” he asked while unbuttoning a black shirt.

“Actually yes.” proudly holding up a simple black dress he smirked. She did fit it to his liking he knew that, but as long as she liked it too he was fine with it.

“You will look gorgeous! Take it, and let´s look around a bit more, the had some good warm clothes up front. Maybe we can find something from the Wishlist.” he mumbled while pulling over his shirt and big flanel jacket.

“Sounds good to me. How about the Toystore on the corner.” she nodded and shouldered her backpack.

“And the CD Shop on the other side.” he added.

While they looked through the normal clothes, Y/N couldn´t hinder a sighed leaving her lungs. All these fashion clothes just a waste. The y weren´t even usable in anyway, even if they would try and make something new out of it.

Everything that could be slightly usable wandered into empty bags, and Y/N and Kylo were more then satisfied with the bigger clothes for Ben. There weren´t much with space prints but dinosaurs should be just as good.

When they slandered through the Music Store, it was like a flashback from an earlier life. Normally she would have hung out with her friends here, while trying to get the newest CD of their favourite Artists. But now this store was empty, filled with dust and things that would probably never been touched again by anyone when they would leave.

“What do you think of this one?” turning around to Kylo, who had called out to her, she saw him hold up a black new acoustic guitar.

“I think it´s a good replacement for your old one.” hugging him tightly she knew how much he missed his old one, which sadly got damaged.

Looking at his open big, she noticed the at least 20 CD cases. “Geez Kylo what are all those?” she giggled and wanted to reach out for one but he stopped her.

“Just… music….” he mumbled and quickly walked around her. Shrugging her shoulders she followed.

Exploring every store they could get into they soon noticed that it was already getting dark.

“Well at least we found the clothes we needed already.” she looked at the bags on the cargo bed of the truck and then back to the sky.

“Okay, then let´s look into this thing and then we go back for now.” Kylo swung a crowbar before returning inside the mall and up the escalator. Y/N followed slowly, watching Kylo turn a corner before she stopped in her tracks. Maybe it was just her imagination, but she thought she heard a scratching sound nearby.

When she wanted to call out to Kylo, he already came sliding around the corner. “RUN!”

For a moment she wasn´t sure if she believed her eyes, when she saw a bunch of dogs running after him. “Oh Fuck!!” turning on her heels the both of them were running as fast as they could.

“The escalators!” Kylo screamed before Y/N jumped on the middle part to slide it down, falling into the snow, she quickly jumped up before Kylo crashed right beside her, the dogs still on their heels.

“Get to the Truck quick!!” breaking through the doors she suddenly felt Kylos hand grabbing the back of her jeans before he tossed her onto their vehicle, landing next to her seconds after.

Catching their breaths, both of them soon started to laugh while the dogs circled the car. Not hearing anyone of them growl but more whimper they carefully looked over the edge.

“I think they are just hungry. We could spare some…” she suggested to Kylo who ruffled through her hair before he nodded.

Throwing the dogs the snacks the had kept for themselves, Kylo rummaged through his backpack to reveal another polaroid camera. Taking a few shots of the dogs and how Y/N feed them. Soon all of them left as a big group, jumping and playing around in the snow.

 

Looking at herself in the mirror, she almost didn´t recognize herself, even with the fancy, black long dress on. Half a year ago she probably would have tried to curl her hair and put nice make up on, but now the only thing she could to was to put up her hair with the pins she wound in a drug store and a bit of eyeliner.

“Can I come out now? Why did I even need to put it on now?” she sighed, disappointed that she couldn´t be prettier even if she wanted to.

Opening the bathroom door, Kylo grinned and looked her up and down.

“God you look so fucking hot…” he mumbled and it quickly put a smile back to her lips. “Even though I prefer your biter slayer look.” gently hitting him against his shoulder he slowly pulled her into the living room.

“Wow…” she could only breath while looking around. He had barricaded all the windows so that the light from the at least 50 candles wouldn´t be noticed from outside, while soft music was echoing through the room.

“It´s not ideal, I know. But it´s … some kind of prom?” nervous he scratched his neck while he looked on the floor.

“I love it…” she whispered while cuddling up against his chest. “Thank you.”

“When did you came up with this?” taking her hands he only shrugged with his shoulders.

“I don´t know, it just came to my head.” starting to slowly sway to the music she gently laid her arms around his neck.

Pulling her closer, the two of them slowly danced to the quiet music in the background.

Laying her head against his chest, Y/N closed her eyes, just enjoying this normal moment, before a weird pop song started to play.

“Oh my God, I didn´t know that they were such horrible fucking songs on this fucking CD.” Kylo quickly apologized and changed the music.

“I don´t care which music is playing just come here!” stretching out her arms, he soon returned to her before pressing light kisses against her lips.

 

Stretching under the warm blanket, Y/N wrapped her arms around Kylos large Torso before opening her Eyes.

“Kylo?” sighing she tried to take a look out the window but he was holding her down.

Growling he tried to bury her again under the blanket, but she was having none of it this time. Since about three days they had all the stuff they needed and normally they would have returned already, but somehow Kylo managed to persuade her to stay a little longer.

“I go take a shower and after that, we should plan, okay?” she whispered and showered him with little kisses all over his face.

“Yeah… sure, whatever.” Kylo pulled his pillow closer and pressed his face in it.

Shaking her head with a smile, Y/N searched for clean clothes before retreating into the bathroom.

Suddenly hearing screams, Kylo opened his eyes again, had he dozed off before the faint scream became more prominent and his head snapped up.

“Y/N?!” calling for her he didn´t got an answer. Stumbling onto his feet, the screams became louder and louder by the second.

“Y/N answer!” he screamed through the House and hasty looked into every room before he came to the locked bathroom door, the screams now so loud that they were ringing in his ears.

“Y/N are you okay?!” rattling at the door, panic was rising in his chest when she didn´t answer. “Open the damn door!! Come one sweetheart!!” his heart started to race and the screams became more and more painful. Not being able to see another way, Kylo started to punch the wooden door until a gaping hole had formed, on the other side was Y/N looking shocked at him.

“Are you okay? I…I heard you screaming …” he suddenly mumbled until he noticed her scared look. His eyes suddenly widening in realisation. She hadn´t screamed and she wasn´t in any danger.

Closing his Eyes he pushed the hair, that had falling in his face, back. It was all in his imagination. The moment he woke up and she wasn´t around his mind had instantly switched to the night were this bastard was dragging her away, being forced to listen to her screams while he couldn´t help her, they were burned into his mind.

Catching her breath, Y/N was watching Kylo closely while pulling back on her sweatshirt, before opening the destroyed door.

Cupping his face, she looked in to his eyes which were focused on the floor in horror.

“It´s okay…” she whispered, realising that he probably had a panic attack.

“Kylo look at me!” sternly lifting his chin, his eyes which were filling up with tears met hers. “You need to breath, come on.” taking a deep breath herself, he soon joined her, even though his were extremely shaky.

But soon both of them took deep and long breaths together and he seemed to calm down.

“We are fine Kylo. Nobody is hurting us anymore.” Y/N tried to reassure him and could hear him repeat her words quietly.

Smiling at him she carefully left small kisses on his cheek before pressing a final long one on his lips.

“How about you join me in the bathtub? Then you don´t have to be scared to loose me.”

Feeling his hand on her neck, Y/N let him pull her into another kiss before he slowly nodded.

“Y/N I …” laying a finger on his lips, she leaned her forehead against his. “It´s okay.” Hugging his Torso tightly the two of them just stood there a few moments while embracing each other.

 

Leaning against his bare chest, Y/N was staring down at there connected hands.

“We really should go home.” feeling Kylo push his head against the back of her shoulder she sighed.

“I know you rather would stay a little longer, but you are worried otherwise you wouldn´t just had that panic attack. And I´m worried too.”

He knew she was right, even though he didn´t want to admit it.

“I know…” he finally agreed and hugged her tighter.

“Besides, Ben will hate us if we don´t show up with his stuff soon” hearing his soft chuckle, Y/N looked over her shoulder and pressed a long kiss on his cheek.

“You know what?” she suddenly asked and turned around in the bathtub. “Maybe you should get a white beard, you could be Santa.” she giggled while putting foam on his beard and hair.

“You little…” grabbing her by her hip, he started to tickle her while she tried to fend of his hands with a laugh.

At the end both of them were totally covered in foam, laughing at each other at how ridiculous they looked, before Kylo was wiping her face clean, gently stroking over her cheek.

“Yeah, let´s go home.”


	16. Brothers will be Brothers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on May 25th, 2018

It felt like the longest trip they had ever made, maybe it was because they were going home and would need to leave their privacy behind, but it just felt exhausting.

The snow had picked up and the drive back took longer and longer, that they even couldn´t find a place to rest, so they head to sleep in the drivers cabin, cuddled against each other to keep warm.

“Ben probably took Matts last nerve.” Y/N chuckled at that thought and was almost glad when they finally saw the selfbuild fence again.

Uncle Luke opened it for them, so they could bring the Truck in.

It took almost two whole hours to get everything from the Truck inside but it definitely was worth it when they saw Bens sleepy but happy face.

“Hello my big boy!” Y/N kneeled down to pull him into a long hug. “I got you some new clothes wanna try them on? I really can´t endure your belly button any more.” she chuckled while pulling the new sweatshirts out.

“Dinosaurs?” the small boy yawned and she nodded.

“Sorry buddy, but they only had these.”

“No there awesome…” he mumbled quietly in her arm, almost ready to fall asleep again.

“He did a lot of work today.” Matt explained to her, while taking the clothes out of her hand, so she could hold the boy, that was falling asleep in her arms.

“Thank you.” she mumbled, before picking up Ben to bring him back up in his bed.

“N…No problem…” Matt stuttered lightly and Kylo only huffed, while helping Luke to stow away the food.

“We found a few construction sites and hardware stores, were we can get our stuff for spring.” Pushing the Map against Matts chest, Kylo tried to look into his eyes but his older brother avoided them.

“Well it was a long drive. It´s best when we rest for now, could you take care of the rest?”

“S…sure.” Matt took the bags from Kylo and retreated to the kitchen, while Kylo slowly walked up the stairs, he didn´t know why, but something felt off. Maybe it was because he had spend so much time alone with Y/N that he felt possessive when another man looked at her.  
Brushing over his eyes he entered their bedroom. Y/N and Ben totally knocked out when he climbed under the blanket with them.

 

When it was supposedly Christmas eve, Kylo and Y/N sneaked down into the living room to prepare the presents for everyone, while Uncle Luke was loudly snoring in his bed.

“Do you think they will like it?” she whispered quietly while hanging the small tree with fairylights.

“It´s the best we could do.” Kylo only shrugged with his shoulders, placing the poorly wrapped presents under it.

“You don´t seem very cheerful today…” crawling over to him, she sat down in his crossed legs and wrapped his arms around her.

Sighing he placed kisses against her hair.

“It just feels like something is off… Didn´t you notice Matts weird behaviour? He started to stutter again.” he mumbled into her ear and she only shrugged with her shoulders.

“Maybe you are just to anxious after what happened…”

“That´s not what I mean, he especially is stuttery when he is around you…”

Realising what her boyfriend just had said, he turned her head slightly to look at him.

“Are you implying that Matt has a crush on me?”

“Well you are basically the only girl around and even though he is such a big nerd, he probably has … desires.” Kylo tried to explain his worrys to her, but shuddering at the thought alone.

“Well then he has enough `material`.” shrugging her shoulders she placed kisses onto his knuckles.

“Excuse me?” Kylo suddenly got serious and turned her around in his lap.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Calm down, he just saw me in my underwear. Once. The Night you almost died and left me behind. I needed to change quickly to get you your blood.” placing a hand gently against the side of his face he nodded, slowly stroking his nose against hers before he stole her lips with his.

“I´m still yours and will be in the future. So don´t be jealous. Just talk with him.” cuddling against his brode chest, she closed her eyes before she heart the tiny steps of ben who came running into the room.

“MERRY CHRISTMAS!!” he screamed of the top of his lungs before jumping onto the both, while look sat now confused in his bed. “Can I open my presents?”

“Sure go for it!” grabbing Bens face, Y/N showered it in kisses while he tried to avoid them.

Letting Ben search for his gifts, Matt was slowly waddling into the room his blonde locks standing up in all directions.

“Good Morning…” he mumbled while rubbing over his sleepy eyes, putting his glasses back on his nose.

Kylo leaned his head onto Y/Ns shoulder who was taking a picture of Ben when he finally unwrapped his presents.

Maybe he was really just imagining things, but he could swear that Matt was staring at her legs from time to time.

“Aren´t you cold in those shorts?” Kylo asked her quietly before pressing a few kisses against her temple.

“just a little…” she mumbled, totally dazing off in his arms from all the cuddles.

“Then get into something warmer, before you catch a cold.” nodding, she slowly stood up and vanished for a few moments, coming back in Kylos big sweatpants.

He only shook his head with a smile and greeted her back in his arms.

Otherwise it was a normal day, Ben was constantly switching between the things they had got him, comics, toys and the new clothing that Y/N was trying just trying to get him to wear.

“Arms up!” pulling the new sweatshirt over his head, she grinned. It was a lbit big, but he would definitely grow into them.

“What´s with you guys?” asked Luke, while Kylo and her just sat there, watching them with their presents.

“Oh we got lots of presents already.” she grinned wide before placing a kiss onto Kylos cheek.

“Yeah, we didn´t think it would be necessary to wrap that stuff when we used it already.” Kylo shrugged with his shoulders before taking a sip of his coffee.

“Is Y/N now pregnant?” Ben suddenly asked and Kylo almost spit his whole coffee on the floor.

Coughing, Y/N started to pat his back before looking shocked at Ben.

“Where did you get that idea?” she asked sweet, but ready to get that someone a slap against their head.

Pointing at Luke and Matt, she threw them a furious look.

“W…we just disgust the possibility!! How to make this place secure if something like that would ha…happen!!” Matt quickly waved his hands, scared that both of them were gonna give him a punch.

After Kylo calmed down and could breath normally again, he sighed deeply.

“You guys don´t need to worry about something like this. We discussed this topic already …” taking Y/Ns hand he pressed her lightly against him, before letting his lips rest against her scalp.

Avoiding the gazes from the others, Y/N looked onto the floor leaning more against Kylo.

“Sorry, we shouldn´t have brought it up.”

“Oh, I had really liked to be an older brother…” Ben said, sad about these news as well.

“Ben you would be an uncle, you idiot.” Kylo laughed and ruffled through his hair.

“I don´t want to be an uncle! Uncles are always old, have you looked at Uncle Luke lately?” the small boy complained and all of them started to laugh.

 

Spring took a long time to come, but it was finally here.

“Will you be alright?” Y/N slowly letting Kylo pull her closer, his hands resting on her hip.

“I will be fine.” he promised and showered her face with kisses, which was also covered in a few streaks of paint. Her hair was in a chaotic bun and her hands were covered in paint as well. Ben didn´t look any better.

“We just grab the rest of the wood and be back in a sec.” kissing her lips one last time, Luke loudly cleared his throat.

“Don´t make the little one uncomfortable.” the old man said and they both looked down to Ben.

“What are you looking at me for. I´m not the one almost puking.” the black haired boy said and pointed at his other older brother.

Matt was already standing at the passenger door of the Truck and rolled his eyes.

“Well we will be off…” pulling her into another kiss, he let his hands wander over her behind and she lightly chuckled into the kiss before hitting Kylos shoulder lightly.

Watching them leave, she and Ben waved for a while, before returning to the half finished expansion of the wooden hut.

“Just this last bit and we are finally done.” Kylo mumbled to strike up a conversation.

“If you hadn´t ruin the last patch, we would have been finished already.” his older brother huffed, annoyed and frustrated, which they had to endure the last few days, especially Kylo.

“We would have been biter food otherwise!” pulling up to the hardware shop, Kylo stomped onto the brake.

After the last few weeks, there was tension between the two older brothers and not just from Kylos side, Matt was throwing blame around left and right.

“Sure, you always got an excuse for everything.” Matt hissed and walked around the big storage hall.

“What the fuck is your problem?!”

“Kylo who always get what he wants. Kylo the Artist in the family. Kylo the big hero of everyone. I could puke every time I look at you!” the blonde suddenly turned around furious.

“Come on then, let it all out, Matty.” holding his Arms wide open, Kylo was already readying himself for a fight if it would come to it.

“I´m fed up with your bullshit! Oh how everyone loves the talented Kylo. I worked my ass of for this damn family, but nooo, you who could play some wrong tunes on his first guitar got praised like it was gods work!” Matt started to scream and started threw thing around.

“You were never at home! As soon as you could leave you were gone! Focused on your studying instead of coming to visit, don´t fucking blame it on me! Mum and Dad tried but you always pushed them away!” Kylo countered, avoiding a screwdriver that was flying his way.

“The big Kylo who could ruin everything and still would be forgiven by everyone! I mean you killed Y/Ns parents and she still falls in love with you! What does she even see in you?!”

Pressing his hands into fists, Kylo only scoffed.

“I fucking knew it. That is your problem? That I won´t let you fuck my girlfriend?!” he was ready to pounce on Matt and break his goddamn nose until the noticed the loud pounding at the door, that suddenly broke down, biters swarming in from everywhere, probably lured by their loud screams.

“Fuck! Get up on the shelves quick.” pulling Matt to the high industrial shelves he boost his older brother up, before climbing after him. Matt quickly pulling him on the highest shelve.

Looking down at the undead, Kylo took a deep breath.

“Well shit…”

 

“Kylo…” Matt mumbled after a while, his legs pressed his chest, while he was staring down at the biters.

“Matt, just shut up, otherwise I´m really gonna throw you down there.” his younger brother sighed, rubbing over his eyes with an annoyed grunt.

“I´m sorry. I´m always getting so frustrated since we were basically caged in the whole winter. Every little thing gets me ticking and I just don´t know how to handle it. Maybe it´s just because we were always together 24/7 without having any privacy and endure each others company, but when we finish this it may get better…” he spoke truthfully and Kylo looked slowly up at him.

“Ben likes you more, Y/N likes you more, Our Parents like you more. Even Uncle Lukes likes you more and you burned his first scout camp down.” now even Matt started to lightly chuckle and Kylo groaned embarrassed.

“Oh fuck, don´t even remind me. I was so eager to help him with this damn camp fire… I run right into the gas canister.” shaking his head with somewhat of a smile.

“I got grounded for a freaking year and uncle Luke never trained me again. I felt so horrible…” shaking his head, he thought how banal this whole situation was now. Back then it was just a few burned tents but now they were sitting on high sheves full of wood, one wrong move and they could fall to their death.

“Wow. I really can´t let you guys out for 2 hours.” they suddenly heard Y/Ns voice and looked up to the roof were she was looking through an open window.

“Do I even want to know how you got here?” Kylo called up and she struck her tongue out.

“A bicycle, so be glad I didn´t get eaten!” they knew she was angry at them, because they didn´t call or anything but the walkie was in the truck with the rest of their stuff.

“Are you getting us out of here or not, babe?”

“Maybe I just leave you guys here, that would be a very educational lesson!” she hissed but looked around.

“How many?”

“Around 70.” Kylo counted and she sighed.

“You guys are impossible.” seeing that they didn´t even have any weapons on them besides the knifes, she rolled her eyes.

“I will lure them to the loading area. You guys get your weapons.” seeing her shadow, through the milky glass, carefully balancing on the roof, they soon heard loud banging on the other side of the hall.

Watching the biters attention switch to the noise the boys, soon managed to get to the Truck and get their silenced pistols, slowly thinning the group of biters.

Helping Y/N down the ladder, Kylo immediately got a hit against the back of his head which only made him chuckle, before he smothered her in kisses.

“Stop! I´m still angry with you! And you too!” she pointed her finger first at Kylo and then at Matt.

“Let´s get this damn wood and I need more paint.”

“Oh so you only came for the paint…” Kylo pouted lightly and she shot him a glare.

“I´m here, because I tried to call you to and nobody picked up.” constantly poking his chest Kylo just smiled down at her.

“God I love you…”

“Shut up!” she hissed against his lips before he kissed her again, but relaxed after awhile.

Matt just giggled at the two before they took the stuff they needed.

At the end of the day, they had finally finished there work, and Y/N was balancing a few glasses of selfmade probably horrible iced tea, but nobody cared about that.

“You did great guys.” she praised them and gave both of them a kiss on the cheek, seeing how they were much more relaxed with eachother.

“And you especially, my little painter!” she hugged Ben who tried to escape her kisses, while everybody started to laugh.


	17. The Jump

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Jun 1st, 2018

All of them were standing in the water, fishing rods ready, while Ben was digging nearby in the dirt.

“Found another one!” he shout whispered and placed the wiggling earthworm into a mug, were others were already waiting.

On his last run, Matt and Ben had found an old Fishing Shop and since they had a lake directly next to them, it would have been a waste not to use this advantage.

Uncle Luke was snoring in his rocking chair on the porch, the book he was reading hung loosely on his hand.

When Y/Ns rod started to shake lightly, she squealed quietly and furiously tapped Kylos shoulder.

“Pull it in! Quick!” trying to pull in the line she shook her head.

“I can´t I think it´s stuck.” getting pulled towards the water, Kylo quickly grabbed her waist to catch her. Instead of grabbing the rod, he just lifted her up and tried to retreat from the water.

“It really seems stuck!”he grunted while trying to pull her back.

“Whats the problem?” Matt asked and looked over to them.

“I think we have a goddamn shark on this freaking line.” Y/N held onto the rod with all her strength and Matt quickly got behind Kylo to pull at him, Ben soon joined and tried to pull his brothers leg.

With one loud splash, they all landed into the water. Kylo quickly held Ben up who was coughing out the water, while Matt and Y/N came back to the surface.

Pulling at the string Y/N soon held up a small fish and all of them bursted out into loud laughter.

Throwing the fish back into the lake, since they wouldn´t be able to eat it, the watched it before it quickly vanished.

“How many did we get until now?” Ben asked, while taking a peak at the bucket.

“Only two, we still have to fish some more.” Matt sighed but Y/N seemed determined to continue their fishing hunt.

Since they had finished the expansion of the Hut and Matt and Ben had their own rooms, while Kylo and Y/N stayed behind in their little roof, everything between them became more relaxed.

“Okay then we will take care of the water.” Matt and Ben left the sea while Kylo took his fishing rod again and stood next to Y/N.

“When we don´t get enough Fish, we will need to go on a hunt.” she whispered quietly to not scare the animals in the water.

“We will manage, we did the last months.” Kylo grinned.

Suddenly hearing a static crackling behind them, Y/N looked over her shoulder.

“You are scaring the fish!” she called to Matt until they suddenly heard a voice in the static. Quickly pulling in their lines, Y/N and Kylo waddled out of the lake and next to Matt who was staring at his self build radio.

“Did you hear that?” Ben asked excited but Matt shushed him, then it was a very familiar female voice.

“Mum …” the blonde muttered and almost couldn´t believe it.

“Wait…” Kylo turned the volume up and listened closely. Maybe it was because of the static, but it didn´t sound like a live broadcast until the speech repeated itself.

“It´s just a recording. Who knows when they put that up.” the hope that had build up suddenly vanished again.

“But she is talking about a place, a laboratory! Shouldn´t we at least check that out?” Matt spoke up and they all retreated inside the hut.

“They talked about Seattle, that would be a little over 30 hours with a car, but we don´t even know if we can get that much gas. Besides what about food and other things we would need to take care of. What if it ends up like Washington or the CDC?.” looking down at the map that Y/N had put on the table.

“This message could be put up shortly after we lost dad…” he was scared, like everybody else in this room. They had nothing but disappointments and finally when they had something like a home and now there was this temptation to leave all that behind, but would it be enough to risk?

“Okay, everybody sit down, it´s time for pros and cons.” Y/N said and climbed onto her chair.

“Pros?” “We could find our mother.” Matt said quickly.

“If there really is a lab, that would mean we would be safe as well right?” Ben asked, but Kylo shook his head lightly.

“It means that they have a place to work, but it´s not something to life.” Y/N nodded at that and even Luke agreed.

“It would be like canned Tuna.”

“So that would be more like a contra. Any more?” Y/N looked at the map again.

“Wait… where was the lab exactly?” she asked again but before anyone could answer she already grunted annoyed.

“It´s on a fucking island. It´s outside Seattle, right here!” pointing at the map everybody quickly looked over it.

“The only way there is this bridge.”

“Fuck… what should we do…”

 

They had a long discussion this evening, many maps were scattered around the floor, a possible route marked on them.

“How many gallons of gas would we need?” Kylo asked Matt who was handling the numbers.

“With reserve… we should be good with 80 gallons.”

“This is basically a suicide mission…” Kylo cursed and let himself fall into the comfy couch.

“But it´s Mom. We can´t give that chance up. At least we would know what happened.” Matt tried to convince him.

“Besides, we could meet other survivors.” Y/N joined Matt and Kylo groaned even louder.

“Fine… but we need to plan this through!”

And planning they did, it took them almost 2 weeks to gather everything they would need for such a long trip, but the worst of it was to leave their new home and Uncle Luke behind.

“And you are sure you don´t want to come with us?” Y/N asked, hugging the old man tightly.

“I would only slow you guys down, I´m not as sporty as I used to be.” he lightly chuckled and pressed his nephews against his chest.

“Take good care of each other! And bring all three of them back you hear me!” he said especially to Kylo.

“I will not disappoint you.”

This would be the longest trip they would ever make and they weren´t even sure if they would make it.

Their roles were specificity picked. Kylo and Ben would look into places, Kylo mostly to kill biters, Ben to search for food or useful things while Y/N would defend the car if necessary and Matt would try to get in more signals with his radio.

Sitting on the top of an Office Building the were quietly watching a hoard of at least hundreds of them.

“They are moving west, they will probably collide with the other one we saw two days ago.” Looking through her binoculars, Y/N looked down at the small map.

“When they keep going in that direction, we will have a hard time getting to the bridge.” she mumbled and kneeled down next to the boys.

All of them were on edge, tired and hungry, but in this current situation there was not much they could do about that.

“What do you think? , How long until we can move again?” Kylo asked, Ben in his Arms who seemed the most tired.

“Hours probably, we could try to round them, but it would be dangerous and I don´t know is we can make it with the Truck.” she mumbled.

“No, that´s a no go, the Truck is not fast enough.” Matt agreed with her and they all sighed.

“And we need food…” she said quietly while brushing over Bens hair. Standing up again she looked around the other side of the building.

“I can see a small Korean Supermarket down their. Matt and I can go check it out while you two rest.” Y/N offered her boyfriend who had dark circles under his eyes.

And she was sure, that everyone of them had a little regrets to have left their home for this goose chase.

“No… no I go with you. Matt has a good point here to check for other signals.” Kylo suggested and with a sad smile she nodded.

“But then you rest…” she whispered and he nodded before placing a kiss on her forehead.

Climbing down the escape Ladder on the side of the building they sprung down on the truck that they had parked right under it.

“Okay, A quick in and out, we can´t afford to get stuck there.” Kylo mumbled while checking his silenced pistol once again.

“Got it.” readying her knife, they quickly sneaked across the street, while listening to the lous snarling and roaring on the other side of the big buildings.

Carefully opening the door, not to trigger the little bell on top of it, they quickly entered the store before listening for any movements inside.

Pointing at the other end of the aisle, Kylo looked at Y/N who nodded and made her way quietly over.

Checking every corridor, the store seemed to be empty and both of them relaxed a little.

“Okay, anything edible, get into your backpack. I´ll cover you.”

Holding his gun ready, Kylo looked to the store door and Y/n just grabbed everything they could maybe be able to eat. Most cans were already scavenged so the needed to risk the things that were already out of date.

Suddenly hearing the bell ring, an older men with red hair stumbled into the store out of breath.

“Not a fucking move!” Kylo hissed and the man quickly took a few steps back.

“Please I don´t want any trouble.” the stranger stammered and Y/N quickly returned to Kylos side.

“We need food. My family they need food.” the man hold his hand up in defence.

Looking over the mans shoulder, she could see a woman and two kids in a rusty old car.

“Kylo, take the gun down…” slowly laying her hand on the weapon he let it sink with shaking hands.

“There is not much left here, but you should be quick.” she advised the stranger and wanted to leave with what they had scavenged.

“D…do you have a camp?” the stranger asked, while grabbing a few chips bags.

Kylo barely shook his head to Y/N. She knew he didn´t trust this man, because he hadn´t noticed the family in the car outside.

“We know someone who owns a farm. It is pretty safe there.” grabbing a map from the cashier counter she marked the farm.

“His name is Carl, he will give you shelter and food if you help him a little with his work.” she explained and the man suddenly hugged her.

“Thank you!!” patting his back a little, Kylo pulled her out of the store, rounding the mans care and helping Y/N climbing the Truck.

“You shouldn´t be so trusting.” Kylo reminded her and she knew that he was angry but she only scoffed lightly, before they could here small thank yous, from the car. The kids waving towards them which made Kylo side.

“At least next time.” he admitted and climbed after her.

 

It took them over a week to nearly get to their destination. Kylo had to take over the car after Y/N almost fell asleep on the steering wheel. Now that they were so close, they could hear the transmission clearly through the radio.

“On the next Crossroad we need to go left.” Ben who was navigating them looked up throught the window, to match the streetsigns.

“Just one more corner.” Y/N mumbled hopeful before Kylo stepped suddenly onto the brakes.

Just when they were about to turn the corner, they were almost ambushed from the right side by the horde they had tried to avoid the last few days.

“Fuck! Reverse!!! Reverse!!” hitting Kylo to get him out of his shock, he quickly shifted the gear, before pressing the paddle down until the bottom. Y/N and Matt grabbed Ben to keep him safe in case they would crash.

“Get into the next corner, if we get around we can make it to the bridge!” Ben screamed while being squished by the two others.

Holding onto their seats Kylo turned the car around before keeping the speed up so that they could get away.

“But we can´t let them get over the bridge!” Matt shouted looking over his shoulder, the biters following them.

“We won´t…” mumbled Y/N who could see a cabinet right next to the entry of the bridge.

Looking at Kylo he only nodded.

“No! No, that is bullshit we are not doing that!” Matt instantly opposed to the unsaid plan.

“Matt it´s the only way! You two keep driving! We can pull the bridge up and get rid of the rotten bastards.” Kylo grinned, but his hands were shaking.

“But we can do that from the other side as well!”

Looking in the rareview mirror his younger brother shook his head.

“They are to close already! Just do it!!” stepping onto the brakes, Kylo quickly got out of the car while Y/N grabbed a Walkie, rolled it into a plastic bag and stuck it in the back of her jeans.

“As soon as we make it over there we will give you a call.” she promised and gave Matt a quick kiss on the cheek before she did the same to Ben who had tears in his eyes.

Throwing Kylo his backpack, she shouldered hers and jumped out of the car.

“Go! Find Mum!” Kylo shouted and Matt stomped on the Gas pedal.

“You know we probably won´t make it…” Kylo mumbled and Y/N smiled up at him.

“I know…” her lower lip was quivering and her voice broke.

Breaking the glass of the door, they broke into the security room. Y/N had her binoculars out, watching the car get further and further away while the screaming and roaring from the undead came closer and closer.

“Come on…” she mumbled until she saw that the red Truck had passed the marked line.

“Now!” she screamed to Kylo who connected the ripped open cabled and with a rumbling sound the bridge started to slowly lift itself up.

Joining Y/N, she slowly grabbed his hand while they saw the horde of undead walking towards them.

“I love you.” his voice raspy, he leaned over to her.

“I love you too…” she whispered against his lips, sharing their probably last kiss, before both of them started to sprint to the edge of the bridge.

“Whatever you do don´t let go!” Kylo shouted and with all of their strength the two of them jumped.


	18. The General

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Jun 8th, 2018

The ice cold water was pressing the air our of the air lungs and they could feel each others fingers slip from their hands.

Trying to grab each other again, they needed to fight against the waves and their air was getting dangerously low.

Opening her eyes, Y/N tried to orient herself in this spin of dark and light. Quickly swimming towards the white hues in the waved, she could soon feel the air fill her lungs again.

“Kylo?!” for a moment she could see his mop of hair engage from the water before he got pushed down by another wave. Trying to dive in his directions she got hit by a piece of wood. The pain making her shut her eyes before Y/N felt a hand around her wrist. Getting pulled up she looked into Kylos brown eyes who seemed more then relieved until he looked up again.

“Shit.” pulling her quickly close against his chest, he turned them both around before his back collided with a big rock, which made a horrible cracking sound and he growled in pain.

“Kylo?” she asked whimpering and shivering from the cold water.

“I think my arm is broken…” he spoke through gritted teeth.

“I will get us out.” trying to climb next to him to take the pressure of her body off of Kylo.

Pushing herself of the rook, she could feel the ground under her feet. Taking the rope from her backpack, she quickly tied it around Kylos waist.

“The shore is right there, I will pull you out.” standing on her tip toes, she pulled of her jacket before wrapping it around his arms which made him hiss.

“Sorry….”

It took a few tries but soon she could get out of the water before pulling Kylo out of it.

“Okay… we made it …” she took a deep breath laying on the cold shore.

“Let me get a look at your arm.” Y/N unwrapped the jacket again and took a deep breath.

His shoulder and upper arm already started bruising. Letting her fingers touch his arm, she looked for the broken area.

“Okay I don´t know if it really is broken, I didn´t feel anything but just to be sure I will support it with some branches.” she explained to Kylo who only nodded his eyes closed.

“Are you okay?” she asked worried.

“Just trying not to puke…” he mumbled while taking deep breaths.

Taking the straightest branches she could find, Y/N laid them next to his arm to stabilize it with the last bandage she had left in her backpack.

Helping Kylo sit up, she leaned him against the bridges pillar. Y/N brushed the wet hair out of his face, before she gently cupped it and pressed a few kisses on his cold lips, just genuinely relieved that they both made it.

He returned her smile.

“I´ll make us a fire, I hope the walkie didn´t get busted.” Looking around she saw a few of the biters fall over the high end of the bridge, but it helped keeping the hundreds others down and away from this place.

How many minutes were they in the water? The moment they crashed in the water, she wasn´t even sure that it really happened. Maybe she had a concussion.

Pulling the Walkie out of the back of her jeans she unwrapped the plastic bag. It didn´t get wet and it wasn´t cracked.

“Matt? Ben? Can you hear me?” while she waited for an answer she made a poorly small fireplace, so that they could warm up.

Pulling the wet shirt from Kylo, she tried to dry him up as best as she could before carefully putting him into a warm sweatshirt. At least not everything got wet in his backpack.

“We don´t have any painkillers with us…” she mumbled while looking through their stuff.

“Just give me a moment, then we can make our way to that stupid lab.” Kylo breathed heavy.

“Are you sure?” he was already paler then usual.

“No, my sweetheart. But we can take care of me when we found the others.

Slowly nodding, Y/N agreed.

“Alright.”

 

The streets were empty, no biters and no other humans were here. Y/N was supporting Kylos every step, while she tried to get in contact with the other two.

“Come on you guys, answer me…” she sighed until a small voice answered.

“Ben?” she asked but they only heard a few words between the bad crackling.

“Hot … Dog…”  
confused the both of them looked down at the Walkie.

“Did he just said Hot Dog?” Kylo asked and Y/N looked around, suddenly grinning.

“I think I know what he means.” seeing a big old neon sign of a Labrador with a hot dog in his hands, they soon followed the sign to a restaurant type of place.

Walking by the Truck it was smeared with bloody handprints. Not trying to let their fear get to them, Kylo and Y/N quickly went inside.

“Ben?” she shout whispered and the chaotic brown head showed up behind a fallen desk, his eyes stained with tears.

Quickly running over to him, Y/N wrapped her arms around the small boy, whose body was shaking.

“Matt he… I don´t know if it is a bite or…” he sobbed and Kylo fell onto his knees next to his older brother.

His leg was bloody, trousers ripped. Gently pushing Ben towards Kylo, he took the small boy in his not wounded arm, while Y/N cut open the jeans from Matt.

Looking at the wound she shook her head lightly. “I can´t tell either… it almost looks like your ripped open shot wound, but at the same time it could be a bite…” she whispered looking through the bags the small boys seemed to have dragged here.

“Did you hear any Gunshots?” she asked Ben who shook his head, sobbing against Kylos chest.

“We need to get him to the Lab, if they are really still working on something like a cure… it´s our last chance.” her boyfriend mumbled and she nodded.

“Ben I will need your help honey. You are the only one right now I can count on.” ruffling through his hair, the small boy quickly dried his tears and nodded.

It was hard work, with both of the older brothers wounded and Matt unconscious, Y/N and Ben were the only one who could protect them now.

Laying Matt on the cargo bed, Kylo and Ben joined him.

“You got your gun ready?” she asked placing the last bags onto the car, Ben nodded.

Jumping in to the Truck it took a few tries to get it started again. She just hoped they would be there soon and it wouldn´t be for nothing.

 

Driving close to what seemed to be a reinforced metal fence she carefully stepped on the brakes, so that the boys, wouldn´t get hurt even more.

Climbing out of the Truck, she rested her hand on her gun while looking around the gate.

“Hello?! Is anybody there? We need help!!” she actually didn´t even expected an answer, thats why she was even more surprised when at least 7 people pointed their rifles down at her.

“Who are you and what do you want?” a heavy armoured soldier asked.

“My name is Y/N! I have two wounded with me and a small boy! We heard your message through the radio, that they might be a safe place here…. Please…”

For a moment nobody said anything before the one she had talked to nodded slightly and with a rumble the gate slowly opened.

“Get inside!”

Relieves she jumped back into the car and stepped on the gas. “Are they gonna help us?” she heard Ben asked and she could only hope so.

“Stop your car, Hands over your head and get slowly out, we will take your weapons for now.” one of the soldiers advised and she nodded slowly, while turning of the motor.

They should´ve felt safe now, but she was just so nervous that she feared to puke on their shoes.

“Y/N!” hearing Bens whimpering she looked over her shoulder. He was shaking and scared of the masked mans, not knowing if he really should give them his gun.

“It´s okay, Sweety.” Taking a few steps closer, Ben let the gun fall into the mans hand and quickly jumped into her arms, when she helped him down from the cargo bed.

“It´s okay I´m here…” she whispered in his ear while stroking over his hair, watching how a few people helped Kylo down and got Matt on a stretcher so they could easily transport him.

Walking over to Kylo he pressed a kiss against her temple.

“You seem familiar boy. What is your name?” the heavy armoured soldier, slowly came closer, before pulling of his helmet.

“Kylo, you are General Hux right? Is Armitage…?” the General nodded knowingly.

“Armitage and Phasma are fine. They are here as well, but for now we need to get you guys into quarantine and let docs look at you.”

Holding out a hand he lead them into the big building.

“Will Matt be okay?” Ben asked the big man.

“We will have to wait what the doctors have to say, boy.”

From outside the building didn´t look like much, it seemed grey and cold, but when they were inside it was nice and warm, everything shining in a white light.

“Is my mother here as well?” Kylo asked after a while of silence.

“One step at a time, boy. For now how about you give the boy to this lady and you two get looked at first.”

Suddenly Kylos and Y/Ns alarm clocks were ringing in their head, when they noticed the two armed man behind them and two woman in front of them, probably doctors.

“You want to separate us?” Kylo asked his body tensing.

“We need to be careful as well. So just follow the orders for now.” the General only answered and with one nod from Kylo, Y/N slowly let Ben down on the ground before grabbing the arm of the soldier behind her and throwing him against the wall.

Pressing a handgun into Bens hand, before she took the riffle and knocked the man she took it from out, while Kylo did the same, even with his hurt arm.

“Get us to Matt! Now!” Kylo shouted and the General only scoffed.

“Do you really think you two and that little brat can just take over?”

“You want to find out?” Kylo growled, loosening the safety.

Looking at their eyes, even Bens, he knew they would be ready to kill in order to keep their family safe, but why should he care. He wanted to grab his Walkie to call in reinforcements until a voice boomed through the big entrance.

“That is enough General Hux. These are my children.”

All of them looked up to the balcony in the entrance area from the building. An older woman was leaning against the railing and inspected the scene in front of her.

Kylo needed to admit that she looked as pretty as he remembered even in this time of chaos. Especially when she finally stood in front of him.

“Oh my boy, what happened to you.” she stretched her hand out to inspect his scar, but he quickly pulled his face away to stand beside Y/N. Not even Ben was going towards her and rather hugged Y/Ns leg.

“You abandoned us.” Kylo suddenly hissed and his mother lowered her gaze.

“Dad he… even he didn´t knew where you were! We … we had to ….” feeling Y/Ns hand in his he squeezed it tightly.

“I would have contacted you, when…”

“Stop! Don´t give me your stupid excuses that you always had for leaving us behind for your work.” he quickly interrupted her.

“Where is Matt?” he didn´t care any more, Kylo couldn´t even tell what was worse, that she was alive and had abandoned them or would it have been more of a relieve to know that she died and that was the reason why she couldn´t contact them.

“The doctors are taking care of him. And I beg you to let someone look at your Arm as well.” he wanted to interrupt her again but she held up a hand and Kylo closed his mouth.

“You won´t be separated, but I want that you let them look at you and we will bring you something to eat.” she promised and he only huffed.

Looking over to Y/N and Ben they both nodded slowly.

“Would you please give back the weapons that you took.” Leia asked calmly.

“No.” Kylo answered and gave Y/N the second rifle, which she shouldered. Ben stowed away the handgun in the back of his jeans like they had taught him.

“God you are as stoic as your fa…”

“Don´t you dare…” Kylo growled dangerously low and she stopped.

“Follow me then.”

Y/N hold onto Kylos and Bens hand while following their Mother. It was a weird sensation to finally meet his mother through these kind of circumstances.

They were brought in what seemed like a small room with two beds and a very small bathroom.

“Somebody will bring you food and new clothing soon.”

“You´re just gonna leave again, huh?” Kylo scoffed but Leia sat down on a chair in the corner.

“I will be waiting with you.” the older woman watched Y/N, who sat Ben down on the bed.

“Are you okay? I will help your brother for a moment, alright?” kissing the top of his head he nodded shortly.

Seeing Kylo struggle, Y/N quickly got over to him.

“Let me help you, you idiot.” she grinned slightly and carefully pulled the sweatshirt over his head.

The bruising had gotten worse but she was quickly distracted when Kylo leaned down to her, to lean his forehead against hers.

“It will get better soon.” she whispered while she gently stroked over his cheek, since she knew he was in a lot of pain.

Leia was watching the both of them closely and asked herself how they probably met, before she saw all the scars on her sons body. They must have gone through a lot in this year and not even her youngest son dared to look at her.

When the doctors arrived, Y/N made space for them so they could tend to Kylo properly while someone else brought them new clothes.

“The food will come soon.” the woman informed them and Leia nodded.

“How about we get you washed up?” Y/N asked, after the nurses had taking a small blood sample from them, Ben who followed her into the bathroom. She almost couldn´t believe how dirty she was from that damn ocean water.

Brushing through Bens damp hair, Y/N sat with him on the other bed, while watching Kylo in his daze. He now had an arm cling around his bruised arm and was high on painkillers. At least his arm wasn´t broken it was only a severe contusion, Y/N knew they wouldn´t hear the end of it.

“Are you done with your meal?” she asked Ben when he finished his last bite.

“Yeah…” he mumbled quietly before cuddling against her chest. She could see the frustration on his face and had a good guess why he was completely ignoring his mother.

“I´m glad that my boys were in such good hands.” the woman suddenly spoke and Y/N nodded shyly.

“I did what I could. Kylo saved my life more then once, I just try to help as best as I can.”

“Thats not true!” Ben suddenly interrupted and looked up to her.

“You did so much, you saved Kylo when he was about to die and almost died trying to do so!” smiling down at the small boy, she wrapped her arms around him and squeezed him tightly.

“Do you think Matt will be fine?” the small boy mumbled so quietly that only her could hear.

Y/N didn´t want to lie to him, but the truth would hurt just as much.

“I don´t know.. I really don´t.”

The two of them embraced each other, while waiting for hopefully good news.


	19. Vaccine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Jun 15th, 2018

Opening her eyes again, the bright neon lights blending them. Her head hurt as if someone had knocked her out.

Trying to remember what happened, she wanted to lift her hand to her forehead, until she noticed that she couldn´t move.

Y/Ns hands were cuffed to a hospital bed.

“What the ….” looking around she also noticed that she wasn´t in the room they were brought yesterday, but rather a sterile medical examination room.

“What is happening?”

“Don´t move too much or you will pull out you needles.” hearing an unfamiliar voice to her right, she turned her head.

There was a person completely in white, checking the needle in her elle bow.

Remembering the last night, how sleepy she had felt after the meal they had provided to them. They had drugged them. She had woken up, when they had tried to rip Ben away from her and before she could wake up Kylo, they had knocked her out. Y/N quickly started to pull on her cuffs.

“Where are they?!” she screamed at the person and started to struggle against her restrains.

“Please calm down, we are not finished with your examination.”

“Fuck your examination!” noticing that her legs were free she risked a kicked and the person stumbled back.

“Get me out of here! NOW!!”

 

When Kylo woke up from his painkiller induced slumber, his head was still spinning and since one of his arm was in a cast he wasn´t really able to hold his balance.

Noticing his mother sitting on the empty bed next to him, Kylo groaned a little.

“Where are Y/N and Ben?” he asked closing his eyes for a moment while he sat up.

“They are having their personal examinations.” she answered quiet cold and Kylo raised a brow.

“What is that supposed to mean? They weren´t hurt.”

“But they given us very interesting blood samples.” from the look she was giving him, he knew immediately that he wouldn´t like the explanation that would follow.

“Where are they?!” he asked, now more threatening.

“Like I said, they are being taken care of. The antibodys in their blood might be able to create a cure, but only together. I know you want to leave again as quickly as possible. But we need them here! They could be the cure for all of this! They could save humanity!” she tried to persuade him, but he only scoffed and pulled his arm away when she tried to touch him.

“You will not take them away from me! Not after all that you took already!” he started to scream and pulled the needle for his transfusion out of his arm.

“You left us behind! US! Your goddamn family?! I had to kill Dad! Because you left him behind! Matt is saying between live and death, because we risked everything to get here because of a stupid recorded message of yours! We left our home just for this bullshit here! Finding out that out mother abounded us!”

She let him scream, let him throw stuff around, let him have his tantrum that he was probably holding back all this time.

“We left our safe home, just to get punched in the face by the reality that our mother didn´t give a shit about us!!” suddenly Leia stood from the bed and let the back of her hand collide with his cheek.

He didn´t even flinch and looked her right in her eyes.

“I tried to safe this world, for our family!”

“Bullshit!” he hissed.

“The fucking doctors don´t even fucking need you here for your goddamn fucking cure!” clumsily putting his sweatshirt over his head, until he noticed something heavy in it. It was the handgun that Ben had yesterday, he must have hidden it in here.

“Take me to them. I won´t let you take this away from us too. I won´t.”

Holding the gun at his side he was following his mother who was hopefully not tricking him into a trap. At this point he would believe anything. That´s why he was even more relieved to see Y/N, when they unlocked the door for him. Even though she was screaming at the nurse in the corner who was to scared to move.

Quickly making his way over to her Kylo took her in his arm.

“I thought I lost you …” he mumbled and pressed a quick kiss onto her chapped lips.

“You know that your not getting rid of me that easy.” she chuckled lightly, before they finally got her free from those cuffs.

“Where is Ben?” pulling on her normal clothing that they had taken from her, she quickly followed Kylo tasking the gun from his hand.

“She will bring us to him now. Right?” it wasn´t really a question, since Kylo was speaking in such a threatening tone but Leia nodded, before unlocking the next room.

Quickly running towards him, Y/N pulled him in her arms. “I´m sorry! I´m sorry I couldn´t protect you.” she whispered, while stroking over his small back.

“It wasn´t your fault.” he whispered between relieved sobs. Helping him change from that ugly hospital gown into his normal clothes, Kylo gently ruffled through his hair.

“Can we see Matt now?” Ben asked, while getting lifted up from Kylo, so nobody would be able to snatch him away again.

Leia shook her head lightly. “He isn´t conscious yet.”

“Doesn´t matter. Bring us to him.”Kylo demanded but his mother shot him a look.

“Your brother just had surgery! He might not be able to move his leg any more, so don´t act like a child and let him rest!” she suddenly shouted back.

“We want to see him!” this time it was Ben who yelled back at his mother, which took everyone by surprise.

Leia opened her mouth tro say something but got interrupted by another nurse that was running up the hallway to them.

“General Organa, your son… he…” everyone suddenly tensed up before they followed the nurse who was returning what seemed to the improvised intensive care unit.

“What is with him?” Kylo was the first to ask when they saw him through a glass window.

The nurse seemed reluctant to tell the strangers as well why she called Leia, but she only nodded to allow it.

“It was a bite, we could make sure of that. And the fever has started! If we don´t move quickly we could lose him, General.” the Nurse explained and now looked at Y/N and Ben.

Kylo sighed and nodded towards his mother. “Tell them.”

Leading them into a quiet room, were they wouldn´t disturb anyone, Leia took a deep breath.

“From the blood samples you gave us yesterday, we could determine something very interesting.” she started and set down onto a chair, waving with her hand she wanted them to sit down as well.

“Such as?” Y/N asked and took Ben from Kylos arm.

“Both Ben and You, are infected.” Leia didn´t knew how she could tell them this more sensitive, so she just got straight to the point.

“Wait, infected?! You didn´t tell me…” shushing Kylo before he would start a tantrum again she slowly nodded.

“H…how can we be infected? We … we weren´t bitten or scratched.” confused and shocked, Y/N tried to make sense out of this.

“If you had any open wounds, no matter how small and you came in contact of a Undeads blood there is a high possibility you got infected.” The nurse next to Leia tried to explain it.

Y/Ns hand immediately lifted to her neck, while her fingers brushed over the long thin scare around her throat.

“That night in the hospital …” remembering that horrible night, her cut throat and the walker she accidentally gutted that had covered her with his blood and innards.

“But, that was half a year ago. I would have been dead already.” she countered quickly, but Leia and the nurse exchanged a look as if this was supporting their thesis.

“And Ben was never …” but when Kylo and Y/N looked down at the small boy he seemed guilty and frightened.

“When we were at the CDC and that Walker got my leg, I got scratched. It was just small and you didn´t see it… I´m sorry … I was so scared that you might need to do the same with me that you did with Dad … and you were already so sad already” he admitted and pressed his body closer against Y/N.

“Oh Ben …” calmingly stroking over his back, she pressed a long kiss against his forehead.

“But if they are infected, why didn´t they turn?” Kylos voice was shaking, he was frustrated, frustrated that he couldn´t protect his little brother that day. That he was not able to notice it sooner, since Ben had a bad fever later. Now it all seemed to make sense.

“Did you have a fever too? The night were ….” he didn´t even dare to say it and Y/N slowly nodded.

“I thought it was the dislocated shoulder and the exhaustion but …” getting pulled into Kylos arms, she leaned her head against his chest, shocked with this new realisation.

“But what does that mean for us?” Y/N asked Leia.

“Somehow, the virus inside of you two has mutated. It changed the antibodys in your blood. Which makes you two the first immune person we ever saw. And a possible solution for a cure.”

Placing a hand against her forehead, Y/N could only shake her head in disbelieve. “Holy shit …” she mumbled.

“Yes indeed.” Leia agreed with a light smile.

“So what will you need from them? You wanted to hold them here like prisoners.” Kylos grip around Y/Ns shoulders got stronger and she knew he was worried.

“For the time being blood. Matt is running out of time and you might be the only people to safe him now. After that we would like to do some examinations.” leaning back in her chair, Leia folded her hands in her lap.

“I know you would like to leave as soon as possible.” she looked at Kylo.

“But this would help a lot of people and as soon as we are done, you are allowed to leave.”

Kylo took a deep breath and looked down at Y/N and Ben, who seemed just confused and frightened.

“Can we have a moment alone?” he asked, while combing through her hair with his fingers and the rest of the strangers left the room followed by Leia who quietly closed the door.

“What do you think?” he asked his girlfriend and let his hand rest on her neck.

“Like they said it´s Matts only chance. I just…. can´t believe that… I mean we didn´t even noticed what happened.” she kept stroking over the long scar on her neck.

“If we can safe Matt, of course I will do it. It´s just … such a shock.” looking down at Ben, he was in a sort of daze.

“And we will be here for awhile like it seems. Will that be alright with you?” she asked worried, since he didn´t leave one chance to fight with his mother.

“I´ll manage.” he promised, ruffling through Bens hair.

“What about you champ? You will be a hero.” smiling down at the small boy, Ben lifted his head. Being called a hero seemed to has lifted his spirit.

“Do you really think it will safe Matt?” he asked the older two.

“Only one way to find out, buddy.”

 

Leaning against the wall, Kylo was watching Y/N and Ben cuddled up against each other in the one hospital bed, while a nurse was extracting the last bag of blood from them.

“They will need a lot of rest. We will bring them something to eat and drink soon.” the nurse informed him before leaving the room.

“How are you feeling, my Love?” sitting in the chair next to the bed he carefully took her hand.

“Tired. Ben fell already asleep.” she sighed heavy to catch her breath, she was a little pale and Y/N couldn´t really hold open her eyes any more but she was as beautiful for him as ever.

“Will you look after Matt soon?” she asked, carefully pulling the blanket over Ben.

“Yeah I will go over soon, but I wanted to make sure you guys are okay too. At least here I can help you guys, but there I´m just standing around.” he sighed frustrated.

“But you are there for him, that matters.” she just smiled at him which gave him a little more hope.

Standing up he brushed the hairs from her face to let his lips rest a moment on her forehead, before placing a trail of small kisses down her cheek to stop on her lips.

“Rest.” Kylo whispered quietly before leaving the room quietly.

Walking along the corridor he soon stood in front of the glass window that was separating him from his older brother.

“I swear to you, if you fucking die now, I personally follow you into hell and kill you myself.” he murmured while placing his hand against the cold glass.

Watching how one of the doctors injected the vaccine into his arm.


	20. Neglect

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Jun 22nd, 2018

When Y/N opened her Eyes the next morning, she saw Kylo hanging loosely in his chair while snoring loudly. Brushing over her tired eyes, she slowly sat up and looked around. It took awhile for her to remember were she was and what had happened.

Brushing the drool away from his mouth, she smiled lovingly at him, while he jumped out of his sleep.

“Is everything alright? Are you okay?” he immediately asked and she gently brushed over his cheek.

“Just a little weak, don´t worry. Where is Ben?”

“Mother allowed him to visit Matt, if a nurse is with him.” Kylo explained, yawning.

Nodding to his answer, Y/N let her fingers brush through the hair on the back of his neck.

“Any progress with Matt?” she asked, worried that the vaccine was a failure.

“They didn´t tell me yet…” sighing he looked into her sad eyes, before joining her in the hospital bed, embracing her in his arm.

“It will be alright, when you feel better, we will gonna pay him a visit as well. But for now you need to get your strength back. You gave a lot of blood.” he tried to reassure her, but at this moment, who knew what might happen.

Hearing a knock on the door, both of them quickly looked up. A nurse entered with a wheelchair.

“Your Mother asked me to bring you to your brothers.” she explained and Kylo understood that the wheelchair was for Y/N.

Even with just one arm, he lifted her up with no problem before gently letting her down in the chair again.

They were nervous, to say the least, what would they encounter when they would enter the room. But the nurse wasn´t leading them to the usual very secure ward, but rather into a normal hospital wing.

Scared, Y/N instinctively grabbed Kylos hand who was walking next to her.

Would they get shown his dead body now? Did the Vaccine fail? At the moment they could only think of the negative things until the nurse take a turn into a room.

Ben was sitting on the bed, Matt laying right beside him, his chest slowly lifted and sunk his breath shallow but steady.

Both of them looked confused at Leia who was holding Matts hand.

“His fever has gone down and his Blood work is clean. He is cured.” she smiled up at them and Y/N immediately broke out into tears while Kylo was kneeling down to hold her.

“Will he wake up soon?” Ben asked quietly and his mother carefully brushed over his hair.

“We think so yeah, but he will need a lot of physiotherapy because of his leg.” she explained and the small boy nodded.

But that also meant that they needed to stay here longer then Kylo wanted. Which now, that he knew that Matt would be okay again, didn´t seem so bad.

“Now you two are really heros.” he smiled, pressing a long kiss against Y/Ns temple.

 

“You goddamn brats!! How many times do I have to tell you not to run in the Hallways!!” Dr. Reid was shouting after them, while Kylo was quickly pushing the Wheelchair, with Y/N and Ben in it, around the Corner.

Laughing to themselves, Kylo steered them into their shared room and quickly hid, before they could here the Doctor stomp by the door.

“What did you guys do this time?” Matt asked, looking up from his book.

“Unlike you, we at least try to have some fun.” Kylo grinned while jumping next to Matt on his bed, before stealing some of his food.

“You are just running away from you examinations again.” the blonde mumbled while pushing his glasses up his nose again.

“That too…” Y/N agreed and carefully stumbled over to them, before Kylo quickly caught her.

“Careful, Love.” he whispered, while helping her up the bed.

“I´m okay…” she tried to reassure him and cuddled up against his chest. But he knew it wasn´t the truth. She was recovering slower then expected, since the Doctors needed every bit of blood, Y/N was of course to polite to say no.

So it was Kylos turn, to make the best choice for her, even when she wanted to help people he wouldn´t let her to it with the risk of her own well being.

“There you are!!” Dr. Reid came into the room, he was a middle aged man with side cuts, really nice beard and tattoos all over his arms.

“You can´t hide forever Y/N especially if it is such an important exam.” he said shaking his head at the young people.

“Come on we get it over with and you can go back and…”

“If you dare to say Fun, I´m gonna slap you Doc!” she sighed annoyed but allowed him to sat her back in the wheelchair. Kylo immediately followed.

Leading them into one of the examination rooms, he carefully carried the girl to the bed, which Kylo endured only because it was for Y/Ns own good.

“So how are we feeling today, little Lady?” Dr. Reid pulled on his gloves while Kylo only rolled with his eyes at the nickname.

Avoiding Kylos eyes, Y/N stared down at her hands. She knew she had to be honest with the Doctor, but she didn´t want Kylo to worry.

“A little dizzy…” she stated honestly, and Reid pushed her chin up lightly so he could shine a light in her eyes.

“Look up please… Do you always feel dizzy or just from time to time?” he asked while focusing on her eyes.

“From time to time, sometimes when i´m just sitting or laying, sometimes when I try to stand up.” explaining her situation, she followed his instructions before blinking a few times after the light examination.

“Still weak legs?” nodding to his answer, Dr Reid brushed over his beard. Kylo was slowly taking Y/Ns hand, over a month now and she still wasn´t getting any better.

“You won´t take any more blood, right?” he asked sternly and Reid nodded.

“No, she is to weak for that. I know you hate it but you need to rest even more. Lot´s of sleep, lot´s of fluids and I see how many sweets we can spare for you, little Lady.” he grinned slightly, before continuing her exam. He checked her temperature, her ears, her vision again when she suddenly felt dizzy and her vital signs. Just going from head to toe.

“We probably won´t take blood for a good two month.” he mumbled and Kylo seemed confused.

“We won´t be here for so long, you know that right?” asking the doctor he sat down next to Y/N.

“Oh I know, your Mother probably didn´t tell you yet, but she plans to send a few people back with you. Me included.” The doctor answered.

Surprised the two looked at him. That were exceptional good news, not just they wouldn´t have to go the whole way back alone, but they would have capable people with them. It would be so much safer then they expected.

“But, your condition isn´t suitable for travelling at the moment. Don´t worry we will get there.” patting her head slightly, Kylo watched the doctors action with squinted eyes.

They were a lot of boys who had looked after Y/N here already, but this Doctor seemed like the biggest threat to Kylo.

“So no funny business, not like today. I mean it. No running around in the hallways even if she is sitting in the wheelchair.”Reid said very sternly and slowly stood from his chair.

“Understood?” he especially looked at Kylo who only scoffed.

“Sure Doc.” rolling his eyes Kylo wanted to grab Y/N to bring her back in her room but Reid stopped him.

“She stays here, I will give her an infusion and you should let her rest.” putting another needle in her arm, Y/N surrendered and made herself more comfortable in the bed.

“I will take a closer look at your recent blood work again. We will find something that will help you.” Leaving the two alone for a moment, Dr. Reid left the room.

“He can be a real pain in the ass…” mumbling to himself, Kylo brushed Y/Ns hair out of her face.

“Kylo… he is just trying to help.” carefully wrapping her fingers around his wrist, she pressed a kiss against his hand.

“But he can´t do jack shit! One whole month and your still not any fucking better!” he cussed, rubbing over his eyes in frustration.

Feeling guilty she pulled the blanket up to her nose.

“I´m sorry…” she whispered.

“No! No Love, it´s not your fault.”quickly trying to reassure her, Kylo sighed. He didn´t want to make her feel guilty but at this point everything he said seemed wrong.

When the doctor returned, he pulled the needle from the infusion out of her arm again and Kylo was finally allowed to bring her back to their room, which was empty. Matt seemed to be in his physiotraining and Ben always seemed to wander around somewhere were he shouldn´t.

Gently laying down with her in their bed, he spooned her from behind and held her tightly.

“Try to sleep … I will be here.” and he wanted to, but when she fell asleep and he couldn´t, he quietly left the room to meet up with Hux and Phasma, who persuade him to get out of there.

It was a warm welcome for him to spend some time without worrying, or succumb to his boredom. Of course he still liked to spend time with his girlfriend, but at the moment he felt like he was in a prison. The same feeling he had when he had to share the room with his brothers and Y/N.

Or maybe it was because it felt normal again, sitting in somewhat of a town filled with people and his friends.

It was a little bit of his freedom that he had won back, until he saw Doctor Reid on the other side of the street, talking to an elderly couple that his mood turned sour.

“Still jealous of the handsome Doctor?” Phasma asked grinning, which made Kyo growl.

“Your such a cliché Ren.” Hux only shook his head.

“And a Drama Queen!” his stepsister added and he nodded.

“Okay damn!” Kylo tried to stop their before he noticed a nurse that was running to Dr. Reid, panicked and shocked.

Kylo immediately had a bad feeling seeing the Doctor run back inside the Facility.

“Hey where are you going?” the two siblings asked while Kylo instinctively followed the tumult. Something just felt wrong.

His steps got faster and faster until he stopped in his tracks, seeing Reid carrying Y/N with blood dripping from her head.

“Y/N!!!” trying to run past the staring people he suddenly got back from a few nurses.

“No let me go!!” he watched while Reid was placing her onto one of the beds, screaming instructions at the nurses who gathered instruments.

“Get her blood bags! If we don´t balance her blood level….” Kylo heard through the mumbling from the audience.

“But the vaccine…” one nurse obliged but Reid shot him a furious look.

“Her blood! NOW!!” trying to stop the bleeding wound on her head, Reid suddenly stopped in his movements. She wasn´t breathing any more.

“Come on little Lady, not now.” laying his hands on her chest, he started to rhythmical pushed down on it, before laying his lips onto hers to give her his breath.

“Breath!” leaning down to her again after giving her a heart massage, she finally gasped for air.

“Atta girl… just breath…” pulling a mask over her face, when finally the nurse returned with Y/Ns blood.

“Hook her up! You´re gonna be just fine.” he promised the fragile girl , who probably didn´t understand anything in her daze.

Finally getting away from the nurses that were holding him back, Kylo slowly entered the room, trembling in fear.

“Is she…?” he couldn´t say it.

Finishing the bandage around her had, Reid was turning around and quickly stepped over to Kylo before punching him right in the face.

Stumbling back, he fell onto the ground holding his hurting jaw.

“You had one Job! And that was to keep her safe!!” the Doctor screamed but Kylo couldn´t even say anything, then it was the truth.

He left her alone, even though he promised to stay with her.

“What … what happened…?” he asked with a shaking voice, before he stood on his feet again.

“She fell down the big stairs, probably lost consciousness before that.” the Doctor explained still furious at Kylo.

“Y/N and your little brother are the last hope for humanity! If one of them dies it´s the end! If somebody hadn´t found her it would have been your fault!!” walking in front of Kylo, the Doctor was standing in his full height, which made him even bigger then the boy.

“And now get the fuck out of this room. Or I´ll make you…”

Taking a last look at Y/N and seeing her tear streamed face he slowly walked outside the room, but stood in front the big glass window that was separating them.

Seeing Y/N even more weakened then before and not being able to help her in any way, he suddenly felt so helpless especially since it was his fault.

Kylo didn´t know how long he was standing there while watching the Doctor do his work. Seeing all the machines that were now connected to her and hearing the beeping noises it just now sunk in how severe this situation was.

He could have lost her, just because he was so egoistic. Thinking that he needed some alone time, now it seemed so stupid to even think that.

Now his mind only thought one thing, that he wanted to turn back in time so she wouldn´t get hurt, but that was impossible.

Suddenly feeling something hitting his leg he looked down at Ben who was screaming at him.

“Why did you leave her alone?!” the small boy didn´t stop hitting him until Kylo leaned down to him.

“I´m sorry…” was the only thing he could say, before he felt Matts hand on his shoulder.

 

The next few days, Kylo or anyone else wasn´t allowed in her room besides Dr. Reid who tried his best to get her back into shape.

In the first days she was mostly in a sort of trance, barely could answer questions until Reid finally found a solution.

Since the vaccines was only worked after they combined Bens and Y/Ns samples, there was a big possibility that Bens blood could help Y/N recover.

And gladly so it did.

When she was able to really recover, they were finally allowed to visit her. But when Kylo was standing in front of the bed she was laying in he froze. Not knowing if she would be angry or disappointed in him.

“Babe…” she whispered and held open her arms to embrace him.

“Well go on…” Reid mumbled while looking at her recent blood work, which seemed much better then before.

With quick steps, Kylo was laying in her arms, repeating apology over and over.

“Shh… it´s okay. It was my fault.” Y/N tried to reassure him but he shook his head.

“I shouldn´t have left you alone on your own…” kissing the tip of her nose she smiled lightly.

“Love, it´s not your fault. I thought I was better, but I wasn´t. It was a stupid mistake.” brushing through his hair, she rested her lips on his scalp.

He promised her and himself, that he never would leave her side ever again.


	21. A New World

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally posted on my Tumblr on Jun 29th, 2018

“Kylo no more!” Y/N breathed heavy, while running after him, jogging in place Kylo only grinned at her.

“Come on, just to me and then you´re done!” he promised and stopped to hold his arms open. She wasn´t even running any more, they were more like wobbly baby steps until she let herself fall into his arms.

“You did great, Love.” praising her he hugged her tightly.

“Eww, you´re so sweaty …” she groaned but hung loosely in his arms.

“Oh really ….” rubbing his cheek against hers she started to struggle and whine in his arms.

“But you beat your limit today, you know what that means.” proud, eh pressed a kiss against her forehead.

“We can finally go home.” she giggled while Kylo threw her over his shoulder.

“I´m starving…I could eat an elephant…” hearing her tummy growl next to his ears, Kylo started to laugh.

 

Letting her down in front of Reid who had watched their jog, examined Y/N very quickly and held his hands up so both of them could high five him.

“Good Job you two. Your better start packing then and say goodbye to anyone, since you are fit to travel we will leave this evening.” Reid explained and Kylo looked over to Y/N.  
He wanted to at least say a proper goodbye to Hux and Phasma, but he also wanted to take proper care of his girlfriend.

“Go on then. I will be fine.” she smiled immediately, almost like she read his mind.

“Don´t you want to come with?” laying a hand against the side of her face, Y/N leaned into his touch. He just wanted to make sure that it was really okay.

“It´s fine. Besides I´m really hungry and nobody will help us pack. Especially with Bens chaos.” chuckling to herself he nodded slowly.

“I´ll see you later then.” pressing a longing kiss onto her lips he soon walked towards the small somewhat of a town.

Waving after him, Y/Ns smile soon fell and Dr. Reid furrowed his brows.

“You didn´t tell him yet, did you?”

“No and I don´t intend to.” crossing her arms in front of her chest, she sighed deeply before she turned around to the building.

“Y/N this is serious, you had a miscarriage. You should at least talk to somebody about it.” Reid followed closely behind her.

Quickly turning back to him, she talked in a quiet manor, not to alarm anybody or make them suspicious.

“It would have happened anyway, you said it yourself. The Fall or the next time I would´ve had my period. It wouldn´t have survived no matter what because I wasn´t recovering and my blood levels were too low. Hell, I didn´t even know I was pregnant and neither did he. Kylo is feeling guilty enough as it is and I´m not making it any worse.” she argued and Dr. Reid sighed deeply.

“I just want to make sure that you are okay and that if you want to talk about it. I will listen.” placing his hand on her head, she slowly nodded.

“Thanks, but I´m okay. I really am.”

Returning to her room, she saw Matt had already started packing. It wasn´t much they had to pack since they only arrived here with what they needed.

After a shower, Y/N held onto one of Kylos sweatshirts and pulled it over her head before she snuggled up in it on their bed.

When Ben entered he climbed to her and ducked under the book she was reading.

“Oh the little Explorer shows up.” she giggled and tried to brush the dirt off of Bens cheek.

“I heard we are going home today. Is it true?” brushing through his hair Y/N nodded.

“Are you sad about that?”

Shaking his head Ben cuddled up against her chest.

“No I can´t wait to get away from here.” he grumbled and she knew why. Even though there were children with Bens age here, he just couldn´t connect with them in the way he wanted to. The still small boy was annoyed by their games and behaviour and rather spend his time alone or with Y/N and his older brothers. It had probably something to do with what Ben has gone through over this past year and who would judge him for that. He needed to be much mature more quicker then any of those children who were safe with there familys almost from the beginning of the outbreak.

“Do you want me help you packing?” she asked and Ben only shrugged with his shoulders.

“No, you rest. I can do it myself.” holding Ben back when he tried to stand up, Y/N grinned.

“Ah we let just Kylo do it. Wanna go eat?“

“Fuck yeah!” the small boy shouted and sprung out of the bed.

Shaking her head at his swearing she only could smile. What did she expect with someone like Kylo around who swore 24/7.

Sitting in the Cafeteria, Ben and her were munching on some spaghetti when Kylo entered.

When he seated himself next to her he brushed her hair back to kiss her temple.

“Hey, did you say goodbye?” she asked while offering some of her food. Taking a bite he nodded.

“Yeah all done.” wrapping an arm around her waist he gently leaned his head against hers.

Pushing her head against his shoulder, Y/N smiled.

 

When they prepared to leave, Kylo was pleasantly surprised with a clean and repaired Truck. The goodbye with Leia was mostly short and the only one who hugged her was Matt and Y/N while Ben and Kylo allowed her at least a small pat on the shoulder.

And soon they were on their way home. Dr Reid was on the steering wheel while Matt and Ben joined him, letting Y/N and Kylo rest together on the Cargo bay while the three big vans with other soldiers followed.

Of course this time it didn´t take them as long as the trip they had to take to the lab and soon they could see the fence that was keeping the biters away from their home.

“Uncle Luke!” Y/N and Ben yelled when they saw the old man fishing in the lake. Running towards him they almost threw him over with their powerful hug until they noticed the red haired men next to him. It was the guy Kylo and Y/N had met in the Korean Supermarket in the city.

His family was living on the Farm with Carl and he almost broke their backs when he hugged them.

Most of the soldiers got a place on the farm while Dr. Reid and three others staid at the hut.

Letting herself fall onto Kylos and her mattress, Y/N stretched and cuddled up against the blankets.

“Nothing is like home…” smiling to herself, she could feel the mattress dip under Kylos weight, before he laid close behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

Now that they were finally home, in their room, together, Y/n felt guilty for not telling him. Taking a deep breath, she turned around in his arms and pressed herself against his chest.

“Are you alright?” he asked quietly, while soothingly stroking over her back. Sitting up again she was nervously playing with her fingers while avoiding his gaze.

“There…There is something I should tell you … I ” rubbing over her eyes, it was so much harder to even put it into words.

And suddenly the tears just flooded out of her eyes.

“Hey! Everything is alright!” Kylo quickly sat up and puller her into his arms.

“Shh…” trying to calm her down, he let his lips rest onto her forehead while she tried to calm down, her sobs shaking her whole body.

“You don´t need to say anything. I know..” Kylo whispered while he could feel her fingers dug into his shirt.

“Just because I´m an idiot sometimes, don´t think I get when something is wrong. Especially with you. Since the fall you constantly put you hands on your stomach, you don´t even notice it yourself…” he whispered and slowly pushed up her head to look into her eyes.

Gently brushing her tears away he sadly smiled down at her.

“Our baby wasn´t ready for this world yet. And if you want … one day it will be ready and we will make sure of it.” slowly nodding to his words, she let him pull her into a long kiss.

“Do you need a moment?” he asked after a while while she had rested her head onto his chest while he was brushing through her hair with his fingers.

“No, I´m okay… maybe we should help the others.” pulling the hood of his sweatshirt that she still head on over her head.

Lifting her up, she wrapped her arms around his neck while her legs held onto his waist. Carefully walking down the stairs he held onto Y/N.

Dr Reid already took the spot on the sofa while the three soldiers would use the workshop and one of the vans at living space for the time being.

Sitting down on the rocking chair on the porch, Kylo wrapped his arms tighter around her while rocking them both softly.

“I thought we wanted to help …” she mumbled against his neck and he looked around.

“They can handle it. We don´t need to be so on edge any more.”

Y/N started to giggle.

“Says the one who is always leading and trying to keep everyone save.”

“Shush!” shutting her up with a kiss, she lifted her head a bit and looked around. It was so weird to see all these people come together were they were normally just alone.

This looked like a good new beginning.

 

They kept this evening quiet and rested most of all, then even though the travel was easier then before with so many people but that didn´t mean it was exhausting.

“Maybe we should go out for a hunt, Get a deer so we have all something nice and warm to eat.” Y/N suggested after stretching on his lap with a loud squeal.

“Sounds good. I get our jackets.” placing her on the porch, Kylo got back inside.

“Then I get the sniper.”

Just when they were about to leave Reid called out to them.

“Where are you guys going off to?”

It was weird to see the Doc in casual clothing and for a moment the both of them were just staring at him.

“We´re going out on a hunt, so we can have somewhat of a barbecue later.” Y/N explained and adjusted the sniper rifle over her shoulder.

“Mind if I join you guys?”

“Not at all.” both of them said and soon they were calmly walking through the forest.

“The usual spot?” Kylo asked and looked around for a moment before changing directions.

“Should be good enough.” jumping over a few branches Y/N nodded while Dr Reid was quietly following them.

For him it was most important that both of them were safe and it wasn´t bad to get a feel for these woods as well.

Especially how they had behaved during the travel. Even the soldiers learned more things from them than they had in their training at the lab. It was fascinating what a difference it made when he realised that they spend most of their time on the streets and always on the move.

How Y/N had made the soldiers listen her, even though they didn´t want to at first. She just had the same intimidating energy like Leia.

“Boost?” stopping in front of a tree, he leaned with his back against it.

“Thanks!” she pressed a quick kiss against his cheek before, Y/N took a few steps back to get some speed before jumping on his folded hands before he basically threw her up into the tree, were she landed safely on a thick tree branch.

“You good?” calling up Kylo saw her little wink and grinned to himself.

While she hid in the tree to watch a nearby clearing, she readied her rifle, the two man staying quietly at the tree.

It didn´t take long until the heard a gunshot above them and Y/Ns quiet call that she would come down again.

Stretching his arms, Kylo caught her when she jumped from the big tree before they looked at there loot. It was a big deer with beautiful antlers, with a clear shot right through his head.

“She is pretty strong…” Reid mumbled while he helped Kylo carry the dead animal.

“The strongest woman I know.” with a smile Kylo agreed.

“She did so much, not just with the vaccine I mean. Y/N saved my life, stitched me together, risked her life to get me everything I needed to survive and cared for me while I was in a coma. All while she still took care of my brothers and took the lead. She is one fucking hell of a girl. Something I had never imagined in our old lifes, but here we are.”

Y/N opened the gate for the boys and soon the deer was butchered and a big campfire build so everybody could sit around it and eat.

This night was the start of a new beginning.

 

The first week was a lot of work, the group helped the soldiers to find their way around this place so they could look for more survivors or clean the streets and nearby towns from the undead.

For Kylo, Y/N, Matt and Ben, it got rather calm and they were finally able to enjoy themselves again after the awkwardness at the lab.

Matt worked hard with his leg and sometime they couldn't´t even notice his little limp any more.

Reid became a much needed father figure especially for Y/N, which Kylo didn´t mind since he knew his worries were ridiculous.

Even Ben bonded with the 2 children of the red headed man, and his older siblings were already betting when he would have a crush on his sweet little friend. And every month, Y/N and Ben would give some of their blood to help other people who were on the brink of death.

It finally felt like a normal life again.

 

3 years later, Leias group made contact with a few other countrys who were trying to reach other survivors and the message of a cure gave them new hope.

Humanity could start to recover, even though almost 65% got wiped out. But the good news were that, besides Ben and Y/N, 21 other survivors were diagnosed with immunity to the virus.

It never went completely away, but at least they had a way to fight back.

 

Opening his eyes, Kylo huffed slightly and tried to adjust to the bright sunlight that was shining in their room. Averting his gaze, he turned his head to the sweet sleeping figure next to him.

Y/N was cuddled up in her favourite patchwork blanket, her hair had fallen into her face while he could hear quiet snores coming from her.

Smiling to himself he carefully brushed the strains that were disturbing his view away from her face, before leaving feather light kisses on her cheek.

With a loud grumble she slowly crawled over to him before pushing her face against his chest in protest.

“Good Morning Love…” he whispered in her ear and could see her cheeks blush.

“Do we need to get up already?” mumbling against his chest, Y/N curled more and more into her blanket.

“Well… we are babysitting today and showing them how to shoot.” stroking over her back, he tried to loosen the blanket a bit.

“Ben is there he can teach them…”

“He is part of the babysitting, come on. The New World is waiting for us.” slowly looking up at her boyfriend her brows furrowed.

“Or …maybe the world is waiting for something else….” wiggling with his eyebrows, Y/N only rolled her eyes.

Throwing a pillow in his face, she jumped out of the bed and run down the stairs before he followed her quickly.

Hearing her laugh through the hut, Kylo couldn´t contain his own. Maybe the world was really ready for another Solo.


End file.
